Military, domestic violence, divorce

[getbb]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Florida

My husband and I have been together 10yrs married 4. He up and left last year and was our income, he is not paying any support. I can not afford an attorney so I hope I can get advice. I leave for basic training with the military in Oct which complicates things. My husband was arrested on Domestic Violence against me and at the first appearance his lawyer said she was filing divorce papers, but I never recieved any. At the injunction hearing the lawyer stated she was filing them that day..again nothing. I believe she is holding the divorce papers to intimidate me at these hearings. Can she do that? Can they file when I am away at basic and gain custody of our kids? What should I do?

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Florida

My husband and I have been together 10yrs married 4. He up and left last year and was our income, he is not paying any support. I can not afford an attorney so I hope I can get advice. I leave for basic training with the military in Oct which complicates things. My husband was arrested on Domestic Violence against me and at the first appearance his lawyer said she was filing divorce papers, but I never recieved any. At the injunction hearing the lawyer stated she was filing them that day..again nothing. I believe she is holding the divorce papers to intimidate me at these hearings. Can she do that? Can they file when I am away at basic and gain custody of our kids? What should I do?

Heck yes they can do that. Where do you expect your children to be while you are in basic? What is the injunction for?

 

[mistoffolees]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Florida

My husband and I have been together 10yrs married 4. He up and left last year and was our income, he is not paying any support. I can not afford an attorney so I hope I can get advice. I leave for basic training with the military in Oct which complicates things. My husband was arrested on Domestic Violence against me and at the first appearance his lawyer said she was filing divorce papers, but I never recieved any. At the injunction hearing the lawyer stated she was filing them that day..again nothing. I believe she is holding the divorce papers to intimidate me at these hearings. Can she do that? Can they file when I am away at basic and gain custody of our kids? What should I do?

You really need to go see an attorney to understand what your options are. Some attorneys will give you an initial consultation free and it's well worth while to find out how the system works.

The situation is complicated. As I understand what you've written, domestic abuse charges have been filed, but he has not been convicted, right?

You're free to file for divorce any time you wish. You don't have to wait for him to do so.

The problem is going to be custody. If he gets convicted of the abuse charges, it could help you to gain custody, but if you're out of the picture (away at basic camp), your case is greatly weakened - particularly since you haven't given any indication that he's a danger to the kids. The courts prefer for kids to be with their parents. If you're not able to have custody, it's going to essentially default to him. Leaving them with a sitter for 6 months while you're in basic won't cut it.

If he is convicted of something which presents a danger to the kids, then you have a better chance, particularly if a family member will watch them while you're in basic. But what are you planning to do after basic? What if you're shipped overseas? It may well be that the best thing for the kids is if he DOES get custody (depending on the nature of the abuse charge).