Pregnant and divorcing.

[Jaded]

What is the name of your state? Pennsylvania

What is the name of your state? Pennsylvania

(This post is kind of like two subjects in one so I'm posting it in two sections...)

I'm 22 years old.. lived in PA, moved to CA and got married to my husband. We married this past December. Our agreement prior to getting married was that when we had children we would move back east to be with my family. When I turned up pregnant, he refused to move!!! I came back east to get some time away and de-stress (since the end of March, it is now June) but since I've been here he will hardly talk to me or try to work ANYTHING out. He goes back and forth and plays games, one day he says he loves me and wants me to come back which I was going to and then yesterday tells me he's sending me papers for annulment. WHAT?! Can he even get an annulment? I thought he had no grounds for this.. there was no fraud on my part, I'm not underage, we clearly have had sexual relations being that I'm pregnant, he wasn't forced by me to be married, we're not related.. so what other grounds could there be? He has a 4 year old son from a previous relationship that he has joint custody of (oh, he left his son's mother after their son was born too!) Do you have any idea what may happen as far as my child and custody goes (I'm 5 months pregnant)? Remember he lives in California and I am in Pennsylvania. He is going to try and get full custody of our baby. I live with my parents and I'm not currently working (due to pregnancy) and he claims they'll give him custody because he has his own place and a job. Do you know if he will have to come here for family court dates or will I have to go to California? Sorry this is so long but I'm totally clueless and worried... my first child and I'm so worried about everything.. please help.What is the name of your state?

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state? Pennsylvania

What is the name of your state? Pennsylvania

(This post is kind of like two subjects in one so I'm posting it in two sections...)

I'm 22 years old.. lived in PA, moved to CA and got married to my husband. We married this past December. Our agreement prior to getting married was that when we had children we would move back east to be with my family. When I turned up pregnant, he refused to move!!! I came back east to get some time away and de-stress (since the end of March, it is now June) but since I've been here he will hardly talk to me or try to work ANYTHING out. He goes back and forth and plays games, one day he says he loves me and wants me to come back which I was going to and then yesterday tells me he's sending me papers for annulment. WHAT?! Can he even get an annulment? I thought he had no grounds for this.. there was no fraud on my part, I'm not underage, we clearly have had sexual relations being that I'm pregnant, he wasn't forced by me to be married, we're not related.. so what other grounds could there be? He has a 4 year old son from a previous relationship that he has joint custody of (oh, he left his son's mother after their son was born too!) Do you have any idea what may happen as far as my child and custody goes (I'm 5 months pregnant)? Remember he lives in California and I am in Pennsylvania. He is going to try and get full custody of our baby. I live with my parents and I'm not currently working (due to pregnancy) and he claims they'll give him custody because he has his own place and a job. Do you know if he will have to come here for family court dates or will I have to go to California? Sorry this is so long but I'm totally clueless and worried... my first child and I'm so worried about everything.. please help.What is the name of your state?

The baby and you will be legal residents of your home state by the time that the baby is born. Therefore any custody matters would be under your state's jurisdiction. If you were in CA less than 6 months then you are a legal resident now of your home state....because you did not live in CA long enough to become a legal resident of CA.

Unless it would be possible to find you legally unfit (and living with your parents and being unemployed is NOT grounds to consider you to be legally unfit) he would have very little chance of getting primary custody of the child, primarily because that would mean moving the child out of the child's home state. Most likely he would have to visit in your state to start. However, eventually he will get parenting time in his home state. Normally that would be half of the major holidays and most of the summer.

Right now the health of your pregnancy is more important than anything else. So you need to relax and be under the minimum possible stress.

He can't get an annulment....it would have to be a divorce.

 

[nextwife]

As a married couple, He CAN file for divorce now, which would establish the home state for the divorce case, however. And she is NOT now a state of PA resident. The divorce could not be completed until the baby is born and the custody, CS can be addressed.

 

[LdiJ]

As a married couple, He CAN file for divorce now, which would establish the home state for the divorce case, however. And she is NOT now a state of PA resident. The divorce could not be completed until the baby is born and the custody, CS can be addressed.

She said that they married this past December, and that she moved back home in March. Therefore, if she was in CA less than six months, then she remained a resident of her home state.

Yes, he could file for divorce in CA. However her home state would have jurisdiction of custody matters.

 

[nextwife]

If she was going to put being near mommy and daddy ahead of being with her husband, maybe she shoulda NOT gotten married and move cross country? And certainly should have made sure to NOT get pregnant.

