wait for temporary court orders?

[st paddy]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CA

I've been out of the house since December. During this time, I've given my wife money to pay the bills, but I have found out recently she didn't pay the mortgage or keep up the home & car insurance & spent it on HSN & QVC instead. I caught the insurance up and am and was able to pay enough to the mortgage company, so now I am only one month behind instead of 3. She's told anyone who will listen I didn't give her any money, although I have the bank statement that says different. . An attorney I consulted with told me I basically threw away my money and that it will be considered "a gift". I am finished providing "gifts" when the mortgage is not being paid. My question is, should I wait for a temporary spousal support order or should I give her more money next time I am paid? I'm worried that if I don't the judge won't look kindly on me. By the way, she's a student..has been for over 10 years (kept changing her mind on what she wanted to do) and so she does not work.

 

[mistoffolees]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CA

I've been out of the house since December. During this time, I've given my wife money to pay the bills, but I have found out recently she didn't pay the mortgage or keep up the home & car insurance & spent it on HSN & QVC instead. I caught the insurance up and am and was able to pay enough to the mortgage company, so now I am only one month behind instead of 3. She's told anyone who will listen I didn't give her any money, although I have the bank statement that says different. . An attorney I consulted with told me I basically threw away my money and that it will be considered "a gift". I am finished providing "gifts" when the mortgage is not being paid. My question is, should I wait for a temporary spousal support order or should I give her more money next time I am paid? I'm worried that if I don't the judge won't look kindly on me. By the way, she's a student..has been for over 10 years (kept changing her mind on what she wanted to do) and so she does not work.

I wouldn't give her money directly. Pay the mortgage, if necessary. Then, put some money aside into a savings account in your name so you have some cash set aside in the unlikely case that the judge orders you to pay her retroactively.

Why is it taking so long for temporary orders? Did anyone even request them?

 

[st paddy]

Why is it taking so long for temporary orders? Did anyone even request them?

Thanks for the advice. I don't think she's requested temporary spousal support. I don't know if I should tell her to request it or let her do it when she realizes she isn't getting any money from me this month.

 

[mistoffolees]

Thanks for the advice. I don't think she's requested temporary spousal support. I don't know if I should tell her to request it or let her do it when she realizes she isn't getting any money from me this month.

That's entirely up to you. There is no legal obligation for you to look out for her interest, but if you feel morally obligated to do so, then go ahead and remind her.

In general, spouses who are divorcing are best off if they look after their own affairs or have an attorney or other third party on their side. Relying on your stbx to look out for you isn't usually going to be very wise.