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  #1  
Old 06-22-2008, 11:46 PM
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Unhappy

property destruction


What is the name of your state? Florida

My husband recently moved out for a week or 2, had a friend pick up a few things like clothes and a toothbrush, and made it pretty clear he wasn't coming back. I went ahead and rounded up the rest of his things and put them in the garage and while doing that I went through some of his things. I figured he had filed for divorce. Well today I found out he is planning on coming back and hasn't filed for divorce. He still won't talk to me and I'm worried when he comes home and realizes I've packed him up and gone through some of his things that he is going to flip out. He has never gotten physically violent but it wouldn't be uncommon for him to start moving my things out of the house or start destroying things or even taking things that don't belong to him (i.e. things that belong to my children, from a previous marriage, that are in the house) while I am at work and no one is home. The house is in my name only and I owned it prior to our marriage. I changed the locks, but my parents say that since we are still married he can go into the house and take whatever he wants, whenever he wants. Is that true? Is their any way to evict him if we are still married? How can I protect my property? If I file for divorce how soon can I make him leave for good and keep him out of the house? Would a restraining order do the trick? Can I even get a restraining order if there is no physical violence? Also the mortgage payment was due a few days after he left and I was forced to pay it on myself (which wasn't easy). Can that be helpful in forcing him to move out and keeping him from destroying what doesn't belong to him? I have no problem with him taking his things out of the house but I have some very sentimental things in the house that I know he would target first and I have no way to get them out of the house before I go to work tomorrow. I just want to protect my home and a few things I hold near and dear to my heart. Please Help.
  #2  
Old 06-23-2008, 08:03 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by marriageisrough View Post
What is the name of your state? Florida

My husband recently moved out for a week or 2, had a friend pick up a few things like clothes and a toothbrush, and made it pretty clear he wasn't coming back. I went ahead and rounded up the rest of his things and put them in the garage and while doing that I went through some of his things. I figured he had filed for divorce. Well today I found out he is planning on coming back and hasn't filed for divorce. He still won't talk to me and I'm worried when he comes home and realizes I've packed him up and gone through some of his things that he is going to flip out. He has never gotten physically violent but it wouldn't be uncommon for him to start moving my things out of the house or start destroying things or even taking things that don't belong to him (i.e. things that belong to my children, from a previous marriage, that are in the house) while I am at work and no one is home. The house is in my name only and I owned it prior to our marriage. I changed the locks, but my parents say that since we are still married he can go into the house and take whatever he wants, whenever he wants. Is that true? Is their any way to evict him if we are still married? How can I protect my property? If I file for divorce how soon can I make him leave for good and keep him out of the house? Would a restraining order do the trick? Can I even get a restraining order if there is no physical violence? Also the mortgage payment was due a few days after he left and I was forced to pay it on myself (which wasn't easy). Can that be helpful in forcing him to move out and keeping him from destroying what doesn't belong to him? I have no problem with him taking his things out of the house but I have some very sentimental things in the house that I know he would target first and I have no way to get them out of the house before I go to work tomorrow. I just want to protect my home and a few things I hold near and dear to my heart. Please Help.
You have to look at things from his perspective, too. You and he are married and he has just as much right to be in the house as you do. He could come home and break in the doors if he wished.

You will not get a restraining order without evidence of violence.

If you file for divorce, you have SOME protection against him destroying your things (in that there are restrictions against squandering or destroying marital property), but that is not much protection if those things are probably of little financial value. Plus, even if he destroys them, the cost of proving it and enforcing those restrictions would be large.

All you can do is hope that he doesn't break your things today and then tonight move them to a safe place. File for divorce if that is what you wish, but your best protection is probably having a discussion with him so that he doesn't come home without warning and find all his things thrown into the garage. If he 'made it pretty clear that he wasn't coming back', this shouldn't be a surprise and I don't understand why you wouldn't want to have that conversation. If it's a safety issue, have the conversation over the phone or with someone else present.
  #3  
Old 06-24-2008, 09:24 AM
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Has he been violent in the past? Your post seems to hint at it. Don't hesitate to call the police if he gets violent and/or starts threatening you.

If he breaks things in the house out of anger that too is reason enough to call the police and get a restraining order against him. the message is "today I'll break you stuff... tomorrow it could be you."
  #4  
Old 06-24-2008, 10:50 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by marriageisrough View Post
The house is in my name only and I owned it prior to our marriage.

Also the mortgage payment was due a few days after he left and I was forced to pay it on myself (which wasn't easy). .
If this has always been your house and your mortgage, since BEFORE the marriage, why would his help be a big deal in making your (pre-marital) mortgage payment?
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  #5  
Old 06-24-2008, 11:04 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nextwife View Post
If this has always been your house and your mortgage, since BEFORE the marriage, why would his help be a big deal in making your (pre-marital) mortgage payment?

If he is living in the home than he should pay 'rent' or his portion of the household bills.

In any case the mortage is in her name and hence her responsiblity.
  #6  
Old 06-24-2008, 11:24 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nextwife View Post
If this has always been your house and your mortgage, since BEFORE the marriage, why would his help be a big deal in making your (pre-marital) mortgage payment?
Because this is Florida. After we had 4 or 5 hurricanes hit us in 2 years the insurance went through the roof and so have the property taxes. So it isn't so much the mortgage as it is the insurance and taxes.
  #7  
Old 06-24-2008, 11:28 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Farfalla View Post
If he is living in the home than he should pay 'rent' or his portion of the household bills.
That's not legal information. That's your opinion. Don't put your opinion out as some sort of legal standard.
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  #8  
Old 06-24-2008, 12:17 PM
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Location: Ohio
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Farfalla View Post
If he is living in the home than he should pay 'rent' or his portion of the household bills.

In any case the mortage is in her name and hence her responsiblity.
You are WRONG. Just wrong. So SHUSH.
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