Father doesn't pick up our daughter on visitation days but sends other people

[keondra28]

I have a temporary protective order against me for fighting with my daughter's father which is fine with me to avoid anymore conflict. I have not violated the order in anyway and have brought a 3rd party with me everytime we have to exchange our daughter for visitation. In a month in a half he has not come to pick up our daughter but sends his mother, his mother's boyfriend or complete strangers- both our consent order and the protective order states that he must be present but he doesn't show and I don't know if he is actually visiting with our daughter. My question is this ; can I file a motion of contempt for him not being present to pick up our daughter without violating any stipulations pertaining to the Temporary Protective Order?

 

[Isis1]

I have a temporary protective order against me for fighting with my daughter's father which is fine with me to avoid anymore conflict. I have not violated the order in anyway and have brought a 3rd party with me everytime we have to exchange our daughter for visitation. In a month in a half he has not come to pick up our daughter but sends his mother, his mother's boyfriend or complete strangers- both our consent order and the protective order states that he must be present but he doesn't show and I don't know if he is actually visiting with our daughter. My question is this ; can I file a motion of contempt for him not being present to pick up our daughter without violating any stipulations pertaining to the Temporary Protective Order?

you could. but with that protective order they will only revise it. he will not be forced to be present since he fears you. and apparantly with good cause.

the judge will assign a third party for child exchanges. he won't be found in contempt.

 

[stealth2]

I have a temporary protective order against me for fighting with my daughter's father which is fine with me to avoid anymore conflict. I have not violated the order in anyway and have brought a 3rd party with me everytime we have to exchange our daughter for visitation. In a month in a half he has not come to pick up our daughter but sends his mother, his mother's boyfriend or complete strangers- both our consent order and the protective order states that he must be present but he doesn't show and I don't know if he is actually visiting with our daughter. My question is this ; can I file a motion of contempt for him not being present to pick up our daughter without violating any stipulations pertaining to the Temporary Protective Order?

Does your PO allow you to be in the same vicinity as him when the child is exchanged? If not, he is doing you a favor by not being there. Because otherwise, you'd be in contempt.

 

[Sheriff10]

I have a temporary protective order against me for fighting with my daughter's father which is fine with me to avoid anymore conflict. I have not violated the order in anyway and have brought a 3rd party with me everytime we have to exchange our daughter for visitation. In a month in a half he has not come to pick up our daughter but sends his mother, his mother's boyfriend or complete strangers- both our consent order and the protective order states that he must be present but he doesn't show and I don't know if he is actually visiting with our daughter. My question is this ; can I file a motion of contempt for him not being present to pick up our daughter without violating any stipulations pertaining to the Temporary Protective Order?

Please tell me THAT is not true!! If you send your child with complete strangers, OR he sends them, neither of you should have custody. Surely you know who you are sending your child with!!

 

[Just Blue]

Please tell me THAT is not true!! If you send your child with complete strangers, OR he sends them, neither of you should have custody. Surely you know who you are sending your child with!!

Mom doersn't have to know these people. Dad does.

 

[Sheriff10]

Are you kidding me!!??

I don't care who sent them. Anyone who sends their children anywhere with COMPLETE strangers is negligent, at best. The court would never expect you to send your children with people YOU don't know.

Besides, if he is required to be present at pickup, why let him off the hook when you don't have to?

 

[Just Blue]

Are you kidding me!!??

I don't care who sent them. Anyone who sends their children anywhere with COMPLETE strangers is negligent, at best. The court would never expect you to send your children with people YOU don't know.

Besides, if he is required to be present at pickup, why let him off the hook when you don't have to?

Please...What experience do you have with Child Custody Laws?

 

[Sheriff10]

None. I never claimed to.

How about you?

Whether there is law to support your contention or not, there is also common sense. If my ex sent someone I did not know to pickup my child, legal or not, they don't get him.

Do you have legal precedent to support your position or is it only your opinion?

 

[CdwJava]

My question is this ; can I file a motion of contempt for him not being present to pick up our daughter without violating any stipulations pertaining to the Temporary Protective Order?

Sure. You can tell the court he is not present and they will either sanction him or modify the order to reflect his fear of you,if that is indeed the reason for his absence.

Then what? As was mentioned, the court will likely allow for him to send a person of his choosing to make the pickup if he is concerned for his welfare around you.

What is your motivation in this? Do you REALLY think there are strangers kidnapping your child and taking them to God knows where? Or, is this about control and manipulation?

In the end the court will almost certainly permit a third party arrangement even if they might sanction him for not appearing as the court order specifies for the moment. His bad for not going back to modify the order. But, if you expect him to go to jail over this, you are likely to be sadly mistaken.

 

[Proserpina]

None. I never claimed to.

How about you?

Whether there is law to support your contention or not, there is also common sense. If my ex sent someone I did not know to pickup my child, legal or not, they don't get him.

Do you have legal precedent to support your position or is it only your opinion?

This is not about what you perceive as common sense - it's about the law.

Unless a court order provides that BOTH parents MUST personally know each and every person sent to pick up the child, then either parent can send - basically - whoever they want.

But honestly, this is so easily rectified it's not even funny.

Ask Dad (even via a third party) to provide a name, physical description, and the license plate number of the driver of whoever is picking up kiddo every time it's Dad's turn for visitation.

Or OP can do what Carl said, too!

 

[Sheriff10]

This is not about what you perceive as common sense - it's about the law.

Unless a court order provides that BOTH parents MUST personally know each and every person sent to pick up the child, then either parent can send - basically - whoever they want.

But honestly, this is so easily rectified it's not even funny.

Ask Dad (even via a third party) to provide a name, physical description, and the license plate number of the driver of whoever is picking up kiddo every time it's Dad's turn for visitation.

Or OP can do what Carl said, too!

The OP said, in this case, that the court order required the father to be present when the child was to be picked up. Even without that, unless you can prove that the law says different, I do not believe the court expects a parent to give their child to complete strangers.

If the order specifically states that either parent can send ANYONE to pick the child up, that would be different.

I agree with your easy solution though.