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How to prove emotional abuse

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sadmother29

Junior Member
What is the name of your state?NY

How do I prove emotional abuse of my child by her father. He gained custody of her without my knowledge. Had the court papers sent to a wrong address and then notified me after the court date.

I have endured this same type of abuse for 10 years and have witnessed to many times to count of the emotional abuse of her.

She has gone to her school to report this and nothing has been done. He is calling her dumbass, stupid, idiot, bitch and completely humiliating and degrading her. She is so terrified of him, that she got updet on memorial day when she was sick (on visitation with me) when I suggested that I call her father so I can take her to the Doctors. She begged me not to call due to the fact that he would be furious at her for being sick. He is also treating her as his personal household servant. She is 11 years old. She has to do the dishes, vaccuum, ALL of the laundry,dust, feed the animals and more EVERY day. During this time, he sits on his but and plays on the computer drinking his beer. By the way he is an alcoholic. Since the seperation, she has asked god to kill her, attempted suicide and is starting to physically harm other children.

Before our seperation, his OWN MOTHER and SISTER constantly told him that he is tooo harsh on her and he needs to let her be a little girl.

How can I prove this to the courts about what he is doing and what he has done. I know it will be he said and she said. He rules her a tyrant and treats her as a possession.
 
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guudgracious

Junior Member
abusive father

I am not an authority on the law but I thought I might suggest calling a local abuse line. The abuse I suffered was mostly emotional which worked it's way into physical. This can have a long lasting effect especially on a child.

Many states have formed networks of organizations that offer aid in abusive situations. If you cannot find help on on of the lines try searching Google for ideas of which abuse networks can provide assistance. Try "Domestic Abuse Hotlines + New York" as your search criteria.

There is help- lot's of it if you can find the right place to look.
Good luck!
 
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carofl93

Member
Call DCFS and they will send out a caseworker to question both her and dad. My husband's ex-wife sent them out after we got custody with an emotional abuse claim (it was false...woman hadn't spoken to her daughter in 4 months, not for our lack of trying to get her on the phone), and they spoke to all of us (me, hubby and SD) separately.
I am very curious about who your daughter is talking to at her school...it seems like they are required to report abuse of any sort to the proper authorities...I know in physical and sexual abuse cases, there is a law...unsure about mental abuse, but to me it goes right along with the other 2.
When she attempted suicide, was she hospitalized? If so (and I hope she is getting some kind of therapy for that), those records could be entered as evidence.
As for the chores...my kids help out with them...my 9yo SD and my 2yo son help out with putting away dishes and vaccuuming, and SD is learning about doing laundry with supervision. She also feeds and waters our cats (litterbox duty is mine because it's just too nasty for a child to do in my book.)
I hope something can be done to help her!
Good luck,
Carol
 

sadmother29

Junior Member
Emotional Abuse

He forces her to do ALL of the cleaning. He won't help her at all. She is forced to get his beer from the fridge etc....

As far as the suicide attempt, no she did not get hospitalized. I didn't find out about it until 1 week later and he only allows me to have her on the weekends. I now have her for two weeks. I am taking her for a psych evaluation next week.

I have two witnesses who are going into court that hve seen this abuse. She has been talking to her school counslor but they state there is nothing that they can do but they were the ones who reccommended the psych evaluation. This school is confusing me, they say there is a problem but won't do anything about it.
 

carofl93

Member
You weren't told until a week after the fact?!? Who was it that told you about the attempt? If I were in your position, I would start keeping a log of everything that happens...good or bad. I'm not a lawyer or employed in the legal profession in any way, but I think that with a situation like this, you could petition for emergency custody. I hope her psych eval goes well and that she will be able to continue getting the help she needs to get through this part of her life.

You will be in my thoughts and prayers throughout this ordeal.

Carol
 

sadmother29

Junior Member
Emotional Abuse

He is the one who told be about the attempt. I am already keeping a log. I am just so worried about her right now. She has asked God to end her life in front of me. An 11 year old should not be talking this way. I just know that proving emotional abuse is extremely hard.
 

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