Protected person circumventing her own order.

[cybrchef]

What is the name of your state? California

I am in a wierd position. I had been in an on-off relationship with the mother of my child for 4 years. For 3 of them, there has been a restraining order, just renewed 3 months ago. But for most of that time, she has contacted me for reconciliation and I stupidly went along without her dropping the order. The problem is that when we get into an arguement, she breaks up and has the power to prevent me from calling her for any reason until she decides that she'll make the call. Well, this last time, I did go over to her house to talk and I was arrested. My questions are two-fold. One, will it matter much that she is continuously asking me to break the order when it goes to court? And secondly, is this grounds enough for me to get one against her to prevent her from contacting me, or do I have to cite violence on her part?

 

[seniorjudge]

What is the name of your state? California

I am in a wierd position. I had been in an on-off relationship with the mother of my child for 4 years. For 3 of them, there has been a restraining order, just renewed 3 months ago. But for most of that time, she has contacted me for reconciliation and I stupidly went along without her dropping the order. The problem is that when we get into an arguement, she breaks up and has the power to prevent me from calling her for any reason until she decides that she'll make the call. Well, this last time, I did go over to her house to talk and I was arrested. My questions are two-fold. One, will it matter much that she is continuously asking me to break the order when it goes to court? And secondly, is this grounds enough for me to get one against her to prevent her from contacting me, or do I have to cite violence on her part?

Q: One, will it matter much that she is continuously asking me to break the order when it goes to court?

A: It could be a mitigating factor in your favor although the judge will likely ask why you are doing such a stupid thing.


Q: And secondly, is this grounds enough for me to get one against her to prevent her from contacting me, or do I have to cite violence on her part?

A: Try it...who knows, you might just get one.

 

[CdwJava]

A judge in CA will not likely grant a TRO against her with the circumstances you provided. However, he will likely entertain a motion to dismiss the current one if you can document her continued contacts with you.

Now, if you even answer the phone, speak to her, or make contact with her in violation of the TRO, you are a fool. Don't answer her calls ... don't go to where she is ... don't even talk to her.

It's likely that contact regarding the child is permitted. If so, I'd do that in public and NEVER at her home or anyplace where she could alledge a violation of the order.

- Carl