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Falsely Accused/Falsely Indicated

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Tiff30

Guest
i am from NY state. on may 28th, i checked on my 18 month old daughter before going to bed at 1:30am. when i awoke at 7:30am, she was not in her bed, and we couldn't find her. i called our local police to help me, fearing my ex husband had come and abducted her. luckily, she was sound asleep under her bed, apparently having crawled under there to reclaim her binky in the night and fell asleep against the wall on the far side. neither the officer nor i had seen her way back there when we'd looked. because her room had 2 piles of clean clothes and a pile of stuffed animals on the floor, mind you they were in no way obstructing the bed, the officer filed a child abuse report against me for unsafe environment. the investigator came to my home and informed me that i have a lovely home, and my children are well taken care of. i heard nothing for 2 months. she then came back to my home yesterday and informed me that she was closing the case as indicated due to "inadequate supervision" because we had not been able to find her for an hour. now, she was simply asleep under her bed. they call it an unfortunate accident, yet i am being called indicated for inadequate supervision. she crawled under her bed and went to sleep. now this goes on my record, which affects my future possibilities of becomeing a certified daycare provider, my future job opportunities, and my character as a parent and a childcare provider.i know that i can fight the decision,which i do plan on doing, but is there any kind of a suit i can file against the organization of defamation of character. this is a ridiculous situation, i am the mother of 4 children, and my daughter crawled under her bed and fell asleep! please help me
 


Jeter

Member
What is so simple about enabling an 18 month old child enough access that she can crawl into a place in which she couldn't be found by the entire family?? So much so that you'd have to call in the police? What if her head got caught between the bedpost and the wall? If anything is ridiculous, that is.


Inadequate supervision sounds about right to me, sorry to say.

Jeter
 
T

Tiff30

Guest
To Jeter and Humor me.........do either of you have children? My god, you're responses are ridiculous! I in no way enabled my child to crawl under her bed. First off, I have no reason to defend myself to either of you. I asked to receive advice from someone who knows something, not to be criticized for an incident that most parents would never even consider happening. I also have NEVER heard of a parent thinking to "barrackade" there child's bed so that she could not crawl under it! I am not at all inexperienced as a parent. I have 4 children, and know how to take care of them. The child did not fall out of bed, duh.....she has a side rail.......she simply crawled out and crawled under the bed to find her binky that she had lost. There was no way for her to get stuck under there, there was no way to be injured. Seeing that she has 3 much older siblings.....she has become a very deep sleeper, seeing as she goes to bed before everyone else, and with 3 older kids there is always somekind of noise.....and she slept through us calling her. My god, the police officer even looked under the bed and didn't see her because she was back against the far wall. I in no way am looking here for "comments, opinions, or rudeness", I am searching for some responsible answers from someone that knows something!
 
D

deefran

Guest
Tiff30, I completely agree with you
1.-you checked on your child prior to going to bed (how can you be supervising a child in the middle of the night?)
2.-whether beds or cribs MANY children have been known to find their ways out of them (when my daughter was 11 months old she used to climb the sides of her crib and drop to the floor to retrieve her binky, which we call a "ninny" I had to put her in a toddler bed in fear that she would give herself a concussion one day)

You should contact a lawyer ASAP and explore all legal avenues to appeal the final decision.

To Jeter, accidents happen ALL the time with children, can you tell me how you would have prevented what happened to this woman? Her daughter was NOT hurt nor was she in any immediate physical danger. How could this be construed as abuse??? And HM I have read alot of your posts and am a little shocked by your response. She got off light?? The charges should have been dropped. How about both of you trying to stay up ALL NIGHT to supervise children??
 
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Tiff30

Guest
Deefran......Thanks so much for your vote of confidence. I was needless to say quite taken aback by the other two responses. I have contacted an attorney, and also the news stations in my area, and I might say that they are also very interested in helping me. It's nice to know that there are people out there that can take the time to look at a situation for what it was, and really, I don't even consider it an accident, lol, my daughter simply did what many children her age do, she just happened to fall asleep under there and not hear my calls. Also, just to let you know, I find it very interesting that upon learning that I had contacted the media, they are now "reviewing" the situation before making a "final, final" decision! Seems to me that if they were so certain of there assessment they wouldn't need to be reviewing things. Certainly makes you think twice about a) calling for help, and b) the power that our "system" gives people. Anyway, again thanks for the support!
 
M

moneygame_u_bet

Guest
Judges, there everywhere!!!!!

Get'm folks!, I read the posts by jeter and humor me and I agree with how ridiculous they sound. They sound like da couple of
ed-u-cated physco-therapists, or lawyers? History does repeat itself, our legislators are falling back in time with some of the ridiculous charges they are putting on folks. What do they want, complete mayhem?. As far as getting a lawyer you would be far better using the media to draw attention to your issue than getting dragged through a backed up system that does not know what to do with these things they call issues, or maybe themselves. Don't get me wrong, laws are a good thing but when you are unaware of doing something wrong you should not be punished in such a harse way, please educate!!!!
This is becoming the downfall of what used to be a great nation, we have become spoiled and forgot about thy neighbor.
Sorry!, I get pissed at folks with narrow minds who cannot comprehend the WHOLE picture. God Bless and good luck!, Next time you may want to call someone who can help call on JESUS.
I thought the police were to SERVE and PROTECT?. I know jeter thinks differently, it soundS like jeter thinks they have something better to do. jeter is wrong!, they did exactly here what they do anywhere they HARASS!!!! and INSTAGATE rather than keeping the PEACE and SERVING. I guess our TAX money is not enough that they need to make a little extra $ stirring up false charges, WHY you say - BECAUSE THEY CAN.
Again good luck, stay cool under the gun.
Later!:
 
H

HumorMe!

