Bogus restraining order

[Rondo442]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CA

After dating a woman for about three months, she decided to break things off through an email. She was obviously not answering her phone when I made several attempts to contact her for an explanation. I sent her a text telling her what I thought about her for doing things that way, yes harsh words, but not even close to being abusive.

We had several items of each others’ belongings and I made several attempts through email, text and voice message to make arrangements to exchange our things. Finally, a mutual friend acted as a go-between to exchange our things without having to see each other, although I had no problem seeing her, I just wanted my things back. I got them back, and walked away from the situation, with no intent toward further contact from that day forth.

Four weeks later I was personally served at my place of employment with a Final Domestic Violence Restraining Order that expires in a year. On that order, it states that a hearing was held four days prior that I was totally unaware of. The order also states that Proof of Service for the TRO and hearing date was filed with the court, which is obviously fraudulent because I was never served anything.

Question 1: Does this even have any validity as a DV order since we never lived together, and only saw each other four to five times a week, for three months? In which time, I never treated her with any manner of abuse; mental, emotional, physical or otherwise. I never even so much as called her a name or raised my voice to her.

Question 2: How do I contest the bogus Proof of Service that was filed in court?

Question 3: It has come to my attention that she is trash-talking about me on her facebook page, still telling everyone that I am harassing and stalking her (I’ve made no contact in almost five weeks) and how she’s going to ‘take me down’ and so forth. Her friends are also responding to her posts with threats of physical violence against ME. Are FB postings valid evidence in court when I file for a restraining order against her? (I have printed copies of them) She is not behaving like someone who is afraid for her safety, but is carrying out some kind of vendetta. I feel that I need to protect myself.

Question 4: How can I protect myself from her filing a false report with the police saying that I violated the order? I wouldn’t put it past her to do so, in fact, I almost expect it now.

How do I proceed? I don’t need this over my head. Thank you for any help!

 

[justalayman]

Question 1: Does this even have any validity as a DV order since we never lived together, and only saw each other four to five times a week, for three months? In which time, I never treated her with any manner of abuse; mental, emotional, physical or otherwise. I never even so much as called her a name or raised my voice to her.

it sounds like a bogus claim but due to the relationship if it was legit, yes, a DV order could be proper. It is based on the relationship, not the living arrangements.

Question 2: How do I contest the bogus Proof of Service that was filed in court?

you file to contest the order based on ineffective service. I don't know how it claims you were served but the requirements for service can be pretty loose.

Question 3: It has come to my attention that she is trash-talking about me on her facebook page, still telling everyone that I am harassing and stalking her (I’ve made no contact in almost five weeks) and how she’s going to ‘take me down’ and so forth. Her friends are also responding to her posts with threats of physical violence against ME. Are FB postings valid evidence in court when I file for a restraining order against her? (I have printed copies of them) She is not behaving like someone who is afraid for her safety, but is carrying out some kind of vendetta. I feel that I need to protect myself.

freedom of speech allows a lot and it appears she has not made any specific threats so you don't have a claim.

Question 4: How can I protect myself from her filing a false report with the police saying that I violated the order? I wouldn’t put it past her to do so, in fact, I almost expect it now.

keep a log of your actions, where abouts, and witnesses to show her report to be untrue.

 

[CdwJava]

I sent her a text telling her what I thought about her for doing things that way, yes harsh words, but not even close to being abusive.

Unwanted or threatening electronic communications can be a misdemeanor crime in CA (PC 653m).

Question 1: Does this even have any validity as a DV order since we never lived together, and only saw each other four to five times a week, for three months?

Even being in a dating relationship will allow it to be classified as a DV TRO.

In which time, I never treated her with any manner of abuse; mental, emotional, physical or otherwise. I never even so much as called her a name or raised my voice to her.

Apparently she said otherwise in her affidavit and later at court.

Question 2: How do I contest the bogus Proof of Service that was filed in court?

Hire an attorney. I do not know how you can re-open the matter to contest it without using an attorney.

Question 3: It has come to my attention that she is trash-talking about me on her facebook page, still telling everyone that I am harassing and stalking her (I’ve made no contact in almost five weeks) and how she’s going to ‘take me down’ and so forth. Her friends are also responding to her posts with threats of physical violence against ME. Are FB postings valid evidence in court when I file for a restraining order against her?

You can try. A court may or may not accept them as proof of any threats to do you harm. A comment to take you down is not necessarily a physical threat as it can have a number of meanings.

Are you going to tell a judge that you fear for your safety because her Facebook postings? Merely posting lies or tall tales is not enough to get an order ... though it might be enough to sue her for libel if you can articulate damages.

Question 4: How can I protect myself from her filing a false report with the police saying that I violated the order? I wouldn’t put it past her to do so, in fact, I almost expect it now.

Make sure you do not have unaccounted for time, if you can. In other words, try to have an alibi for most of your time - preferably with credible witnesses to back you up. She's not likely to claim you violated the order if she can't be sure where you are or who you are with.