more harrasment from ex's family

[herdoc2005]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? WA

After following the advice received here, I contacted my ex's lawyer to take care of the court ordered "attorney fee's due to her not being able to pay" order.

Now...her father again is sending harrasment emails to myself as well as mailing letters to my employer claiming that I havnt paid past day care costs (never was I contacted about these day care plans before hand). They claim to have receipts, but I have never seen anything, just demanding that I send money!

Is it legal for them to contact my employer? (my employer is laughing him off anyways) but the point is that are people allowed to do that? I have been told that it is illegal, and that that is the purpose of court.

thanks again

[mistoffolees]

Originally Posted by herdoc2005

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? WA

After following the advice received here, I contacted my ex's lawyer to take care of the court ordered "attorney fee's due to her not being able to pay" order.

Now...her father again is sending harrasment emails to myself as well as mailing letters to my employer claiming that I havnt paid past day care costs (never was I contacted about these day care plans before hand). They claim to have receipts, but I have never seen anything, just demanding that I send money!

Is it legal for them to contact my employer? (my employer is laughing him off anyways) but the point is that are people allowed to do that? I have been told that it is illegal, and that that is the purpose of court.

thanks again

It is legal for him to contact anyone he wishes unless there's a court order saying otherwise.

If he interferes with your work, you could possibly sue him for tortuous interference with your work relationship. You could also ask the court for a no-contact order, but if he's not threatening, that might be hard to get. However, if your employer is laughing over the whole matter, you may find that it creates more trouble than its worth to try to sue him.

[herdoc2005]

Originally Posted by mistoffolees

It is legal for him to contact anyone he wishes unless there's a court order saying otherwise.

If he interferes with your work, you could possibly sue him for tortuous interference with your work relationship. You could also ask the court for a no-contact order, but if he's not threatening, that might be hard to get. However, if your employer is laughing over the whole matter, you may find that it creates more trouble than its worth to try to sue him.

I dont want to waste my time with this guy at all...I just want to find how I can make him stop contacting my work. Being in a professional environment, this type of attention is not good, even if its an outright lie!

I will contact a military JAG officer to find out the military's stand point. I know in the military the employers can not handle anything that is a civil case, unless it is non payment of child support.

thanks again.

[mistoffolees]

Originally Posted by herdoc2005

I dont want to waste my time with this guy at all...I just want to find how I can make him stop contacting my work. Being in a professional environment, this type of attention is not good, even if its an outright lie!

I already answered your question. You can petition the court for a no-contact order, although it's not a guarantee since you never claimed any physical threats.

However, I'd recommend against it. You stated that he's not doing any harm and your employer is laughing about it. He'll eventually get tired of it. If you escalate it by dragging him into court again, the attacks could get worse - much worse.

Bottom line is that you married him and lived with him for years. That was your choice. To expect that you can wave a magic wand and pretend it never happened is naive.

[herdoc2005]

Originally Posted by mistoffolees

I already answered your question. You can petition the court for a no-contact order, although it's not a guarantee since you never claimed any physical threats.

However, I'd recommend against it. You stated that he's not doing any harm and your employer is laughing about it. He'll eventually get tired of it. If you escalate it by dragging him into court again, the attacks could get worse - much worse.

Bottom line is that you married him and lived with him for years. That was your choice. To expect that you can wave a magic wand and pretend it never happened is naive.

Are you confusing information? I never married him! I was married to his daughter! I never lived with him, or even talked to him but a few times in the span of 7 years!

Like I said, I would rather avoid going to court, unless that is the only way to stop it. He can email me all he wants,that is easy to ignore, but the harassment at work is what affects my career! big difference

So...while I dont have a magic wand or ever ask for one, I am just asking if its against the law for someone to harass someone through their employer!

[mistoffolees]

Originally Posted by herdoc2005

Are you confusing information? I never married him! I was married to his daughter! I never lived with him, or even talked to him but a few times in the span of 7 years!

It doesn't change any of the issues. I didn't bother looking it up because it was irrelevant. Sorry.

Originally Posted by herdoc2005

Like I said, I would rather avoid going to court, unless that is the only way to stop it. He can email me all he wants,that is easy to ignore, but the harassment at work is what affects my career! big difference

So...while I dont have a magic wand or ever ask for one, I am just asking if its against the law for someone to harass someone through their employer!

I already told you. There is nothing illegal about her father, sister, brother, babysitter, third cousin twice removed, or bookie contacting your employer. It's a free country.

IF they do something that interferes with your job, then you have grounds to take action, but you have to go to court to do that. Or, you could try to stop them before they interfere with your job with less probability of success, but you also have to go to court for that.

If you want them to stop, you're unwilling to discuss it with them, and you're not willing to go to court, then you are, indeed, looking for a magic wand.

[herdoc2005]

Originally Posted by mistoffolees

It doesn't change any of the issues. I didn't bother looking it up because it was irrelevant. Sorry.



I already told you. There is nothing illegal about her father, sister, brother, babysitter, third cousin twice removed, or bookie contacting your employer. It's a free country.

IF they do something that interferes with your job, then you have grounds to take action, but you have to go to court to do that. Or, you could try to stop them before they interfere with your job with less probability of success, but you also have to go to court for that.

If you want them to stop, you're unwilling to discuss it with them, and you're not willing to go to court, then you are, indeed, looking for a magic wand.

I have discussed it with them and they are like argueing with a rock, it doesnt matter what proof you show, they have their beliefs and just argue. It all stems when events come up and my ex wife has to pay for her portion of something (that she has never paid for anyways). and its not that I'm unwillign to take them to court, I would rather not seeing that I live in NC, and they live in WA, therefore it would be a long flight for a simple court case. So if there was a law statign he couldnt do what he was doing, I could just forward that to him, and it would be over...(of course if he continued then I would just take it to court)

the reason I was asking, is because I did find (The Fair Debt Collection Practices Act
15 U.S.C. § 1792 et seq.)

which is clear about collection agencies contacting your employers about money, therefore it doesnt matter if its a free country, there are laws in place to stop certain forms of harassment when it comes to debt collecting, so I figured I would ask a place that had more knowledge than me to find out if ther was something in place to stop other individuals not labeled "debt collectors".

[LdiJ]

Originally Posted by herdoc2005

I dont want to waste my time with this guy at all...I just want to find how I can make him stop contacting my work. Being in a professional environment, this type of attention is not good, even if its an outright lie!

I will contact a military JAG officer to find out the military's stand point. I know in the military the employers can not handle anything that is a civil case, unless it is non payment of child support.

thanks again.

When someone owes alimony or child support, and isn't paying, its fairly common knowledge that if they are in the military, that contacting their command puts pressure on them to pay their alimony or child support.

I suspect that you ex's father is using that same rationale on the attorney fees, even though its not the same thing.

You might see if the JAG attorneys will write a "cease and desist" letter for you. If not, you may want to have a private attorney write one. That might work and would be fairly inexpensive.

[herdoc2005]

Originally Posted by LdiJ

When someone owes alimony or child support, and isn't paying, its fairly common knowledge that if they are in the military, that contacting their command puts pressure on them to pay their alimony or child support.

I suspect that you ex's father is using that same rationale on the attorney fees, even though its not the same thing.

You might see if the JAG attorneys will write a "cease and desist" letter for you. If not, you may want to have a private attorney write one. That might work and would be fairly inexpensive.

Thank you, that sounds like an idea!