who gets the kids

[lonelymom2009]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? arizona
I am the sole provider in my household. husband does not work, and refuses to because of where we live. he says i won't get custody of my children because I don't cook (which is not true) or clean (again not true), is he at all correct. I have family here as a support system to help if I need it. what do I do

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? arizona
I am the sole provider in my household. husband does not work, and refuses to because of where we live. he says i won't get custody of my children because I don't cook (which is not true) or clean (again not true), is he at all correct. I have family here as a support system to help if I need it. what do I do

If your husband has been the primary caretaker of the children, then he would have an edge for custody. Whether you have been cooking or cleaning is mostly irrelevant. So, does he care for the children while you work?..and how long has that been going on?

Also, please close the other thread you started and ask your other question on this thread. Keep all of your questions on one thread.

 

[mistoffolees]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? arizona
I am the sole provider in my household. husband does not work, and refuses to because of where we live. he says i won't get custody of my children because I don't cook (which is not true) or clean (again not true), is he at all correct. I have family here as a support system to help if I need it. what do I do

It comes down to what is in the best interest of the children. It is generally advantageous for the kids to have as little change as possible - and they are currently mostly cared for by their father. OTOH, having family as a support system helps.

Your cooking and cleaning abilities are largely irrelevant. You need to be able to ensure a safe, healthy home for the kids. The court couldn't care less whether you cook a meal, your mother does so, or the baby sitter does it for you.

Bottom line, is what can you do to prove that the kids would be better with you than with the father? Unless the father is unfit for some reason, your best hope is joint custody - it would be hard to justify taking the kids away from the father if he's a decent father, but it COULD be argued that joint custody is better for the kids than spending all their time even with a good parent.