Guest
Cute...

:eek:

This is funny. I actually strongly disagree with deefran and only acknowledge that there was a point to the post. The site I posted has been very helpful to many people.

Personally, I believe you did everything right in this instance and as I previously stated, I believe the caseworker erred. As did some of the other posters. :p

You got off light becuase social services (by whatever name they go by) can destroy you and your children for nothing. Not because you did anything. I am keenly aware of the over-zealousness, inadequacies and bumbling of these agencies which is why I tend to caution those who might call them.

HM

HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHOM TO MARRY?
You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming. - Alan, age 10

HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?
You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids. - Derrick, age 8

WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?
Both don't want any more kids. - Lori, age 8

WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?
Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough. - Lynnette, age 8

WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?
When they're rich. - Pam, age 7

IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?
It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them. - Anita, age 9

HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?
There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there? - Kelvin, age 8

HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?
Tell your wife that she looks pretty even if she looks like a truck.- Ricky, age 10
 
M

moneygame_u_bet

Guest
Thanks for clearing the air!

I do not understand what you COMPLETELY disagree with in deefrans post?, do you not have children of your own?.
There are two points, jeters and tiff30's - it's up to none of us to pass judgement. Some of us go to college to learn theory and some of us go to HARD KNOCKS to learn reality, then some profit from it!.
From what I read into these posts there are alot of theories, lets get real!.
I also would like to know if the posts by the 7 to 10 year olds something to live by?. I would have to wonder if they are kids of single parents for the way they think at such a young age.
please advise of their status.
 

LegalBeagle

Senior Member
HM made a mistake in her last post, she obviously meant that she disagreed with Jeter and not deefran as stated.

As regards to HM first post, it is also obvious what was stated.

"Jeter has a point"

Jeter had a point about the danger the child could have been in.

"I believe the investigator may have erred in judgement here."

The overall conclusion by the investigator was wrong.

"Ont he other hand, it appears you got off light. "

Considering how many parents have their children taken from them and are dragged through court despite doing nothing wrong, our poster got off light in view of the initial charge.

The biggest mistake here was not completely, 100% checking for the child before calling the police. Under the bed should have been one of the first places to look.

To answer our posters original question about suing for "defamation of character", the answer is no. Your hands are going to be busy getting this charge off your record, don't even waste your time with a very expensive libel action.
 
D

deefran

Guest
I just have something to ask everyone, has there ever been a day when you were stressed, panicked etc. and there was something or someone that you were searching for and due to your state of mind EVEN if the thing you were searching for was right in front of your face you DID NOT see it? Happens to the best of us. I am in no way implying that anything posted has been right or wrong. If I were perfect I could judge, but I'm definitely not (perhaps close LOL, yeah right LOL). I AM saying however, that Tiff30 should definitely look into having the charges dropped from her record.
 
H

HumorMe!

Guest
Oops!

Thanks LB! I must be slipping! lol

Sorry for the confusion!

HM

P.S. Deefran, LB is right. Whether or not it is with in the range of "normal" or not does not matter when dealing with an out of control government agency. I roll my eyes when I hear about abuses by the IRS. They are nothing compared to what numerous other agencies play with! In a perfect world, we could call the police the instant we
thought something was wrong and not worry about the consequences for doing what any good parent would do.
 
D

deefran

Guest
What scares me is that I actually called CPS when I found out my ex-friend was smoking pot and blowing it in her 8 month old's face to calm them down from crying. The child continuosly smelled of reefer and when the baby was seriously ill the mother was afraid to take him to the hospital, because she was afraid to have them do a blood test on the baby (knowing full well they'd find marijuana in his system) You know what CPS told me? That I had to prove it!! I said," Kinda thought that would be YOUR job!" They never investigated it by the way. The baby is almost a year now and a cute chunky little guy (must be the munchies), when I last saw him he had a nasty smoker's cough. Yet, when my sister scraped her leg pretty badly, and couldn't remember how she did it (she's 12, a tomboy who has about 3 million scrapes and scratches from bball, scooter, bike) A teacher questioned her about it, when she couldn't remember what happened, teacher called CPS, thinking sister was covering for Mom. CPS immediately removed sister (sent her to me) and questioned my Mom for days...finally realizing there were no grounds for charges. So you decide, do they know their a##e# from holes in the ground? And that my friends was my vent for the day...I will now return you to your regularly scheduled lives.
 
C

crystal2

Guest
Deefran- One of my friends used to live down the street from my husband's ex. My friend was on her way home one day when she saw my 19 month old stepdaughter running around outside in her diaper with no adults in sight. The baby ran right for the street, was on the sidewalk when a neighbor came out of her apartment and grabbed her. Found out later mom was in her apartment putting away groceries. I called CPS and they said that they would have to "catch her in the act" to do anything.

Another time mom drove to our house, put the baby over our fence, tossed the diaper bag over and was two houses down when she stopped and honked. As soon as our door opened, she drove away, leaving the baby standing there in the yard crying. We called the cops and they said "It sounds like she was trying to avoid a fight by doing it that way".

If that's not some bull****, I dont know what is.
 

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