Military Divorce Survivor's Benefit Plan (SBP)

[mauricetill]

What is the name of your state? Maryland

Trying to get this agreement done my lawyer and I are suppose to meet with my wife and her lawyer. This is the last resort and I am going to ask for us to go to court, before I do I have several questions:

She wants 20% of my military retirement, and $800 child support, (I offered $400 and I would pay my daughter's private school (elementary) tuition $336 directly to the school. She wants it all herself. My question is do I have to agree for my child to attend private school in the future, I had it in the agreement. If she doesn't go to private school then its $636. I feel my daughter can go to public school.

Currently I am paying the house note, and she still wants me to pay the school, just came back from overseas, but it's like they don't care if I live, right now I am living with my mother and commuting to my new duty station. The house is on the market, but she wants to stay in there until the end of December. Can I deduct the mortgage from her child support if she doesn't help pay it in December?

She want my SBP (insurance), when I retire, can I request 1/2 of her 401K and that she provides insurance for me since my standard of living has dropped and do I have to give her the whole 55% or cover her for the same amount she would get in my retirement which is 20% or can I add my child and not her as a beneficiary?

 

[simpleguy05]

Don't sign $hit. Let a court determine what you pay in CS...not her.

 

[mauricetill]

Purchase of a New Car

Thanks, she has been giving me the run around for year now.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I have a question she purchased a new car, $618 monthly car note. Does she have to reimburse me for 1/2 of the purchase of the car, even though we are separated, but with no agreement.

 

[IrishLady47]

In a marital property distribution, you have the same entitlement to 1/2 of the portion of her 401k earned during the marriage as she has entitlement to 1/2 of the military retirement pension earned during the marriage. You may wish to do a financial assessment of both & split the difference. Or, I've known military couples to agree to this--you keep yours, I'll keep mine. SBP is basically an insurance program, that is negotiable. You must have the decision spelled out in your court order. However, if she is awarded a % of your retirement as a property distribution, she probably will get SBP to cover that. You can request the same of her, insurance to cover a future distribution of pension if awarded as property.

Make sure you have a lawyer knowledgeable about military & Federal provisions. To educate yourself, go to www.armyg1.army.mil/retire to find more about SBP and the USFSPA (Uniformed Services Former Spouse Protection Act).

Are you filing for divorce in MD? If so, go to the MD state law website (sorry, didn't save the link) to learn more about child support guidelines & other property distribution.

 

[mauricetill]

Thank you this helps.

 

[nextwife]

And you do NOT have to agree to private school. My daughter is in public school - and attends with kids from very wealthy, successful families who live in homes worth 1-2 million. Those kids are in PUBLIC school.

 

[LdiJ]

And you do NOT have to agree to private school. My daughter is in public school - and attends with kids from very wealthy, successful families who live in homes worth 1-2 million. Those kids are in PUBLIC school.

I have to disagree with you on that one. The kids were/are already in private school...obviously based on the parent's mutual decision to send them there. A judge is likely to order that to continue.

I would agree with you if they weren't already in private school.

 

[nextwife]

I also know families who started their kids in private day schools, and they ALWAYS moved them to our public district after grade 8. And many move them to the public district after grade 4, when the public school kids transition into middle school.

Actually, the dayschool kids I know ALL then attend their PUBLIC HSs. NONE complete their school careers in private school. So even when those parents elected private grammar school, they did not expect nor contemplate their kid's entire school life precollege to ALL be in private school. The dayschool actually ends at 8th grade with no private HS to transition to.

So even intact frmailies who may want private at one age group, do NOT have them continue their entire school careers in private school.

 

[IrishLady47]

A basic fact of divorce is that, unless one or both adults are financially well-off, there is going to be a change in the standard of living. You cannot maintain two households on the same income or incomes at the level you maintained one. If there are decent, available public schools--private school tuition may be a luxury that has to go.