No contact order

[Rebeccalou133]

I'm from Iowa, a few weeks ago I put a no contact order on my ex, I would like to get in touch so I can get my car fixed. He is a mechanic, I have not seen or talked to him since I put the no contact order on him. I do not wish to be in a romantic relationship with him again, I just would like him to fix my car. (He is the best mechanic in town) The morning I called police we both got physical with each other but I had a mark on my arm. Other then that he has not had any prior DV charge's, there where no witnesses and even the sheriff barley believed me. I have a court date to get this lifted and hopefully get this lifted. Is there any advice on what I should expect to speed this process.

 

[quincy]

I'm from Iowa, a few weeks ago I put a no contact order on my ex, I would like to get in touch so I can get my car fixed. He is a mechanic, I have not seen or talked to him since I put the no contact order on him. I do not wish to be in a romantic relationship with him again, I just would like him to fix my car. (He is the best mechanic in town) The morning I called police we both got physical with each other but I had a mark on my arm. Other then that he has not had any prior DV charge's, there where no witnesses and even the sheriff barley believed me. I have a court date to get this lifted and hopefully get this lifted. Is there any advice on what I should expect to speed this process.

You should find a different mechanic.

You should not make your ex violate his no-contact order by trying to contact him yourself.

 

[Rebeccalou133]

That is why I am trying to get it dropped

 

[CTU]

That is why I am trying to get it dropped

So, you obtained a NCO because you felt you were in danger, and two weeks later your car needs to be fixed and you suddenly feel safe?

Is that right?

 

[quincy]

That is why I am trying to get it dropped

Until the order is dropped, you should have no contact with your ex and your ex should have no contact with you.

At the hearing, you will be asked questions and your ex will be asked questions. You can make your wishes known at that time - although I would not tell the judge that you want the order dropped because you need a good mechanic. The judge will determine if the order should remain in place.

 

[not2cleverRed]

Don't want trouble = obey court orders.

There is more than one mechanic in town. Use the second best one.

 

[Rebeccalou133]

I am following the law by not contacting him, I did not ask for opinions but for advice. Thank you everyone for the advice unlike the ones who just want to tell me I'm wrong. Please if anyone would give me some more ideas on how to get this lifted instead of telling me that getting this lifted is impossible.

 

[CTU]

I am following the law by not contacting him, I did not ask for opinions but for advice. Thank you everyone for the advice unlike the ones who just want to tell me I'm wrong. Please if anyone would give me some more ideas on how to get this lifted instead of telling me that getting this lifted is impossible.

You're wrong.

Have a nice day.

You're welcome.

 

[quincy]

I am following the law by not contacting him, I did not ask for opinions but for advice. Thank you everyone for the advice unlike the ones who just want to tell me I'm wrong. Please if anyone would give me some more ideas on how to get this lifted instead of telling me that getting this lifted is impossible.

There IS no way to get the order cancelled until the hearing. The judge will weigh the facts and the testimony of both parties and decide whether there is good reason to keep the order in place.

If you want to be able to contact your ex again and your ex wants to be able to contact you again, you and your ex will want to present yourselves at the hearing as levelheaded adults who admit a dispute could have been settled in a more mature fashion. You will want to show the judge that the incident was a one-time incident that got out of control and there is no risk of future physical violence happening again.

Because real domestic abuse victims often recant their stories or minimize the harm caused by their abuser, the judge is more likely to leave the order in place than s/he is to lift it.

 

[Rebeccalou133]

Thank you, Quincy for the advice!

 

[quincy]

Thank you, Quincy for the advice!

You're welcome, Rebeccalou133.

I hope what is decided at the hearing winds up being the safest and best for all parties.