property division of engaged couple

[lloydf]

What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state? Florida

I am Male. 35 years old. My fiancee is 24 years old. Engaged for 1 year. I have an 8 year old son from a previous marriage. Fiancee left 3 weeks before X-Mas and returned to her family in TN. She now plans on coming back on Tuesday to "take" her belongings. I don't have a problem with her taking what is hers but I can't lose my furniture and basic household items that I need to provide for the welfare of my son. Can I prevent her from taking these items until we can at least go to court to settle on our items that were purchased within our relationship?

 

[rmet4nzkx]

What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state? Florida

I am Male. 35 years old. My fiancee is 24 years old. Engaged for 1 year. I have an 8 year old son from a previous marriage. Fiancee left 3 weeks before X-Mas and returned to her family in TN. She now plans on coming back on Tuesday to "take" her belongings. I don't have a problem with her taking what is hers but I can't lose my furniture and basic household items that I need to provide for the welfare of my son. Can I prevent her from taking these items until we can at least go to court to settle on our items that were purchased within our relationship?

Why do you have to go to court, you are not married? It sounds as if the relationship is over and you are trying to prolong it and make life difficult for her.
You have known for 3 weeks so you have had time to replace anything that is hers that you need for your and your son's care.
How much of this was bought jointly?
Who moved in with whom?
How often do you have your child with you?
My son camped out with his daughter for several months waiting for furniture to arrive, it can be done and many places to pick things up inexpensively if you just have to replace some items.

 

[lloydf]

My son is with me full time, his mother lives in NY. I am a true Single parent. I am not trying to make anything difficult on her by no means. I'm talking about her plans to take things like the ktchen table the fridge the washer/ dryer and couch. She is welcome to take all of the appliances. wall hangings and such. Which is what I consider to be replacable. I just don't want my son to come home from his Xmas in NY with his mother and find the house gutted. I don't know who she is bringing with her to retreive the stuff that we disagree on but She just can't have everything. There has to be something I can do On Tuesday so I can at least feel that this done fairly.

 

[rmet4nzkx]

You didn't answer the questions.
Who moved in with whom?
Who had the items first or if bought together, who is paying for them?
Were any of these items yours exclusively before you moved in together?
Don't worry, children understand someone taking things that were their belongings very well.

 

[lloydf]

You didn't answer the questions.
Who moved in with whom?
Who had the items first or if bought together, who is paying for them?
Were any of these items yours exclusively before you moved in together?
Don't worry, children understand someone taking things that were their belongings very well.


My apologies for not answering your questions. I was merely focusing on what I felt you had misinterperted.

We both moved into a leased home together. neither of us are claiming to take any of our proprty that was exclusive prior to the relationship. Of the property that was purchased together if it were broken down to it's financial value. Then I what I am ok with her taking would be an even split. She simply intends to increase her share. I just want to know how I can protect us from being taken advatage of.

quote "Don't worry, children understand someone taking things that were their belongings very well."

I'm not sure if you have children but the mere fact that his mother figure is leaving him is obviously going to have an effect on him. All I am trying to do is ensure that we can manage in the future. Thanks for your responses.

 

[rmet4nzkx]

Please answer the questions?

 

[BelizeBreeze]

None of this matters one iota. The only thing that matters is who is on the lease. If she AND you are on the lease then yes, she can come back and take her belongings out. HOWEVER, there is no such thing as community property for couples not married, so if you don't want her to take something, there is no need for you to allow it.

 

[lloydf]

Well I was sure that I had but here it is again

Who moved in with whom? both in together

Who had the items first or if bought together, who is paying for them?
Income was 75% 25% in my favor. The things purchased by her on her shopping sprees she can have (decorations, art, jewlery, clothes etc.) All cash purchases. Joint accounts.

Were any of these items yours exclusively before you moved in together?
None of the items we disagree on. She can have what was hers and I can have what was mine

 

[lloydf]

Belizebreeze- Thats what I'm wondering. We both are on the lease. I just want to know what I can do from being basically stolen from I can't just physically sit on everything I need in the house to prevent whomever she brings with her from taking it out.

 

[LdiJ]

You still didn't answer the questions regarding who paid for the items that are in dispute. If she did, they are her property. If you did, they are your property. Its as simple as that. If they went on her credit card and they aren't paid off yet they are hers, and vice versa.

 

[lloydf]

Dude read the reply- NOT on credit. They were debited from our JOINT checking accounts. Or just paid in cash. Sometimes with both of our names on the receipt.

 

[LdiJ]

Dude read the reply- NOT on credit. They were debited from our JOINT checking accounts. Or just paid in cash. Sometimes with both of our names on the receipt.

That is one of the dangers of having a joint account when you aren't married. You can't prove who paid for what.

 

[lloydf]

Lesson learned- But can I prevent her from taking what I have an equal claim to?

 

[LdiJ]

Lesson learned- But can I prevent her from taking what I have an equal claim to?

It depends. If you are going to be home when she comes to get her stuff and are prepared to get the police involved if necessary, then yes, you may be able to stop her.

What items are actually in dispute? Maybe there is a better way around it.

 

[rmet4nzkx]

Now we can see what she was up against
You don't get to decide what she does or doesn't get, like she can have all the decorations and I get what I need/want everything else.
You two need to work it out, she can have some of the furnishings and you can have some of them and you can have some of the decorations also.
You are both entitled to your personal belongings and thngs you hade before you moved in together.
Just because you put in 75/25 doesn't mean that you control it, she may have put in other things and you had at least 66% of the expenses anyway.
As you said, she was fulfilling the role as Mother to your son, that has some value.
With your attitude you may make her want to take more than she might otherwise take.