Now what? She wants to live near mommy and daddy but prevent her own child from having the right to a normal relationship with THEIR daddy. She's the adult. She should put her child's right to be with their father ahead of her wish, as an adult to stay by her parents. She's ROBBING her child of it's father to satisfy her wishes.

 

[Jaded]

Wow... thank you SO MUCH for replying. At least now I have somewhat of an idea of what could happen -- that's really important to me and I appreciate it. You're right about the stress factor.. I'm trying my best to relax and take it easy. I don't think I could say thank you enough.. lol.... but thank you.

 

[Jaded]

Nextwife...

You're taking it all wrong... before he and I got married, he agreed to come live back east for various reasons. It was a mutual agreement... cause it's cheaper to live here, cause we could afford a house, so our child would know my side of the family (baby is gonna be biracial.. my side is the ethnic side), etc. I didn't leave my husband.... *I'm* trying to work it out with *him*... I simply came here to de-stress!!!! It was temporary. But now he wants a divorce. HE is choosing for it to be this way. I never once said I left the state of California to live with my parents forever. I married him to be a family with him! HE is choosing to not stay married to me, so ultimately... yeah, there are going to be custody issues, as with any divorce.. but it's not my choice. So perhaps next time you go flying off the handle at someone, you should ask a question or two first because it's rude.

 

[Ohiogal]

She said that they married this past December, and that she moved back home in March. Therefore, if she was in CA less than six months, then she remained a resident of her home state.

Yes, he could file for divorce in CA. However her home state would have jurisdiction of custody matters.

YOu are not quite correct. The reason being because she is pregnant and divorce is in the works, CA could have jurisdiction over custody as well. The reason being they are married. He could ask that she be forced to return to California for the divorce and then drag it out until the baby is born. He is the LEGAL father of the child she is carrying. He can petition the court for that. OP has also availed herself personally to the jurisdiction of CA. She doesn't need to be a resident of CA for this to progress there.

 

[BoredAtty]

He could ask that she be forced to return to California for the divorce and then drag it out until the baby is born. He is the LEGAL father of the child she is carrying. He can petition the court for that.

What? He certainly CANNOT force that. The husband has no say in where she lives.

 

[LdiJ]

YOu are not quite correct. The reason being because she is pregnant and divorce is in the works, CA could have jurisdiction over custody as well. The reason being they are married. He could ask that she be forced to return to California for the divorce and then drag it out until the baby is born. He is the LEGAL father of the child she is carrying. He can petition the court for that. OP has also availed herself personally to the jurisdiction of CA. She doesn't need to be a resident of CA for this to progress there.

I strongly disagree. In fact, I emphatically disagree. She cannot be forced to return to CA except perhaps for court hearings...and that might not even be necessary. You know that she cannot be forced to return there for the divorce, therefore its wrong of you to say so. The court has no authority to order her to return to CA.

In addition, CA would not have jurisdiction over custody. Particularly if she was not in CA long enough to become a resident.

Of course dad is the legal father of the child, but that has absolutely nothing to do with jurisdiction.

Jaded, I really suggest that you get a consult with a local attorney to confirm the facts you are being given.

 

[Ohiogal]

What? He certainly CANNOT force that. The husband has no say in where she lives.

My apologies but I have seen it happen when the wife is pregnant. I have seen the strangest things put on.

 

[LdiJ]

I have seen it happen when the wife is pregnant.

Then it would be a illegal order, because it would be a direct violation of her constitutional rights.

 

[ajritter04]

Wouldn't it also depend on where they got married? I know in new mexico and nevada what county you were married in you must go back to for a divorce. My cousin got married in vegas then he and his wife moved to new mexico started fighting she wanted a divorce and the courts here told her she had to go back to las vegas to file.

 

[Golfball]

Wouldn't it also depend on where they got married? I know in new mexico and nevada what county you were married in you must go back to for a divorce. My cousin got married in vegas then he and his wife moved to new mexico started fighting she wanted a divorce and the courts here told her she had to go back to las vegas to file.

If you meet the state residency requirements, it doesn't matter where you got married. If you don't meet the residency requirements of your state of residence, it might matter, but only if you meet the residency requirements in the state where the marriage took place.

Edit: If you meet neither, then you can't get divorced until you do.

 

[Silverplum]

Wouldn't it also depend on where they got married? I know in new mexico and nevada what county you were married in you must go back to for a divorce. My cousin got married in vegas then he and his wife moved to new mexico started fighting she wanted a divorce and the courts here told her she had to go back to las vegas to file.

Pleeeeease don't do this! It only confuses the thread: NV and NM have NOTHING to do with this thread.