• FreeAdvice has a new Terms of Service and Privacy Policy, effective May 25, 2018.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our Terms of Service and use of cookies.

uncontested divorce, but complicated by military and pregnancy

Accident - Bankruptcy - Criminal Law / DUI - Business - Consumer - Employment - Family - Immigration - Real Estate - Tax - Traffic - Wills   Please click a topic or scroll down for more.

totalimpact

Junior Member
State: Cali.

I have been seperated from my wife of 2 years for a few months, and we have been meaning to get a divroce, but her being away in the military has kind of delayed it. We are still good friends, and in complete agreement as far as our future and assets. The thing that has caused a major problem is her since becoming pregnant with another man.

The navy would see this as adultery and would punish her, after some research she found out she could spend a month or more in the brigg, loose rank and a lot of pay. We both agreed that wouldnt be good. If she stays married to me and nothing is said the baby will be born with my name and I will sign the birth certificate - this is what I dont want. If I divorce her they will want a paternity test to verify who the real father is before the birth certificate can be signed, and they will find out what really happened.

My first question is: is there anyway to keep my name off the child and not get her into big trouble with the Navy. (I think the answer is no)

Second: If I get the divorce after the child is born - how long will this take?

Third: should I file a legal seperation right now, and will this in anyway cause need for a paternity test.
 
Last edited:


LdiJ

Senior Member
totalimpact said:
State: Cali.

I have been seperated from my wife of 2 years for a few months, and we have been meaning to get a divroce, but her being away in the military has kind of delayed it. We are still good friends, and in complete agreement as far as our future and assets. The thing that has caused a major problem is her since becoming pregnant with another man.

The navy would see this as adultery and would punish her, after some research she found out she could spend a month or more in the brigg, loose rank and a lot of pay. We both agreed that wouldnt be good. If she stays married to me and nothing is said the baby will be born with my name and I will sign the birth certificate - this is what I dont want. If I divorce her they will want a paternity test to verify who the real father is before the birth certificate can be signed, and they will find out what really happened.

My first question is: is there anyway to keep my name off the child and not get her into big trouble with the Navy. (I think the answer is no)

Second: If I get the divorce after the child is born - how long will this take?

Third: should I file a legal seperation right now, and will this in anyway cause need for a paternity test.
I understand that you don't want to get her into any trouble with the military, but for goodness sake...you can't accept paternity of a child that is NOT yours....even temporarily. Its not your fault that she got pregnant, and you have to let her deal with the consequences of her actions.

However, I am also pretty sure that if you make no issue regarding the adultery, (don't file any complaints with the military)....that they are likely to turn a blind eye to things. I could be wrong, but this is what I have been told.
 

totalimpact

Junior Member
LdiJ said:
However, I am also pretty sure that if you make no issue regarding the adultery, (don't file any complaints with the military)....that they are likely to turn a blind eye to things. I could be wrong, but this is what I have been told.
- Can anyone confirm this - should I post this in the military law section?

and I know - its her fault, but I'm just too much of a "nice guy".
 

Kane

Member
LdiJ posted a thread earlier that you might want to look at.

Basically, it said if you accept paternity - or for that matter, even fail to contest it - you could be stuck with child support until the child turns 18. Regardless of whether it's yours or not.
 

rmet4nzkx

Senior Member
If the child is born of the marriage in California it is considered yours and you have 2 years in which to contest or disestabish paternity. Most states don't do a DNA test if she is married, however, the state in which she gives birth will determine some aspects of paternity.
 

rmet4nzkx

Senior Member
Kane said:
rmet - two years starting when?
See CA Family Code 7646 (essentially 2 years from father's knowledge of the judgement, in the case of husband birth, if he is aware of the birth.)
 

Nocgirl

Member

totalimpact

Junior Member
I simply need an answer to my first question, I know how to get a paternity test, I can simply divorce her right now, and that will force a test when the child is born, this is not what I am asking about.

Is there anyone that has any experience with military law?
 

rmet4nzkx

Senior Member
totalimpact said:
I simply need an answer to my first question, I know how to get a paternity test, I can simply divorce her right now, and that will force a test when the child is born, this is not what I am asking about.

Is there anyone that has any experience with military law?
Here is a link to the requirements for both regular and sum**** dissolusions (Divorce) http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/selfhelp/family/divorce/divforms.htm
A definative answer requires more facts than you have given so perhaps this link will help you, then if you have remaining quesitons you can post them on the military forum.
 

Kane

Member
rmet4nzkx said:
See CA Family Code 7646 (essentially 2 years from father's knowledge of the judgement, in the case of husband birth, if he is aware of the birth.)
Thank you.
 

totalimpact

Junior Member
Unfortunately I already have access to this info, I have a lawyer who knows all about divorces and paternity, but for some reason he has no resources on the military retrobutions that my wife may incur.

I am only trying to figure out if she will get in trouble if I divorce her and deny paternity prior to the childs birth - this is my only question.

I dont want to just jump into this and find out the effects after doing everything, if she needs to be prepared to go to jail, we would like to know that.

I have received no reply from my post in the military section, I guess I will need to look elsewhere.
 

Nocgirl

Member
You probably cannot divorce her pregnant. You can file, I doubt the divorce will be finalized since she is pregnant and DNA cannot be comfirmed until after the birth.

Do you not have access to JAG? A civilian attorney can also help you.
 

rmet4nzkx

Senior Member
totalimpact said:
Unfortunately I already have access to this info, I have a lawyer who knows all about divorces and paternity, but for some reason he has no resources on the military retrobutions that my wife may incur.

I am only trying to figure out if she will get in trouble if I divorce her and deny paternity prior to the childs birth - this is my only question.

I dont want to just jump into this and find out the effects after doing everything, if she needs to be prepared to go to jail, we would like to know that.

I have received no reply from my post in the military section, I guess I will need to look elsewhere.
We cannot tell you what will happen at the military level in advance anymore than we can tell you how a judge will rule. That being said, we have a member badapple40 who is a military attorney and he will answer you in time, it has been a holiday weekend and may regular members have been otherwise occupied, all are volunteers.

I gave you the link because I don't have the facts to determine if you qualify for a summa-ry divorce, if you do and your atty should be able to tell you that, the pregnancy may not be an issue in civil court, you would be granted your divorce with leave to contest paternity. When the baby is born you would file to contest paternity within the 2 year limit, she will agree and then the issues with biodad can be addressed, by then your divorce will be a matter of fact with the military and if there are no child support orders they likely won't do anything.

Now what she does insofar as her family plan for guardianship is another story she will have to address. If biodad or someone informes on her, she may get in trouble. Now do you see why no one can give you a definative answer?

If you have to use the standard dissolution, the length of time required to process the divorce could complicate her military issues because most divorces take longer than 6 months, so the child would be yours according to CA law.

I don't see any way you are going to get out of contesting paternity, the question is when and no later than filing the contest under CA Family Code 7646 before the child is 2 years old or within 2 years of learning of the child's birth.

Have you informed your attorney that she is pregnant? If you know and don't include the pregnancy in the papers, then it is fraud, as opposed to her not telling you, which would be a different story.

If she has family, it would be best if she made them the guardian in case she is deployed or death.

She has another option is she is enlisted and not an officer on a contract, hardship dischaege. Then there woul dbe no question re paternity or violaiton of UCMJ.
 

Find the Right Lawyer for Your Legal Issue!

Fast, Free, and Confidential
data-ad-format="auto">
Top