Will the restraining Order cost him his job?

[sondeez]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Georgia

i have a restraining order against my husband. he did serve me with divorce papers but i had to force mediation because he said he would not mediate until i dropped the Restraining Order and would also prolong the divorce. we have 5 children together 2 of which still live at home and at our preliminary trial the judge order also that he pay child support. He know claims I violated the restraining order and is taking me to court to have it dropped and says that unless i drop the Order he will fight for custody of the children as well. He's also requesting that i lower the child support which i won't do- the child support and restraining order were ordered by the same judge at the same time and i don't want to lose either. He(the almoset x husband) states that he will lose his security clearance if i don't drop the Order and then i will get nothing. I guess one of my questions is - is that statement true? will he lose his security clearance and therefor his job ?

[cyjeff]

Depending on the security clearance that he has, it is certainly possible.

[Gracie3787]

Originally Posted by sondeez

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Georgia

i have a restraining order against my husband. he did serve me with divorce papers but i had to force mediation because he said he would not mediate until i dropped the Restraining Order and would also prolong the divorce. we have 5 children together 2 of which still live at home and at our preliminary trial the judge order also that he pay child support. He know claims I violated the restraining order and is taking me to court to have it dropped and says that unless i drop the Order he will fight for custody of the children as well. He's also requesting that i lower the child support which i won't do- the child support and restraining order were ordered by the same judge at the same time and i don't want to lose either. He(the almoset x husband) states that he will lose his security clearance if i don't drop the Order and then i will get nothing. I guess one of my questions is - is that statement true? will he lose his security clearance and therefor his job ?

I just answered on your other thread. Please do not double post, and please delete or close your other thread.

What is your husband's occupation?

If you are concerned about him paying CS, losing his job will certainly affect that.

Unless he truly presents a real physical danger to you, you might want to reconsider dropping the RO to prevent his loss of income.

[Ronin]

Restraining orders in one form or another are common in divorces and remain in effect until the divorce is finalized. This is a civil rather than a criminal matter. Although some of the verbiage of restraining orders may sound ominous, much of it is par for the course in divorces. This in contrast to Protective Orders which is a whole different ballgame.

While a protective order could easily cost him his security clearance, restraining orders pursuant to a divorce is probably nothing to lose sleep over. Even if you withdrew your restraining order, it does not undo the fact that it was made, and that it is a matter of record. As these things go, if he makes a big issue out of this he could sink his own ship by attracting unwanted attention to an otherwise inocuous matter.

Don't be intimidated by empty threats of losing custody and child support if you do not concede to his demands.

[mistoffolees]

Originally Posted by Ronin

Restraining orders in one form or another are common in divorces and remain in effect until the divorce is finalized. This is a civil rather than a criminal matter. Although some of the verbiage of restraining orders may sound ominous, much of it is par for the course in divorces. This in contrast to Protective Orders which is a whole different ballgame.

While a protective order could easily cost him his security clearance, restraining orders pursuant to a divorce is probably nothing to lose sleep over. Even if you withdrew your restraining order, it does not undo the fact that it was made, and that it is a matter of record. As these things go, if he makes a big issue out of this he could sink his own ship by attracting unwanted attention to an otherwise inocuous matter.

Don't be intimidated by empty threats of losing custody and child support if you do not concede to his demands.

This is all premised on the very dubious assumption that nothing would happen to him.

First, many people use 'restraining order' when they mean 'protection order'. Therefore, there is some chance that she really IS referring to a protection order in which case she really could lose any ability to collect child support if she pushes the matter. That is NOT an empty threat.

There is no sign in the post that she feels that her life is in danger in any way. That would be consistent with your hypothesis that it's not a protection order. But if that's the case, there's no reason for her to keep it in place, endangering his employment.

It's really quite simple. If she is in danger, the order should remain in place. If she is not in danger, she doesn't need it and there's no point endangering his job.

[LdiJ]

Originally Posted by mistoffolees

This is all premised on the very dubious assumption that nothing would happen to him.

First, many people use 'restraining order' when they mean 'protection order'. Therefore, there is some chance that she really IS referring to a protection order in which case she really could lose any ability to collect child support if she pushes the matter. That is NOT an empty threat.

There is no sign in the post that she feels that her life is in danger in any way. That would be consistent with your hypothesis that it's not a protection order. But if that's the case, there's no reason for her to keep it in place, endangering his employment.

It's really quite simple. If she is in danger, the order should remain in place. If she is not in danger, she doesn't need it and there's no point endangering his job.

I sincerely agree with the bolded...assuming that she doesn't decide to make the decision purely on finances...ignoring real danger.

There are so many cases of multiple people (including children) ending up dead. Its so hard to know what is right to do.

[Ronin]

Originally Posted by mistoffolees

This is all premised on the very dubious assumption that nothing would happen to him.

First, many people use 'restraining order' when they mean 'protection order'. Therefore, there is some chance that she really IS referring to a protection order in which case she really could lose any ability to collect child support if she pushes the matter. That is NOT an empty threat.

