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I want to drop the charges, but the ADA says no way

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kris12222

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? NY

Last week my boyfriend of 2 years and I got into a huge fight over his drinking. I flipped out and hit him, I mean, I decked him and he fell to the ground. He then got up and I hit him again at which time he punch me in the face and landed on my eye, giving me a black eye. I called the police (which I regret) and he was arrested. He spent 2 nights in jail and was arraigned, I went to the arraignment and told the court I didnt want to press charges, he was released ROR and I was given an order of protection which I neither want nor need. I received a subpoena today to appear at his non jury trial. I called the D.A and she said she wouldnt allow the charges to be dropped and would pursue with or without me.

I don't want him in jail and I sure as heck do not want an OOP, we live together and he is now in private treatment for his alcohol abuse. The D.A. said that he could plea to a lesser charge and possibly a modified OOP would be issued.

What lesser charges could he face and not get jail time? How do I get the OOP lifted and if not lifted, modified so that he can be home. He works from home and is not able to work right now because he has to stay at a friends house until this thing is done.

I never wanted him in jail, I want him sober, which this whole thing seems to have done the trick. He is 6 days sober, which doesnt sound like a lot, but you have to start somewhere right? He is living with his mom most of the time and I have spoken to her several times since that is the only way I can communicate with him. He has a public defender and cannot afford a regular lawyer, I am afraid that his PD will not fight enough for him.

Thanks for the help!
 


Just Blue

Senior Member
If you are called to testify tell the jury what happened...They may (I would) find that he acted in self defense.

Did you tell the police or the DA that YOU were the aggressor in the incident?
 

HomeGuru

Senior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? NY

Last week my boyfriend of 2 years and I got into a huge fight over his drinking. I flipped out and hit him, I mean, I decked him and he fell to the ground. He then got up and I hit him again at which time he punch me in the face and landed on my eye, giving me a black eye. I called the police (which I regret) and he was arrested. He spent 2 nights in jail and was arraigned, I went to the arraignment and told the court I didnt want to press charges, he was released ROR and I was given an order of protection which I neither want nor need. I received a subpoena today to appear at his non jury trial. I called the D.A and she said she wouldnt allow the charges to be dropped and would pursue with or without me.

I don't want him in jail and I sure as heck do not want an OOP, we live together and he is now in private treatment for his alcohol abuse. The D.A. said that he could plea to a lesser charge and possibly a modified OOP would be issued.

What lesser charges could he face and not get jail time? How do I get the OOP lifted and if not lifted, modified so that he can be home. He works from home and is not able to work right now because he has to stay at a friends house until this thing is done.

I never wanted him in jail, I want him sober, which this whole thing seems to have done the trick. He is 6 days sober, which doesnt sound like a lot, but you have to start somewhere right? He is living with his mom most of the time and I have spoken to her several times since that is the only way I can communicate with him. He has a public defender and cannot afford a regular lawyer, I am afraid that his PD will not fight enough for him.

Thanks for the help!
**A: you can't charge him, only the state can.
 

kris12222

Junior Member
I did tell the D.A. that, in fact both of our statements from the night of the incident say that I hit him first. She said that didn't matter. Should he make sure that his lawyer knows this fact? Can he plead that? My concern is that it would add to the need for an order of protection.
 

HomeGuru

Senior Member
I did tell the D.A. that, in fact both of our statements from the night of the incident say that I hit him first. She said that didn't matter. Should he make sure that his lawyer knows this fact? Can he plead that? My concern is that it would add to the need for an order of protection.
**A: were you guys ever on the Cops show?
 

Just Blue

Senior Member
I did tell the D.A. that, in fact both of our statements from the night of the incident say that I hit him first. She said that didn't matter. Should he make sure that his lawyer knows this fact? Can he plead that? My concern is that it would add to the need for an order of protection.
What is your boyfriends criminal history??
 

Eekamouse

Senior Member
And how much had you had to drink that night before you decided that the best way to deal with him was to start punching him in the face?
 

kris12222

Junior Member
Absolutely nothing, I don't drink. I have seen what it can do to people and I hate the stuff, which is what started the fight to begin with.
 

Eekamouse

Senior Member
So you started wailing on your boyfriend stone cold sober because that seemed like the right thing to do? YOU'RE the one who should be facing charges. He was at least drunk. What your excuse?
 

BL

Senior Member
It usually happens ,they charge the person intoxicated and was aggressive , plus being a male added to the pot .

It use to be the parties could go into the courtroom , in front of the Judge , and get a R/O dropped with a good scolding from the Judge .

No more , laws have changed .

The State takes the case , period .

You can say you were the aggressor all you want , but they'll look at it he was drunk , and you are a female .

Plus he didn't have to lay hands on you .
 

BL

Senior Member
It usually happens ,they charge the person intoxicated and was aggressive , plus being a male added to the pot .

It use to be the parties could go into the courtroom , in front of the Judge , and get a R/O dropped with a good scolding from the Judge .

No more , laws have changed .

The State takes the case , period .

You can say you were the aggressor all you want , but they'll look at it he was drunk , and you are a female .

Plus he didn't have to lay hands on you .

Too many folks being murdered in DV cases .
 
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