first offense

[mybrood]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Illinois
I'm writing this on behalf of my husband he can't type so I'm doing it for him.

My stepson's mom slapped him several times and left bruises on the entire right side of his face and scratches down both sides of his ears, bruises on the back of his neck, and a black eye. DCFS was contacted by the police when my husband reported it after we got him this weekend. When we got him the boy looked awful and we did take pictures of his face. DCFS did come the next day and speak with him and look at him. They said it looked like a handprint on his face. Mom told the police that her 3 year old was responsible that he hit my stepson (who is 7) with a flyswatter. Sunday Mom told DCFS that she hit the boy with a flyswatter. She said she was trying to hit his butt and he moved and got his face in the way. DCFS told Dad he had to return son to Mom. They said it was her first offense and there probably wouldn't be much done. DCFS met with Mom and all 3 sons on Monday. Mom says that everything went great and the only thing she got in trouble for was having a lighter on a shelf where they kids could reach it.

Here are the questions:
1-Does it matter that it was her first reported offense? Dad knows this happens a lot but he only get him every other weekend so this is the first time he had physical evidence.
2-Is there anything Dad can legally do to get him out of that house?
3-Is this enough to count as a change in circumstance to try to change custody?

 

[Proserpina]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Illinois
I'm writing this on behalf of my husband he can't type so I'm doing it for him.

My stepson's mom slapped him several times and left bruises on the entire right side of his face and scratches down both sides of his ears, bruises on the back of his neck, and a black eye. DCFS was contacted by the police when my husband reported it after we got him this weekend. When we got him the boy looked awful and we did take pictures of his face. DCFS did come the next day and speak with him and look at him. They said it looked like a handprint on his face. Mom told the police that her 3 year old was responsible that he hit my stepson (who is 7) with a flyswatter. Sunday Mom told DCFS that she hit the boy with a flyswatter. She said she was trying to hit his butt and he moved and got his face in the way. DCFS told Dad he had to return son to Mom. They said it was her first offense and there probably wouldn't be much done. DCFS met with Mom and all 3 sons on Monday. Mom says that everything went great and the only thing she got in trouble for was having a lighter on a shelf where they kids could reach it.

Here are the questions:
1-Does it matter that it was her first reported offense? Dad knows this happens a lot but he only get him every other weekend so this is the first time he had physical evidence.
2-Is there anything Dad can legally do to get him out of that house?
3-Is this enough to count as a change in circumstance to try to change custody?

Basically, if DCFS have decided there is no risk Dad has little chance at changing custody.

 

[Isis1]

At the very least, i'd head to court and request a no corporal punishment clause.

 

[MichaCA]

When the son came home and dad observed these injuries, he should have taken son to a doctor or ER. That calls more attention to the case. It was smart to take pictures...but the child should have been seen by a doctor.

 

[mistoffolees]

When the son came home and dad observed these injuries, he should have taken son to a doctor or ER. That calls more attention to the case. It was smart to take pictures...but the child should have been seen by a doctor.

And send Mom an anatomical diagram so she knows the difference between the butt and the face.

 

[stealth2]

So... does the boy not go to school? Don't the teachers see the injuries? What does the boy tell them when they ask? I would think that, if it was as serious as you're saying, someone else would have noticed and - as a mandated reporter - taken the next step.

 

[mybrood]

So... does the boy not go to school? Don't the teachers see the injuries? What does the boy tell them when they ask? I would think that, if it was as serious as you're saying, someone else would have noticed and - as a mandated reporter - taken the next step.[/

It happened on Thursday night. There was no school on Friday because of parent-teacher conference. When she went to work on Friday she took her youngest child to day care but left my step son with the neighbor. She said she couldn't take him to day care looking like that. We got him Friday night and immediately contacted DCFS but were told that they couldn't do anything unless they were contacted by the police so we called the police. The police would not send an officer out but did contact DCFS.

He has been seen in the ER on several different times over the past 2 years. He has had the same eye stiched up at least 3 times. Each time we were told the he "fell and hit the bathroom sink". Which I never believed but I'm just the step mom so there wasn't anything that I could do. The hospital never turned Mom into DCFS. He was also there once for burns on his arm. We has suspected that she mistreats him for a while but have not had the evidence to prove anything.

The boy has a learning disability and is a little slow. He is on 3 different medications one of which is a sleeping pill but I'm not for sure what the others are for. If you ask him if his mom spanks him he will tell you she does when she gets mad. But this is the first time she has been turned in to DCFS.

 

[mybrood]

The lady from DCFS who came and saw the child on Saturday was only the person who was on call for the weekend so his case was given to someone else in a different office on Monday. On Monday the new DCFS lady went to see Mom and kids. On Tuesday Dad called to see what was going on with the case and new lady had only heard Mom's side of story that it was an accident blah, blah, blah. By Monday most of the bruising was gone but the scratches were still there. She hadn't seen any pictures of the boy, she didn't have any of the notes from the first lady who came to our house and spoke to the boy. She didn't know that Mom had ran with son to try to hide what she did. Dad had to go thru and explain everything again. While he was on the phone with new lady she started either receiving or more likely started looking at the stuff from the first lady. She said that the investigation was still on-going and would take 2 months to complete.

Now Mom says that she is going to get a job 45 miles away and move so that the neighbors won't be able to contact the dads of her kids everytime they get a bruise. Can she really move out of the county? Is there anyway to keep her from taking the boy that away?

 

[CSO286]

Now Mom says that she is going to get a job 45 miles away and move so that the neighbors won't be able to contact the dads of her kids everytime they get a bruise. Can she really move out of the county? Is there anyway to keep her from taking the boy that away?

What does the court order say? It is possible that DAD may be able to petition for custody based on the move. Or, should he not prevail, then he can ask the court to order that the CP be responsible for all travel expenses as she created the distance.

In any event, simply moving is not going to get mom off the radar of CPS.

 

[MichaCA]

Next time child gets hurt, is there a different doctor or ER you/dad can take him to? The ER you've been taking him to is in the wrong, by my understanding if there is 'suspected' child abuse by law they have to call dhs AND law enforcement. When the child goes to the ER does he say what happened or does he lie to cover for his mom?

 

[Hot Topic]

Dad needs to be a lot more involved.

 

[stealth2]

It happened on Thursday night. There was no school on Friday because of parent-teacher conference. When she went to work on Friday she took her youngest child to day care but left my step son with the neighbor. She said she couldn't take him to day care looking like that. We got him Friday night and immediately contacted DCFS but were told that they couldn't do anything unless they were contacted by the police so we called the police. The police would not send an officer out but did contact DCFS.

<snip>

The boy has a learning disability and is a little slow. He is on 3 different medications one of which is a sleeping pill but I'm not for sure what the others are for. If you ask him if his mom spanks him he will tell you she does when she gets mad. But this is the first time she has been turned in to DCFS.

Okay, but...

Dad knows this happens a lot but he only get him every other weekend so this is the first time he had physical evidence.

So why has Dad not encouraged the boy to go to his teacher, the school nurse, the principal, etc?