There is no sign in the post that she feels that her life is in danger in any way. That would be consistent with your hypothesis that it's not a protection order. But if that's the case, there's no reason for her to keep it in place, endangering his employment.

It's really quite simple. If she is in danger, the order should remain in place. If she is not in danger, she doesn't need it and there's no point endangering his job.

Its really not all that dubious.

If she really does have a protective order against him, then dropping one that has already been granted will do little to minimize its potential impact on his security clearance. The damage would already have been done. Furthermore, if it really is a protective order, it is not her decision to end it when she chooses. That is unless she admits she lied to obtain it, which would not be a good thing for her.

If it is a standard divorce restraining order with some strong anti harassment type clauses in it, that still does not even closely rise to the same level as a protective order. In the context of a divorce proceeding it would probably be little cause for concern with a security clearance. I have direct experience with high level security clearances and understand how these things work.

[Salivander]

Originally Posted by sondeez

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Georgia

i have a restraining order against my husband. he did serve me with divorce papers but i had to force mediation because he said he would not mediate until i dropped the Restraining Order and would also prolong the divorce. we have 5 children together 2 of which still live at home and at our preliminary trial the judge order also that he pay child support. He know claims I violated the restraining order and is taking me to court to have it dropped and says that unless i drop the Order he will fight for custody of the children as well. He's also requesting that i lower the child support which i won't do- the child support and restraining order were ordered by the same judge at the same time and i don't want to lose either. He(the almoset x husband) states that he will lose his security clearance if i don't drop the Order and then i will get nothing. I guess one of my questions is - is that statement true? will he lose his security clearance and therefor his job ?

My STBE works in the security field and carries a weapon. I had to get an Order of Protection against him and he was suspended THAT DAY without pay pending investigation. He also had told me in the past that any domestic charge, be it a Restraining Order, or even worse, a domestic violence arrest, would immediately put him on unpaid suspension and possible termination pending an investigation by his company. Well, any arrest actually. But I think he said a domestic assault charge would be an immediate termination. Well, whatever it was, yes, it can most definitely affect his employment. Especially if he has to carry a weapon of any sort.

[SIN EATER]

Originally Posted by Ronin

Restraining orders in one form or another are common in divorces and remain in effect until the divorce is finalized. This is a civil rather than a criminal matter. Although some of the verbiage of restraining orders may sound ominous, much of it is par for the course in divorces. This in contrast to Protective Orders which is a whole different ballgame.

While a protective order could easily cost him his security clearance, restraining orders pursuant to a divorce is probably nothing to lose sleep over. Even if you withdrew your restraining order, it does not undo the fact that it was made, and that it is a matter of record. As these things go, if he makes a big issue out of this he could sink his own ship by attracting unwanted attention to an otherwise inocuous matter.

Don't be intimidated by empty threats of losing custody and child support if you do not concede to his demands.

If she filed a domestic violence allegation as the basis for the RO, then his security clearance is down the toilet. Also, if he has a job where he carries a gun, he is probably out of commission entirely.
I think you're confusing the standard restraining orders in all divorces regarding financial movement of money, property and children, with domestic violence restraining orders. Huge difference.

[mistoffolees]

Originally Posted by Salivander

My STBE works in the security field and carries a weapon. I had to get an Order of Protection against him and he was suspended THAT DAY without pay pending investigation. He also had told me in the past that any domestic charge, be it a Restraining Order, or even worse, a domestic violence arrest, would immediately put him on unpaid suspension and possible termination pending an investigation by his company. Well, any arrest actually. But I think he said a domestic assault charge would be an immediate termination. Well, whatever it was, yes, it can most definitely affect his employment. Especially if he has to carry a weapon of any sort.

Then OP will have to make a decision as explained above.

If you feel that you are in danger, then you need the protection order. If you feel that you are NOT really in danger, then the protection order may cost him his job and you can kiss child support goodbye. Further, depending on the length of your marriage, you could be paying spousal support.

[Salivander]

Originally Posted by mistoffolees

Then you have to make a decision as explained above.

If you feel that you are in danger, then you need the protection order. If you feel that you are NOT really in danger, then the protection order may cost him his job and you can kiss child support goodbye. Further, depending on the length of your marriage, you could be paying spousal support.

I'm curious, though. In your first post, you asked: "will he lose his security clearance and therefor his job ?"

Why did you bother asking if you already knew that he was suspended the very day you filed the order?

I think you are confusing me and the OP.

[mistoffolees]

Originally Posted by Salivander

I think you are confusing me and the OP.

You're right. Sorry.

[Ronin]

Bottom line is if OP actually has a Protective Order against her ex it is not her decision to make it go away whenever she feels there is no longer a threat.

If it is a divorce Restraining Order, then OP has not provided enough information to make any assumptions that this will negatively impact a security clearance. Generally speaking such orders by themeselves are not a big deal. Any potential issues arising from this would be scrutinized beyond any allegations made or implied in the orders themselves.

Well meaning opinions from relatives of security guards and others who have not personally held a high level security clearance on whether or not a clearance "is down the toilet" don't mean a heck of a lot.