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Physical and verbal abuse. Laws bar from taking steps to break away from abuse.

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Finchos

Junior Member
First of all i'm asking this for my friend, she's living in NJ.

She's 20, but certain laws are apparently stopping her from rebeling againts her abusive familly. She's actually leaving the house, her familly's, and going to her bf's house. She's leaving alot of her things there, car, bed, clothes etc. so that her mother doesn't report her for theft and grand theft auto.

She is extremely sick, due to stress (from abuse, school and her depression) and maybe even from some of the medications she's taking.

She can't do anything about the medication because as soon as she goes ask about it or stop taking them her familly is gona bring her into the hospital to get diagnosed and she's afraid of being institionalized for being depressed (e.g. "suicidal")


I would to ask information about what are some of the things she can do to protect herself from her familly and the laws that bar her from breaking away from unhealthy practices. I say unhealthy practices because I used to be depressed and I never took medication for it. I was able to get out of it through my own will and a bit of support from family and friends. I don't think she needs to be institutionalized but laws are laws.

Here's a log of the things she told me on an instant messenger, and yes I have her permission to post this. It's pretty long so if you're committing yourself to reading all of it, I sugest taking notes, because it's not organized. It's purely in the same order that the conversation happened.

here's the log of the conversation, in rich text format (It works with everything):

http://rapidshare.com/files/116160397/Session_Start.rtf.html

note: I left out certain parts that I felt were unimportant (mostly some jokes that I say and anecdotes that aren't related to the subject of this post).

note 2: "wishing I was" is her and I'm "erotaku http://w", the numbers on the left side are the time of day.

I left some of her thoughts in to show that her mental point of view is on the negative side, but also to show she's not suicidal. But yes she has, as she has said herself, a defitist attitude up to this point. But for the rest of it, it should give enough information about the situation. And I'm sorry but I can't give more information at this time. She's not in reach of communications.

I'm watching this thread dilligently, but you can e-mail me at [email protected] if you don't want to take any chances.

PS. I'm canadian so I don't know much of anything about US laws, so please try to explain some things with the right amount of details.

Thankyou.
 


Just Blue

Senior Member
Has this woman's parents been given guardianship over her? Does she suffer from a mental illness or disorder? If not she is an adult and can just move.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
She could leave. Nothing stops her from leaving but her. If her parents are the ones on the title to the car then the car is not hers legally. She can move in with her boyfriend unless she has been deemed mentally incompetent by a court and they gave guardianship to her parents.
 

Finchos

Junior Member
She can move in with her boyfriend unless she has been deemed mentally incompetent by a court and they gave guardianship to her parents.
So how would she deffend herself againts that? That's the main concern here. And what do you mean by mentally incompetent? Mental handicap? Depression?
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
So how would she deffend herself againts that? That's the main concern here. And what do you mean by mentally incompetent? Mental handicap? Depression?
No. What I mean is the legal definition which means she is not mentally competent to make ANY decisions for herself. She doesn't have to defend against it -- they would have to prove it with testimony from professionals who have treated her and those professionals would have to state that this woman cannot make any decisions for herself.
 

Finchos

Junior Member
No. What I mean is the legal definition which means she is not mentally competent to make ANY decisions for herself. She doesn't have to defend against it -- they would have to prove it with testimony from professionals who have treated her and those professionals would have to state that this woman cannot make any decisions for herself.
Well she left her parent's house tonight, so I guess that's not a problem then.

But what about her depression? And the drugs she's taking? I told her to get a 2nd opinion cuz for all I know her parents and their doctor might be in... for the lack of a better word, "cahoots".
 

Just Blue

Senior Member
Well she left her parent's house tonight, so I guess that's not a problem then.

But what about her depression? And the drugs she's taking? I told her to get a 2nd opinion cuz for all I know her parents and their doctor might be in... for the lack of a better word, "cahoots".
That is really unlikely. But your friend should get a second opinion. And she should be posting for herself...You really don't know enough about the situation.
 

Finchos

Junior Member
I'm posting to try and convince her to do the same actually, I do plan to get her to read all this. One thing at a time anyways.
 

HuAi

Member
Make she sure doesnt stop taking her meds while awaiting the second medical opinion. Your perception of her condition is probably skewed, and those may very well be keeping her stable.
 

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