Possible child abuse?

[Tudot]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? TN

I have two girls that go to their father's every weekend. Last month, I was informed by them that the oldest (7 years) was forced to sleep on the floor with only a blanket for teasing her younger sister. I was then informed by the girls this past weekend that when the youngest (4 yrs) has bathroom accidents, she is made to sleep naked.

As a survivor of mental, physical, and sexual abuse, I find all of this disturbing. They have had Dept. of Children's Services called on them twice in the last couple of years for the floor thing and for spanking the oldest too hard and leaving bruises. The step-mother involved (who seems to do the majority of the punishing) had her parental rights to her own child revoked for alleged abuse.

I guess my question is, is this child abuse? Do I need to get DCS involved? Any time I try to talk to the father about anything regarding punishment, he nods his head, says "ok", and continues doing whatever he chooses without regard to how I feel about it or how it may be perceived. I also don't want to jump the gun based on my own past and how I personally feel about something.

 

[Ohiogal]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? TN

I have two girls that go to their father's every weekend. Last month, I was informed by them that the oldest (7 years) was forced to sleep on the floor with only a blanket for teasing her younger sister. I was then informed by the girls this past weekend that when the youngest (4 yrs) has bathroom accidents, she is made to sleep naked.

As a survivor of mental, physical, and sexual abuse, I find all of this disturbing. They have had Dept. of Children's Services called on them twice in the last couple of years for the floor thing and for spanking the oldest too hard and leaving bruises. The step-mother involved (who seems to do the majority of the punishing) had her parental rights to her own child revoked for alleged abuse.

I guess my question is, is this child abuse? Do I need to get DCS involved? Any time I try to talk to the father about anything regarding punishment, he nods his head, says "ok", and continues doing whatever he chooses without regard to how I feel about it or how it may be perceived. I also don't want to jump the gun based on my own past and how I personally feel about something.

Have you talked to dad about this? What evidence do you have other than the word of the children? Sleeping on the floor is NOT abuse. Nor is sleeping naked. Dad doesn't need to parent like you do. Do you let him dictate how you do things in your house?

 

[LdiJ]

Have you talked to dad about this? What evidence do you have other than the word of the children? Sleeping on the floor is NOT abuse. Nor is sleeping naked. Dad doesn't need to parent like you do. Do you let him dictate how you do things in your house?

I think its pushing the envelope a little bit, particularly combined with the fact that the stepmother apparently lost parental rights to her own child.

 

[Ohiogal]

I think its pushing the envelope a little bit, particularly combined with the fact that the stepmother apparently lost parental rights to her own child.

It is not considered abuse. At all. And you don't know why stepmother allegedly lost her parental rights or if she did. Nor what the circumstances were. And I highly doubt OP knows the details.

 

[Tudot]

Have you talked to dad about this? What evidence do you have other than the word of the children? Sleeping on the floor is NOT abuse. Nor is sleeping naked. Dad doesn't need to parent like you do. Do you let him dictate how you do things in your house?

Wow. I didn't come here to be insulted. I came here with legitimate concerns for the safety of my children. And I believe I posted why the mother did, in fact, lose custody and parental rights to her child... for abuse. As I stated in the original post, the father does not listen to me when I try to talk to him about the children. If the kids were wanting to sleep on the floor and wanting to run around in the nude, then fine. I wouldn't worry about it. It is the fact that they are being forced. Anyway, thanks for the insults. I'll just take my concerns elsewhere... maybe someplace where they actually pay attention to detail.

 

[LdiJ]

Wow. I didn't come here to be insulted. I came here with legitimate concerns for the safety of my children. And I believe I posted why the mother did, in fact, lose custody and parental rights to her child... for abuse. As I stated in the original post, the father does not listen to me when I try to talk to him about the children. If the kids were wanting to sleep on the floor and wanting to run around in the nude, then fine. I wouldn't worry about it. It is the fact that they are being forced. Anyway, thanks for the insults. I'll just take my concerns elsewhere... maybe someplace where they actually pay attention to detail.

While I personally think, particularly in light of the fact that stepmom lost her rights to her child, that at least the envelope is being pushed here, the reality of things is that those things alone, are simply not enough to substantiate abuse. They would be enough to cause me some concern, but not enough to take it any further than that at this point.

 

[stealth2]

Seem like parenting differences. To me.

 

[Silverplum]

Seem like parenting differences. To me.

To me, also. And I don't see the "insult."

 

[Zigner]

Frankly, I can easily see a child sleeping without clothes after a bed-wetting incident. Kid wakes up crying, parent wakes up bleary-eyed to attend to the child. Wet clothing and bedding is tossed to the side...extra bedding is pulled out and tossed on to the bed along with the kid, while the wet bedding and clothing is tossed to the side, to be attended to in the morning.

 

[Ohiogal]

Wow. I didn't come here to be insulted. I came here with legitimate concerns for the safety of my children. And I believe I posted why the mother did, in fact, lose custody and parental rights to her child... for abuse. As I stated in the original post, the father does not listen to me when I try to talk to him about the children. If the kids were wanting to sleep on the floor and wanting to run around in the nude, then fine. I wouldn't worry about it. It is the fact that they are being forced. Anyway, thanks for the insults. I'll just take my concerns elsewhere... maybe someplace where they actually pay attention to detail.

I paid attention. You stated:

had her parental rights to her own child revoked for alleged abuse

Alleged abuse does NOT result in someone's parental rights being "revoked".

 

[Zigner]

OP acknowledges that there is absolutely nothing wrong with a child sleeping in the nude. At that point it becomes a parenting difference.

 

[CTU]

I paid attention. You stated:


Alleged abuse does NOT result in someone's parental rights being "revoked".

My sentiments exactly.

Particularly the underlined. Lost custody? Possibly. But rights terminated? Naw.