Suing a suspected mistress

[tealhawk]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? North Carolina


My parents are in the seperation process after news of my fathers suspected affair with one of my former teachers came to light. My mother wants to sue the woman for alienation of affection but I'm worried that there isn't enough evidence despite an extensive and tell tale phone record and her finding the woman in my father's apartment just two months after she moved out. A recent confession to my mother about an outing may indicate that I may have been involuntarily involved in said affair. I have knowledge of a few other outings that took place where I was not present but my sibling was. I have not revealed these yet as I am worried that it will endanger his relationship with either parent in the event that he must testify. Although I am of age and currently not on speaking terms with my father I still feel like my mother is taking a large risk with this lawsuit and I don't know what to do. Any advice?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

 

[JETX]

My mother wants to sue the woman for alienation of affection but I'm worried that there isn't enough evidence despite an extensive and tell tale phone record and her finding the woman in my father's apartment just two months after she moved out. A recent confession to my mother about an outing may indicate that I may have been involuntarily involved in said affair. I have knowledge of a few other outings that took place where I was not present but my sibling was. I have not revealed these yet as I am worried that it will endanger his relationship with either parent in the event that he must testify. Although I am of age and currently not on speaking terms with my father I still feel like my mother is taking a large risk with this lawsuit and I don't know what to do. Any advice?

NC is one of the very few states that still allows such a tort claim. If your mother is even considering taking this action (and there are a LOT of issues that must be considered), she will clearly need a local attorney. I suggest she start there.

Also, for more:
Alienation of Affection

 

[cyjeff]

If mom had already moved out, alienation of affection is off the table.

Mom would have to prove that this affair turned a loving marriage into a divorce.

As stated above, there are several other variables here.

I recommend strongly against getting involved in your parents' divorce. If you get involved, all that will happen is that one of your parents will hate you.

 

[mistoffolees]

If mom had already moved out, alienation of affection is off the table.

Mom would have to prove that this affair turned a loving marriage into a divorce.

As stated above, there are several other variables here.

All true. When meeting with an attorney, I'd ask when the last alienation of affection suit was won in NC - and I'll bet it was quite a while ago or a lot more obvious situation. Under this scenario, winning seems unlikely.

I recommend strongly against getting involved in your parents' divorce. If you get involved, all that will happen is that one of your parents will hate you.

I agree. However, there's also the chance that one parent will hate OP for NOT getting involved.

Best bet is to steer Mom to an attorney who will hopefully talk her out of pursuing the matter.

As for you, it may be helpful to know what would happen if you are asked to testify. You can testify only to things you've actually seen in most cases (there are exceptions to the hearsay law-for example, you could typically testify to conversations with your father even if you didn't see whatever it is you talked about since he's a party to the case). You would probably not be able to testify to what your siblings told you. You may decide that it's not useful to discuss anything with either parent unless you actually witnessed it. That may help to keep you off the hook.

 

[ShyCat]

All true. When meeting with an attorney, I'd ask when the last alienation of affection suit was won in NC - and I'll bet it was quite a while ago or a lot more obvious situation. Under this scenario, winning seems unlikely.

Actually, there was a big judgment awarded just recently.

Woman wins 'alienation of affection' case - UPI.com

 

[mistoffolees]

Actually, there was a big judgment awarded just recently.

Woman wins 'alienation of affection' case - UPI.com

I stand corrected. Still, in the case you are citing, the mistress apparently was the cause of the marriage breakup. In the OP's case, that doesn't appear to be true.

Also, given the magnitude of the award, I'd venture that there was a small army of lawyers handling the case. OP wants to go after a schoolteacher - who isn't going to be able to pay enough to even cover legal fees, in all likelihood.

 

[nextwife]

Going after the sex partner of a cheater always seemed misplaced to me. The person that ignored their commitment to the spouse is the one that is at fault. No cheating could occur without their cooperation.