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my kid needs help (really really long)

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justalayman

Senior Member
Indiana

bad situation needs lotsa info and background

* my daughter (MD) married to a-hole sil (AH) 2 1/2 years
* MD has bipolar just now getting it under control, had cysts removed from ovaries 1/18/06, Dr. thinks may have an STD (she was faithful, AH now has new lover (told to us by spurned lover of girl)
* AH did not want MD to work (AH was raised Mennonite, generally wives are subserviant)
* 1 car joint loan, title ?, debt ~$2000 (re affirmed in current BK but atty today stated MD may be able to add back in to her side of BK)(AH has taken and hid car)
* obviously in current BK status; no creditor meeting yet; (stupid kid debts)
* AH promoted Sept. to ~$60K/annual promotion from~$40k
* I believe there is a 401k ~$18k through AH work
*rented week/week cheap trailer paid til 1/28/06 AH as leasor MD as resident/occupant
* joint bank acct. $35. no other money accessible to MD
* they had been having troubles but 4-5 months ago seemed to be working out things.
*AH has insurance through work.

Here goes (and this is real folks, and yes I expect IAAL to hit me with the trailer trash stuff but I still need help)

AH works 2nd shift. Kisses MD bye Thurs. 1/27/06. Later txt mssg "I can't handle this anymore, I don't ever want to come home. MD's sister OD goes to be with MD and console. AH will not talk with MD, will only txt mssg with OD.
AH wants divorce (oh well he is an AH).

Fri. 1/28/06 I go and start packing up her stuff to bring MD to my house. Finish moving stuff Sun 1/29/06. I had changed the locks to protect remainder of MD's stuff while making multiple trips.

Monday morn. get hang-up phone call at 4 a.m.
I go to work. later ~1 p.m. LL called MD at my house. Tells her LL had to break door in MD will be responsible. Also MD will be responsible for rent through this Sat.2/4/06 (mind you only AH as lease holder) AH still had belongings in the trailer.

So here is the ???

Does AH have to maintain ins on daughter? (meds are $$$) How would this be enforced?
Can MD recieve spousal maintainance after divorce?
Can MD recieve some of AH 401k
How will this affect the BK?
Can she make AH pay for divorce?

Yes, now it is about the money the AH is a real AH to abandon MD this way.
 
Last edited:


LdiJ

Senior Member
I know that you tried to abreviate things to make it shorter....but it still made little sense to me.

Try telling the story more fully...but without any emotional issues.
 

justalayman

Senior Member
(son in law) 24 y.o abandoned (my daughter)25 y.o. they were married 2 1/2 years

Basically he left for work Thurs. afternoon. said later via txt mssg. I'm not coming home. Left her with virtually $0 , no transportation . (he is hiding the one and only car)Yes, I know he needs one to go to work, She hasn't talked with him since. All communication has been through third parties.

he makes about $60k /yr (promotion in Sept) from ~$40k in Sept.
She doesn't work; had surgery this month plus the hubby didn't want her to work. My daughter is bipolar (pretty bad , maybe unemployable?) just starting to get control, last 6 months.



He left the trailer they were living in (wk/wk lease). The rent was paid until last Sat only. He did leave all his stuff there though. I went and moved her to my home fri-sun.
His is the only signatore on lease, she is listed as resident/occupant. The LL called her today and told her she is responsible for this (current) week rent. Would a marital co-obligation apply here?


I believe he has a 401k of about $18k through work.

They filed BK in Oct.have not had creditors meeting yet (I believe something got screwed up somewhere)

Daughter talked with BK atty today, he said she may be able to add the car to her side of the BK. (they owe ~$2000)
---------------------
I guess simply asked:

*Can she ask for him pay for her divorce atty?

*Is she entitled to any of the 401k?

*Does he have to maintain insurance on her and how would that be enforced?(pre-divorce)

*Would she be entitled to post divorce spousal maintainance? At least med coverage.

How does this affect an ongoing BK case?

----------
I'm not sure this is a lot better. This is tough to be concise but not too short.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
That's a whole lot better....thanks....

You didn't say what state....but, as far as the landlord is concerned I would calmly remind him that she isn't a signatory to the lease, and that he needs to deal with hubby. I hope she got everything of hers out.

She needs to immediately file for divorce and ask that he be restrained from cancelling her medical insurance prior to the divorce. He probably couldn't continue her medical insurance after the divorce even if ordered to do so, most employers wouldn't allow that. However, a Cobra would likely be available. The marriage has been a short one and I really doubt that any kind of alimony is possible.

If your daughter is unemployable she should be filing for disability. She probably won't qualify for SSDI (not enough work credits) but may qualify for SSI...if so, she may also qualify for medicaid.

She would be entitled to a share of the amount of the 401k that accrued during the marriage. It may not be much. She would also be entitled to a share of the equity in the car.

The BK should be able to proceed....make sure the BK attorney adds the landlord to her side of the BK too.
 

justalayman

Senior Member
Thanks LdiJ: The state was in my first post: Indiana; land of the Hoosiers

My belief of post divorce maintainance would be based upon this:

IC 31-15-7-2
Findings concerning maintenance
Sec. 2. A court may make the following findings concerning maintenance:
1) If the court finds a spouse to be physically or mentally incapacitated to the extent that the ability of the incapacitated spouse to support himself or herself is materially affected, the court may find that maintenance for the spouse is necessary during the period of incapacity, subject to further order of the court.
(
(2) If the court finds that:
(A) a spouse lacks sufficient property, including marital property apportioned to the spouse, to provide for the spouse's needs; and
(B) the spouse is the custodian of a child whose physical or mental incapacity requires the custodian to forgo employment;
the court may find that maintenance is necessary for the spouse in an amount and for a period of time that the court considers appropriate.
(3) After considering:
(A) the educational level of each spouse at the time of marriage and at the time the action is commenced;
B) whether an interruption in the education, training, or employment of a spouse who is seeking maintenance occurred during the marriage as a result of homemaking or child care responsibilities, or both;
(C) the earning capacity of each spouse, including educational background, training, employment skills, work experience, and length of presence in or absence from the job market; and
(D) the time and expense necessary to acquire sufficient education or training to enable the spouse who is seeking maintenance to find appropriate employment;
a court may find that rehabilitative maintenance for the spouse seeking maintenance is necessary in an amount and for a period of time that the court considers appropriate, but not to exceed three (3) years from the date of the final decree.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
As added by P.L.1-1997, SEC.7.
There are several justifications in the cite above. One being the medical incapacity and the other, she was in Army ROTC when they got together and quit and the request of the hubby. The biggest thing that concerned me would be the time of marriage. I have no idea as to what requirements the courts would impose.

and again, thanks for the input.

Now back to the emotional pleading: would a jury find me guilty if I strangled the SOB?
 

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