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  #1  
Old 09-24-2009, 03:42 AM
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Where/how/what do I file this under?


What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? ILLINOIS

Trying to avoid long and complicated detail....

Our divorce was made final 2 years ago; and as of now an Order of Protection exists against me from seeing my daughters, and custody was transferred to their father.

My ex husbands new wife has become their primary caretaker.

Through her own statements, (appx 100 of them on a public internet site) she makes herself appear alcoholic, states that she won't give up the bottle though she needs to, and frequently refers to "getting loaded" while caring for my children, and has now also begun making terrible comments about them, stating they are terrible monsters and pathological liars, and how she wants to send them away.

She also states that she is their only mother, and brags about how to steal a husband and take the kids without repercussions or getting arrested. I'm not kidding, though I wish I was.

Due to the existence of the Order of Protection against me, I cannot protect them, nor advise their father as to what is occurring; though he is an abuser, and would probably care less.

I need to file an temporary restraining order or injunction to stop her from drinking while around my kids as well as stop her from making bad comments about them in such a public light.

My question is, CAN I file something to stop her from these behaviors, and if so, do I file it under our divorce case or do I start a new one in regards to her?

I'm Per Se and cannot afford an attorney; they have unlimited funds (literally) and a law firm behind them, and Pro Bono places in this area cannot help me, though I've tried several times.

Thank you so much....ANY response would be appreciated. I feel like I've run out of options. ;(
  #2  
Old 09-24-2009, 03:53 AM
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In my opinion in your situation, I would try to gather some hard evidence that this person or person(s) are neglecting your children or putting them in danger. Since you have an order of protection against you then this is going to be difficult. You stated that she appears an alcoholic. What do you mean by that? I think patience in your situation is going to be the best call. Without proper evidence I do not think anything is going to happen personally. But if you feel strong heartedly that these children are being neglected or anything like that I would contact your local police department with your concerns and see what they can do for you.
  #3  
Old 09-24-2009, 04:32 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by michelle2932 View Post
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? ILLINOIS

Trying to avoid long and complicated detail....

Our divorce was made final 2 years ago; and as of now an Order of Protection exists against me from seeing my daughters, and custody was transferred to their father.
What led up to this?

(Yes, it's important)

Quote:
My ex husbands new wife has become their primary caretaker.

Through her own statements, (appx 100 of them on a public internet site) she makes herself appear alcoholic, states that she won't give up the bottle though she needs to, and frequently refers to "getting loaded" while caring for my children, and has now also begun making terrible comments about them, stating they are terrible monsters and pathological liars, and how she wants to send them away.
Can you prove - outside of the website - that she is doing this and represents a threat to the children? Alcoholism does not in itself equate to a threat to the children.

Quote:

She also states that she is their only mother, and brags about how to steal a husband and take the kids without repercussions or getting arrested. I'm not kidding, though I wish I was.
People make idiotic statements online - though yes, she is out of line stating that she is the only mother.

(as long as your rights haven't been terminated you are the ONLY Mother)

Quote:

Due to the existence of the Order of Protection against me, I cannot protect them, nor advise their father as to what is occurring; though he is an abuser, and would probably care less.
You have no proof of what is or isn't occuring though. What's Dad's history in terms of the abuse?

Quote:

I need to file an temporary restraining order or injunction to stop her from drinking while around my kids as well as stop her from making bad comments about them in such a public light.
Highly unlikely. How do you know the children are being adversely affected?

Quote:

My question is, CAN I file something to stop her from these behaviors, and if so, do I file it under our divorce case or do I start a new one in regards to her?

I'm Per Se and cannot afford an attorney; they have unlimited funds (literally) and a law firm behind them, and Pro Bono places in this area cannot help me, though I've tried several times.

Thank you so much....ANY response would be appreciated. I feel like I've run out of options. ;(
She doesn't seem to have actually done anything to warrant any action on your behalf.

Why can't you talk to Dad about it?
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  #4  
Old 09-24-2009, 04:41 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by justsomecop View Post
In my opinion in your situation, I would try to gather some hard evidence that this person or person(s) are neglecting your children or putting them in danger. Since you have an order of protection against you then this is going to be difficult. You stated that she appears an alcoholic. What do you mean by that? I think patience in your situation is going to be the best call. Without proper evidence I do not think anything is going to happen personally. But if you feel strong heartedly that these children are being neglected or anything like that I would contact your local police department with your concerns and see what they can do for you.
I have tried that! But thank you. =) The only hard evidence I have is his wife's public posts...which also include her full name, but as I understand civil rules of evidence may be less stringent than criminal. As far as she "appears to be alcoholic", I put that to avoid libel charges, should it come into light at some point. But literally. appx 50 of her statements involve alcohol/drinking/moonshine/ hangovers.

DCFS will not help, and have told me that it sounds like I am making things up amid a custody dispute. Frustrating, to say the least. Yes, though I know they are supposed to investigate, life does not always work as it should.

The existing Order Of Protection has made things difficult, as anyone I go to for help has a pre-conceived notion that I must have somehow done something wrong. Though it was due to my failure to properly issue a Response, I come out being the "bad guy". In reality, I'm just trying to protect my girls the only way I can.
  #5  
Old 09-24-2009, 04:47 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by michelle2932 View Post
I have tried that! But thank you. =) The only hard evidence I have is his wife's public posts...which also include her full name, but as I understand civil rules of evidence may be less stringent than criminal. As far as she "appears to be alcoholic", I put that to avoid libel charges, should it come into light at some point. But literally. appx 50 of her statements involve alcohol/drinking/moonshine/ hangovers.
None of which are or illegal or inherently dangerous to a child's welfare.

Quote:
DCFS will not help, and have told me that it sounds like I am making things up amid a custody dispute. Frustrating, to say the least. Yes, though I know they are supposed to investigate, life does not always work as it should.
That's the thing - you didn't offer proof.

Quote:

The existing Order Of Protection has made things difficult, as anyone I go to for help has a pre-conceived notion that I must have somehow done something wrong. Though it was due to my failure to properly issue a Response, I come out being the "bad guy". In reality, I'm just trying to protect my girls the only way I can.
What led up to that Order of Protection?
__________________
*****************************


When you can't bear something but it goes on anyway, the person who survives isn't you anymore; you've changed and become someone else, a new person, the one who did bear it after all.
— Austin Grossman

Quote:
Salagadoola mechicka boola bibbidi-bobbidi-boo
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