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Wife delaying divorce

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private8x

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?California

6 months ago wife separated and stated she wanted divorce, now she no longer returns calls or messages and will not file the paperwork. She wanted the divorce so she should file and pay, but how can I legally force her to carry out her wishes. Has she caused "pain and suffering" here... sure feels that way. Any advice or do I just have to hire a lawyer?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
 


Ohiogal

Queen Bee
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?California

6 months ago wife separated and stated she wanted divorce, now she no longer returns calls or messages and will not file the paperwork. She wanted the divorce so she should file and pay, but how can I legally force her to carry out her wishes. Has she caused "pain and suffering" here... sure feels that way. Any advice or do I just have to hire a lawyer?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
you cannot force her to file a divorce. So you file and ask the court to order her to be responsible for reimbursement of your court costs in addition to all the other relief you are requesting.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
you cannot force her to file a divorce. So you file and ask the court to order her to be responsible for reimbursement of your court costs in addition to all the other relief you are requesting.
Although I cannot imagine why a judge would order her to pay his court costs. At this point he is the one who wants the divorce.
 

Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
Although I cannot imagine why a judge would order her to pay his court costs. At this point he is the one who wants the divorce.
Sounds to me like she may have been the one to move away...
 

xylene

Senior Member
She wanted the divorce so she should file and pay, but how can I legally force her to carry out her wishes.
You know filing for divorce is not free, but the court costs is not that expensive either...

You are both agreed to divorce and it is an easy uncomplicated divorce yes?

You sound a little wrapped up in a matter of essentially a few hundred dollars.

Are you destitute? Otherwise it seems like you are holding yourself hostage to your punitive feelings.

Pay the money and leave this behind.
 

private8x

Junior Member
First off, thanks for the responses, I truly appreciate all the info I can get. She is the one who stated in counseling that she did not want to resolve our differences, then moved out of our apartment leaving me with an exorbinant rent. Obviously, I don't wish to remain in a marriage that my spouse doesn't want, so I suppose technically it's mutual, but the divorce was her idea and I don't think I should have to pay for it- if nothing more than as a matter of principle. No I am not "destitute", but I'm an active duty soldier living in one of the most expensive cities in the world, even the $300 online packages are not in my budget so it's a practical matter as well. At this point I don't think I could afford court costs even if the judge did order reimbursement... everyone knows how little we civil servants make. So I guess there really is no legal solution if I can't pay. Seems I'm just at her mercy until she quits playing mind games and files??? That doesn't make any sense.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
First off, thanks for the responses, I truly appreciate all the info I can get. She is the one who stated in counseling that she did not want to resolve our differences, then moved out of our apartment leaving me with an exorbinant rent. Obviously, I don't wish to remain in a marriage that my spouse doesn't want, so I suppose technically it's mutual, but the divorce was her idea and I don't think I should have to pay for it- if nothing more than as a matter of principle. No I am not "destitute", but I'm an active duty soldier living in one of the most expensive cities in the world, even the $300 online packages are not in my budget so it's a practical matter as well. At this point I don't think I could afford court costs even if the judge did order reimbursement... everyone knows how little we civil servants make. So I guess there really is no legal solution if I can't pay. Seems I'm just at her mercy until she quits playing mind games and files??? That doesn't make any sense.
Again, there is no way to force someone to file for divorce.
 

CourtClerk

Senior Member
Regardless of who FILES, what the other people who have answered you neglected to tell you is that BOTH of you would have incurred court costs anyway...

so file. Get it over with. You weren't getting through this for free anyway.
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
CC's right. You'd both have fees to pay, regardless of who files. Seems silly (to me) to dig your heels in on this. Save a bit from each paycheck, and then file if she hasn't.

Talk to your landlord and see if there's a chance of finding someone to take the apartment so you can move somewhere more cost-efficient.
 

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