Reconciling, what to do?

[coupleneedshelp]

What is the name of your state? NY

we have been separated for 3 years. we have a divorce case awaiting trial. we decided to get back together. we would like to dismiss the case. we are not sure what to do.

we have 3 questions?

1. can we just go to court and dismiss the case?

2. one lawyer (wife's) claims that he is owed $20,000 on the case. can he keep the case open to try to get the money from us, or does it become a new case in civil court?

3. the other lawyer (husband's) retainer agreement includes a clause that in case of settlement, he gets the whole $25000 retainer and doesn't have to return anything. he only earned (based upon his hourly rate) about $10000 so far. this was not supposed to mean if we decided to reconcile and dismiss the case, rather it meant if he worked out a settlement instead of going to trial (and saved the trial fees). what do we do?

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state? NY

we have been separated for 3 years. we have a divorce case awaiting trial. we decided to get back together. we would like to dismiss the case. we are not sure what to do.

we have 3 questions?

1. can we just go to court and dismiss the case?

Yes, but you would need to fire both attorneys first, if you want to dismiss it on your own.

2. one lawyer (wife's) claims that he is owed $20,000 on the case. can he keep the case open to try to get the money from us, or does it become a new case in civil court?

Has this been a really active case? That seems awfully high. No, he could not keep the divorce action going. He would have to go after the party civilly to collect the fees.

3. the other lawyer (husband's) retainer agreement includes a clause that in case of settlement, he gets the whole $25000 retainer and doesn't have to return anything. he only earned (based upon his hourly rate) about $10000 so far. this was not supposed to mean if we decided to reconcile and dismiss the case, rather it meant if he worked out a settlement instead of going to trial (and saved the trial fees). what do we do?

Why in the world did he agree to pay a 25,000 retainer for a divorce?..and why in the world did he agree that the attorney could keep the entire retainer if it wasn't used up? Did the attorney agree not to ask for more if the billable hours exceeded the retainer? Was this some hotly contested divorce? In any case, I honestly don't know whether or not he could keep the retainer. It would all depend on how the contract reads.

 

[coupleneedshelp]

thanks ldij for the fast advice.

can we get the lawyers to withdraw the case? what do we need to write them in a letter?

On the second point, I dont know how it got so high. my parents paid the lawyer and all the bills came to them. now theyre fighting me about this reconciliation. i dont know if the lawyer is in collusion with them. why would he ever have continued so deep in arrears. doesn't this seem fishy?

im not sure how my husband's legal retainer looks, but we'll look into it and try to find the troublesome clause and post it.

BTW, we were married for 20 years and have 5 kids

 

[LdiJ]

thanks ldij for the fast advice.

can we get the lawyers to withdraw the case? what do we need to write them in a letter?

Yes, the lawyers should withdraw the case for you, as your lawyers. However based on your second question it might be wiser to fire them and dismiss it yourselves.

On the second point, I dont know how it got so high. my parents paid the lawyer and all the bills came to them. now theyre fighting me about this reconciliation. i dont know if the lawyer is in collusion with them. why would he ever have continued so deep in arrears. doesn't this seem fishy?

Its very fishy that he let it get that high...and its even fishier based on the fact that your parents are so opposed to you reconciling.

im not sure how my husband's legal retainer looks, but we'll look into it and try to find the troublesome clause and post it.

BTW, we were married for 20 years and have 5 kids

I hope that everything works out for you.

 

[coupleneedshelp]

Yes, the lawyers should withdraw the case for you, as your lawyers. However based on your second question it might be wiser to fire them and dismiss it yourselves.

I feel that way, but what is it based on? what could the lawyers do if i send them a simple letter "please dismiss and cancel the cases". can they still mess us up?

Its very fishy that he let it get that high...and its even fishier based on the fact that your parents are so opposed to you reconciling.

Do you think my lawyer would work against me, and if so, what can i do about it?

 

[coupleneedshelp]

A new twist

now there is a new twist.

our daughter (3rd child, 14 years old) is against our getting together. she has been going over to my parents (i'm the wife) whenever my husband comes to the house.

now my lawyer says that the court-appointed law guardian is going to fight us on behalf of the children. is this possible?

what could we do to avert this?

all the children are currently in therapy and we are too

 

[cyana24]

https://forum.freeadvice.com/showthread.php?t=235169

I think there's more to this story - perhaps the "parent's" are correct in opposing reconcilation.