separation

[irishangel]

my dad separated from his wife 4 years ago,they are still married, but have no contact with each other .He is very ill at the moment.I have looked after him since then he now has dementia .Who will need to deal with the arangements if and when it happens?i know that he has a policy in which my step mum has?

[mistoffolees]

Originally Posted by irishangel

my dad separated from his wife 4 years ago,they are still married, but have no contact with each other .He is very ill at the moment.I have looked after him since then he now has dementia .Who will need to deal with the arangements if and when it happens?i know that he has a policy in which my step mum has?

Assuming he is in the US (you didn't say) he is married and his wife will have the ability to control almost everything. In addition, a large percentage of the property will automatically go to her (the percentage depends on the state).

He needs to see an attorney to get his affairs in order, including a will, health care proxy, and so on. He may also be better of if he files for divorce, but the attorney can tell him. However, since he has dementia, there are likely to be major problems. He will probably need a court ordered advocate to handle his affairs.

[Ohiogal]

Originally Posted by mistoffolees

Assuming he is in the US (you didn't say) he is married and his wife will have the ability to control almost everything. In addition, a large percentage of the property will automatically go to her (the percentage depends on the state).

He needs to see an attorney to get his affairs in order, including a will, health care proxy, and so on. He may also be better of if he files for divorce, but the attorney can tell him. However, since he has dementia, there are likely to be major problems. He will probably need a court ordered advocate to handle his affairs.

He can't do anything due to the dementia. The OP would have to follow for guardianship of dad due to his mental incapacity.

[mistoffolees]

Originally Posted by Ohiogal

He can't do anything due to the dementia. The OP would have to follow for guardianship of dad due to his mental incapacity.

Which is essentially what I suggested in the last part of that paragraph.

However, it's not so clear cut without a detailed medical diagnosis. 'Dementia' comes in lots of different forms and severity. The father may not be completely incompetent. However, the son needs to deal with those issues NOW by having the court either appoint a legal guardian or appoint him as guardian if the father is unable to do so himself. If the father's dementia is mild enough that he can still do some things for himself, he needs to take action, as well.

In any event, he needs to see an attorney ASAP.

[irishangel]

thanks for that . his dementia is widespread and he cant handle his own affairs .this is a mess

[mistoffolees]

Originally Posted by irishangel

thanks for that . his dementia is widespread and he cant handle his own affairs .this is a mess

Then you're going to have to see an attorney. You might be able to ask to become the legal guardian, but if his wife contests it, you'll probably have to settle for a court-appointed guardian.

[irishangel]

my dad has nt any estate or savings , he stays in a nursing home with little personal belongings, all i am worried about is when finally when the time comes he has a send off that was his wishes , which would be totally different from what my step mum would do