out of state

[ram341072]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? New York
what consequences would a woman have if she moved out of state with her children if she had sole custody after a divorce judgement was awarded? My friend is trying to leave NY to CA for a bette job in the nursing profession and was told by others, that she couldn't do it without consent from her ex. Is this true? What is to stop her from doing it.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

 

[Proserpina]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? New York
what consequences would a woman have if she moved out of state with her children if she had sole custody after a divorce judgement was awarded? My friend is trying to leave NY to CA for a bette job in the nursing profession and was told by others, that she couldn't do it without consent from her ex. Is this true? What is to stop her from doing it.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

Did those custody/visitation orders mention relocation at all?

How long has been since the custody order was made?

What kind of visitation does Dad have?

 

[mistoffolees]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? New York
what consequences would a woman have if she moved out of state with her children if she had sole custody after a divorce judgement was awarded? My friend is trying to leave NY to CA for a bette job in the nursing profession and was told by others, that she couldn't do it without consent from her ex. Is this true? What is to stop her from doing it.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

The court will make custody decisions based on what is better for the children. Generally, the premise is that the children are better off with regular contact with both parents.

If she decides to move without her ex's permission, he could immediately go to court and ask for a court order to have the children returned to NY. The court might grant it. It's impossible to say how it would go, but the factors which would probably enter into it revolve around the amount of time the kids spend with each parent.

The more time the kids are spending with their father now, the better his chances are of blocking the move. The longer the kids have been in their current situation, the better the chances of blocking the move. And so on.

If there were an abuse issue and there was a court order against the father, this would, of course, change, but you didn't say anything about that.

Even if the parents can agree, they should get the court to approve it before she moves because he can always change his mind if there's no court order.

And there's a very good chance that she's going to be paying for the kids' transportation for regular visitation. If she's currently in upstate NY, the cost of living in CA will be much higher. If she's in the city, it will be more comparable. In any event, the 'better' job might end up not being as much of a benefit as she thinks.

In general, it's disruptive to the kids' lives and interferes with their relationship with the father. There are studies which show that one of the largest factors that determines how kids do later in life (career, staying out of jail, etc) is their relationship with their father (probably their relationship with both parents, but the study mostly involved kids who already had a strong relationship with their mother).

Bottom line is that you really need to think long and hard about it and I would recommend against it both for legal reasons and for the benefit of the kids. But if you do it, anyway, your ex could challenge it - and have a good chance of winning custody.

 

[nextwife]

It's also hard to believe that CA offers much better opportunities for NURSES than does NY. She's not a surf instructor or some other profession that is believably better to find employment in CA.

 

[ram341072]

answers to previous questions

Did those custody/visitation orders mention relocation at all? No, the biological father would not consent to this. The grounds for divorce are cruel and inhumane treatment in which the children were subject to witnessing. They do have a law guardian. The father has extensive mental health history including multiple inpatient stays for suicidal and homicidal ideation and diagnosis of bipolar I with psychotic episodes, PTSD, and rage disorder. A psychological evaluation results are pending.

How long has been since the custody order was made? April 2009 original order for sole custody, Joint custody was established in June when the mother was persuaded by him and he was taking medications and being counselled . Currently mom is trying to regain sole custody as he is non compliant with his treatments.

What kind of visitation does Dad have? Every other weekend

 

[mistoffolees]

The father has extensive mental health history including multiple inpatient stays for suicidal and homicidal ideation and diagnosis of bipolar I with psychotic episodes, PTSD, and rage disorder. A psychological evaluation results are pending.

That's a little confusing. The results are pending, but then you list a very detailed analysis. Do you have evidence of his disorders or not?

If he truly has severe mental problems, then your approach would be different. Do NOT just jump on a plane and take the kids - you'll only upset the court and the law guardian. Instead, go to court with some evidence that it would be to the kids' advantage to move. "the job market in CA is better than in NY" won't cut it - particularly for a nurse. Instead, you're going to have to show a job offer which is better than what you have in NY or some other reason why the kids should be allowed to move. If you don't have a job there, there's a chance you'll move and be unemployed - which is obviously doubly bad for the kids.

If you can show a strong reason for moving AND if you can show that it would not be good for the kids to be left with the father, then you have a good chance of getting a court order allowing you to move with the kids. You're still likely to be paying for their transportation back to NY to visit their father, so factor that into your decision.

You can also ask for only supervised visitation of there's evidence that he would be a danger to the kids.