She said she filed papers, yesterday? Help!

[hope2change64]

What is the name of your state? Illinois

I could use some advice on what I should be doing since my wife told me yesterday that she filed papers for seperation and intends to follow with divorce papers.

She is unhappy with me, our new life in Illinois, 3 years, and wants out. I travel one or 2 nites per week and she told me her intention is to take our 3 kids, 14, 12 and 9 back to Ohio. She'll have family support there, but her family is a mess and her core friends are borderline criminal.

If she follows through with her intentions, how can I keep the kids in Illinois? She has told me that since I travel for my work, the court will allow her to take the kids to Ohio? What should I do right now to protect myself and my kids?

Any advice would be appreciated.

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state? Illinois

I could use some advice on what I should be doing since my wife told me yesterday that she filed papers for seperation and intends to follow with divorce papers.

She is unhappy with me, our new life in Illinois, 3 years, and wants out. I travel one or 2 nites per week and she told me her intention is to take our 3 kids, 14, 12 and 9 back to Ohio. She'll have family support there, but her family is a mess and her core friends are borderline criminal.

If she follows through with her intentions, how can I keep the kids in Illinois? She has told me that since I travel for my work, the court will allow her to take the kids to Ohio? What should I do right now to protect myself and my kids?

Any advice would be appreciated.

Ok...here is the situation. The judge cannot tell your wife where SHE must live. The judge can only order where the kids live. Therefore the judge must feel able to put the kids into your primary custody in order to legitimately order that they must remain in IL. Unfortunately, the fact that you must travel for work one or two nights a week puts you at a distinct disadvantage.

In addition, in IL the wishes of your two older children would be given some fairly signficant weight. The wishes of any child over 12 are written into the IL statutes as one of the "best interest" determining factors. (of course there are many other factors as well).

If your older children definitely want to stay in IL, and you could demonstrate a sound plan for the overnights that might increase your chances, but it wouldn't guarantee you a win.

However if they also want to go back to OH...then your chances further reduce.

If you were to decide not to oppose the move, you would be in a strong position to bargain for good visitation terms, for mom to be responsible for transportation, and perhaps even to get the judge to order that both houses maintain a high speed internet connection and webcams, so that you and the kids can see and talk to each other regularly over the internet.

Last but not least....if OH was originally home for both of you, any chance that you also agreeing to move back to Ohio could save your family?