Op, I am not attacking you. I just think you SO don't understand the seriousness of this situation. Not even close.
WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO SAY?Agreed. I was speaking of your advice that this will all blow over if she keeps her mouth shut.
Not necessarily true.
It's not always that easy.
I would be scared, were I him. Moreso were I her and had done what she has done.
You didn't know that lying to the police and breaking the law was serious? Oh that is nice.I Did Not Realize How Serious The Situation I Was Getting Myself Into Really Was At The Time.
Anywhere. Home. Nowhere. Don't care.I Dont Really Know What To Do, Or Where To Go.
You are a disgrace to all women who are actually abused. The judge's secretary is NOT legally allowed to give you any advice. The DA can pursue charges against you. Testification? How about testimony -- that is the proper word that educated people use. The DA can pursue. They can subpoena you. If you don't show up, they can put a warrant out for your arrest. Whether they will do that is a choice they will make. And quite frankly if I could find your DA's office I would more than happily send your thread to them to show what kind of liar they are dealing with and this could help convict you.I Called The Court House, The Judge's Secretary Advised Me Not To Say I Made A False Report Because They Will Bring It Up, She Instead Advised Me To Go To The Da's Office And Tell Them I Was Not Going To Testify In Court. She Then Explained To Me( What The KimNY Was Sayin) Wihout My Testification, Or Any Evidence ( Even With Pictures) The Da Wont Really Have Much To Pursue.
Not always. Think murder victims. Usually there is NO victim testimony at all.The Main Key To The Prosecution Is The Victims Testimony.
Yes they do. They have you. Who made a complaint. They can use that against you. They can subpoena. They can force your butt into court.In The Case They Do Not Have One.
Could but no guarantees.They Will Have To Wait And See If Anything Else Happens, But Will Most Likely End Up Having To Dismiss The Case Altogether.
You don't want him to do time but you dont' want to tell the truth. You are a disgrace and quite frankly, you are making it that much harder for women that have actually experienced abuse. You are selfish, vindictive, vengeful and quite frankly you deserve to spend some time in a cell thinking about it. Any problems? You created the problems.I Am Very Scared, I Don't Really Know Where To Go, Or What To Do. I Hope When I Go On Mon. She Is Right. I Don't Want Him To End Up Doing Time, I Just Want To Move On Without Any Problems On My Shoulders.
That you could be facing charges and you can be forced to testify. If you do testify that he did something then you are looking at committing a felony. So you would either have to admit to breaking the law while on the stand or you would have to commit a felony and send an innocent person to jail because you are immature. Jeez. This is not over yet.WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO SAY?
You said yourself you don't live in MA. I did. I saw first hand what happens in courtrooms when a man is accused of domestic violence and where evidence or lack thereof is irrelevant. The judges don't want the defendant to turn into the next Ted Bundy and get the judge's name in the newspaper. Being held on high bail with no evidence and a recanting, uncooperative or blatantly untruthful witness is commonplace.I think OP means me, and thank you. My abuse is real which makes it more serious to me,
so I'm just going on experiance. not technical legal education, I have been represented by a wonderfull public defender in the past and I just dont think it needs to go as far as incriminateing herself.
But I dont live in MA (i think thats where she said she was) so my personal knowledge might possibly only apply to me, but I doubt it. All DV cases start out picke dup by the state but without the cooperaton of the complainant/victim (for whatever reason she doesnt want to cooperate) I dont think the DA will persue it too far.
You said yourself you don't live in MA. I did. I saw first hand what happens in courtrooms when a man is accused of domestic violence and where evidence or lack thereof is irrelevant. The judges don't want the defendant to turn into the next Ted Bundy and get the judge's name in the newspaper. Being held on high bail with no evidence and a recanting, uncooperative or blatantly untruthful witness is commonplace.
BUT AFTER HE MAKES BAIL, OR HE GETS HIS SECOND HEARING AND STILL THEY HAVE NOTHING, THEY LET HIM GO, WITH COURT DATES, ORDER OF PROTECTION, AND WAIT TO SEE WHAT TURNS UP BEORE THEY HAVE TO DROP THE CHARGES, OR GET HIM TO PLEA DOWN. (IN NY, IN MY SITUATION, EVERYTIME. )
Bottom line, there is the law as its written and then there is the law as its applied. Quite honestly telling OP that her man needs a lawyer is true. However it might not be enough and even if he is exonerated in the end, I for one would not be too thrilled for having dealt with the whole unnecessary and highly stressful process in the first place, something you seem to have missed.
Can I ask you WHY you made those false allegations? Not that your reasons are an excuse.I understand now why the state is prosecuting, is there any chance that I might be able to expalin to a judge that I made false allegations on the defendant.
This is ridiculous. So, if someone "pisses a chick off" he/she deserves to be painted with the brush of dv?Finally, in respect to the guy in the situation, thats what he gets. I'm so sure he is not innocent, and he really hurt this girl to have gone thru all this trubble, because hes so wonderful. And if not so bad,at verry least he learned a lesson to stay away, or dont piss off this chick, and like I said , Life lessons are just as valuable as expencive schooling not everyone is lucky enough to be privlage to. So what he doesnt like it. hes not innocent and better watch his steps while the DA is trying to make a case against him.
This is ridiculous. So, if someone "pisses a chick off" he/she deserves to be painted with the brush of dv?
You can't mean that.
Can you?!!!
Lady, the BF WILL have a record even if the case is dropped or he is acquitted. Arrest records in Mass are governed by CORI. The mere fact of his court appearance is on his public record and he won't be able to get the case sealed on his record unless he can demonstrate actual harm to him such as actual denial of a job or an apartment. What if he was held in jail on bail? What if he has to pay attorney fees? Your comment about a life lesson to HIM is asinine. If HE did nothing wrong in the first place, why is HE the one going through anxiety and legal problems?Well in this case I believe he is not innocent, and may deserve the innoyance of court dates, and maby they all need to grow up. (at the very least) Learn a lesson, bring some positivity to the situation.
And yes,depending on the degree of *pissed off* it can be concidered abuse. I get pissed off when hubby doesnt come home and I find that to be part of the abuse, I get pissed off when bills are unpaid its left totally to me to pay and I do this all the time, again part of the abuse. I get pissed off when I feel or find out that he is cheating on me, again part of the abuse,. so im going to go with yes,. I do mean that. in my case and the limited posting of this case,.
Some women get pissed off but dont connect it with emotional / financial./ mental abuse so I generalize that if a woman is pissed off enough to file a false report, there is something very wrong.
Sorry, Not like it will be on his record as DV if the case is dropped. Just a life lesson to both Poster and Posters boyfriend.
Ps she claims she found he was sleeping with a number of other women, yea, thats abuse especially if he was leading her to believe something else. She just reacted alittle irrationally. Shes young yet, she'll learn.