spouse inheritance questions

[Christine050251]

What is the name of your state? someone please advise me so I don't worry about this!


Florida

I am sure I am not using this to post correctly but here goes. I guess someone will understand and I'll make this brief as possible.

my hubby and I have been married for 10 years and have a beautiful adopted daughter of 14months. I am 51 and he is 44.

I have excellent credit, and most everything is under my name.
His credit is awfull. It it my house, I'm on the deed and he on the morgage. ( by law ) I have borrowed many times on my credit cards and morgage to help him out, way up into the 40 K range!

I found out he was having an affair all of 2002. But I am trying to make the marriage work. It is very hard. He even made love to her in his parents bed many times while they were up north.
there is more, but I won't go into it.

here is the question and what can I do, and should I worry.

1. his parents are sickly and wanting to leave HIM a nice, free and clear duplex, maybe 2 duplexes if they build another before they pass. His dad wants it only in my husbands name. ( my husband agrees but tries to console me and tell me that he wants me on it) I can read between the lines, and my husband confesses, that in case I should leave him they don't want me to own any or be able to do
anything to get money out of my husband should we divorce. He owes me well over 40 K for bailing him out of failed businesses and even borrowing to keep the bills paid as he wasn't bringing in enough money to support the family as he had his "girlfriend" you see.

So should I be sweet and nice and try to get them to include me
and him in the will? or just because he inherits it and we are still lmarried it is mine also even though my name isn't on it. ( WE LIVE IN FLORIDA) I know that is the way they say my morgage works.

I do have 2 small home businesses and SHOW more money comming in than he does, even though he makes more.
I have been saving invoices to prove his income should need be some day.

2. Another question was, If I ( or attorney) write up and agreement between my husband and I or a "post nuptual", and list all he owes me and that he will not force me to sell my home in case of divorce, will that hold up if my husband signs it? I have had this house for 23 years and raised 3 kids in it. I don't want to have to sell it, nor do I feel I have to "buy him out" All the morgage checks are from MY checking account. We have nothing at all "joint" for fear of combining out credit.

Please I need some answers, I don't know what to do.

I am a Christian woman, homeschool and basically a nice person.
I am shocked at all this and want to protect my home and also get some of my money back to help pay down my morgage so I will be able to survive in case I should decide to divorce. I don't want to and will try not to but the hurt is unbearable.

In Christ,
Linda

 

[kat1963]

Linda;
You need to consult with a good family law attorney in your area. Most give free or low cost consults. Personally, I'd kick the bugger to the curb. Once a cheater, always a cheater.
To answer part of your question: Florida is an equitable distribution state, meaning each spouse can retain their non-marital property. Non-marital property includeds: Property acquired prior to the marriage. Acquired by gift or inheritance. Any property that the spouses agree is non-marital property by written agreement.

Best of luck to you!

KAT

 

[Christine050251]

thanks for the info., but...

Is an inheritance on his part after being married for ten years considered ( oh I forgot the terms you used!) "what we had before marriage" or "accumulated after marriage" or "just his" and I can't touch it as I'm not on the morgage or deed for the duplexes? ( this is a added note after all is written: the duplexes will be in a corporation between his father and my husband. This probably "screws" ( sorry ) me I'm sure )


I asked him this morning if for my peace of mind, drew up some notes on what he owed me for "getting him out of fixes" numerous times, PLUS 1/2 of my credit card debt, (cards in my name) would be OK with him. He wants to make the marriage work and said "sure". Should I hurry and get that done before he changes his mind or would the courts do that anyway?

I had a court order for my X to pay on some of my cards ( see below ) and he didn't and almost ruiled my credit if I had not caught it. The CC company said it was my name on the card and what the courts said did not concern them

Back to present husband Joe:
I thought in florida, if he worked and lived at "my" home, and married, he automatically, even if he was not on the deed, the home was 50% his. I was told this was florida law when I refinanced the house. he is NOT on the deed, but the morgage as I had no choice. His credit and earings were not considered in the loan. I solely got the load on my own.

Should I be suggesting anything to him when he talks to his dad about the "will" that could leagally put me on the duplex, but yet, sound as if I'm not trying to "have an ace in the hole?"
ONE VERY IMPORTANT THING I FORGOT TO MENTION: he and his dad decided to put the duplexes in a "corporation" for tax purposes.( yea right, thats only part of it I"m sure )
I don't think it would be considered something we gained together while married if it was inherited and in a corporation.
If I owned "shares" would that help and how many shares?


the only reason I'm trying to make this work, and it's not love ( maybe alittle) is this: With a 14 month old it is hard for me to do
alot of yard work, forget major fixing ( plus the cost ) and she needs her daddy.

"I" am embarassed to even tell anyone about this, even though it's not my fault. No one knows and has his "good guy" image to everyone. He totally got away with this for a year!!!

I can not make the bills myself.

I homeschool the kids- last one just graduated and getting married soon. Next I will have to start with the baby for many years, which I enjoy.

My 19 and 23 year old daughters love him and think he is the greatest Christian man. A role model. When they have problems in their marriage, they work at it because they think we are happy and Joe is the perfect husband. If they find out, then, well, in their minds, "hey, there are no decent men". Me staying with Joe gives them incentive to work things out in their own marriage. They want what "mom has"

Joe's father ( 74 with lots of "parts" ) is the
only one that knows about it as I made joe tell him. He was all "poor Joe".

I am a confident, nice looking woman. I just don't want to start over again. I was married for 18 years, my 3 kids father ( not the baby, she is adopted at one day old) started drinking more and popping pills and probably sleeping around. I left him for the kids sake. I did in no way have the dept I have now.
My son at 16 went with his dad and the girls, 8 and 12 were with me. The oldest gave me alot of problems and finally went to live with her dad, which made the grass look alot greener on his side.
Now she is my best friend.

I really don't want to go through that again, but don't want to get "taken" to the cleaners. I need to know what to do to prepare in advance "should" he cheat again, I'll have everything
documented, signed or whatever.

I was thinking if these duplexes are in the corporation when his dad passes and they are only in Joes name, can he take a morgage out on them and pay me? Or could I write in this legal document that he "will" morgage the duplexes and pay me in full?
Any thoughts? Read all my posts and see what you would do.

I was extremely glad to see your email this morning as I feel it supports me and gives me some strength.

there are attorneys in our area but alot go to out church and they all know each other...etc....even if they don't, the word will get around. I would have to go "way" out of town to get advise.