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Can a Order of Protection be cancelled in TN?

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Ohiogal

Queen Bee
1. NO disparaging remarks by either parent about either parent in front of the child.
Hard to enforce.

2. NO disparaging remarks by any visitor to any household about either parent.
Visitors are NOT parties to the court order and thus can not be held to it. Try this even though hard to enforce: Neither parent shall or shall allow any other person to speak disparaging about the other party.

3. Local AGREED upon drop off/pick up point for child to avoid any contact between parents.
If you have to agree then you have to have contact. Name a place -- heck, the police station, the local McDonald's parking lot -- somewhere public that is open at dropoff times.

4. Another manner of communication between parents other than phone or face to face conversation when issues of the child are in need of discussion (letter?)
Communication log -- a notebook with pockets sent at every exchange that has all information regarding the child (appointments in the next week, school papers, allergies, when the child last ate/diaper change/medicine dose, etcetera) included and written in. Such log should be dated and signed by the informing parent and initialed as read by the receiving parent.


5. STICK to the Parenting Plan in place in regard to all aspects (visitation, holidays...etc)
Is the parenting plan a court order -- if so then it is an order. However you cannot force someone to exercise visitation and if he is violent what do you think FORCING him to exercise visitation is going to do. And if he is not following it in other ways then you take him back for contempt. You do NOT use a restraining order hearing to do so. Oh and you don't have to agree to do anything other than what is in the parenting plan.

6. Both parents agree to deliver and pick up child from all school functions that he MUST attend (band related) on their respective visitation schedule.
That is a parenting plan item and NOT a restraining order hearing.

7. NO arguing or bad language from either parent in front of the child.
You want the court to regulate maturity? Language? Is crap considered bad language? What about the following words: sucks, wench, whore, slut, frack, OPP, penis, vagina, clit, balls?
Because a court is NOT going to legislate such things -- the whole first amendment thing. You know -- the CONSTITUTION!

Have I left anything out or is there anything else I should request or discuss?
Please help quickly...my court date is 9/19.
This is a restraining order hearing correct? What you want to address is how to keep you safe and from being abused -- anger management for him, counseling, those type of things. But the only one of the above that is appropriate is the neutral drop off point. The rest are parenting and maturity issues.
 


LdiJ

Senior Member
Since the child is 14, they can avoid contact between the parents pretty easily.

Neither parent is to exit their car at the exchange point.
 

not2cleverRed

Obvious Observer
Have you contacted your local battered women's shelter? They may have access to resources to help you. See if you qualify for legal aid.

I really don't like the idea of you going in without legal representation - since your husband might.

DO document the harassment that you've received from your in-laws; if the verbiage about using intermediaries is not in the current OP, ask that it be added.

DON'T remove your son from the OP. Given your husband's overreaction to the OP, I suspect it's there for good reason - I understand anger in his situation, but when one gives way to "cussing" at school officials or police or court officers, one is showing a lack of self control.
 

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