Put restraining order on Ex-Girlfriend and she is ordered to leave my house...

[Astrocloud]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Massachusetts

My ex-girlfriend is an alcoholic. It was/is getting worse and one night we had a fight where she bit me really hard -so I called the police. She was arrested and I followed up by putting a restraining order on her.

All of her stuff is in my house. I'm sick of looking at it. I would like her to come pick it up (and get out of my life forever).

Today, I texted her and told her that she can contact me only for this reason -to pick up her stuff. She didn't reply.

What should I do? What can I do?

I'm not vindictive. I don't want her hurt... I just want her gone and her stuff gone as well.

 

[sandyclaus]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Massachusetts

My ex-girlfriend is an alcoholic. It was/is getting worse and one night we had a fight where she bit me really hard -so I called the police. She was arrested and I followed up by putting a restraining order on her.

All of her stuff is in my house. I'm sick of looking at it. I would like her to come pick it up (and get out of my life forever).

Today, I texted her and told her that she can contact me only for this reason -to pick up her stuff. She didn't reply.

What should I do? What can I do?

I'm not vindictive. I don't want her hurt... I just want her gone and her stuff gone as well.

You placed a restraining order against her - and you're surprised she hasn't responded to your text message? Dude, a restraining order legally prohibits her from doing so. For all she knows, you are simply trying to trip her up and get her arrested for violating the order.

Pack up her stuff and put it in storage. Send a letter to her or to a family member of hers to let them know what you've done and where they can find her property.

 

[single317dad]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Massachusetts

My ex-girlfriend is an alcoholic. It was/is getting worse and one night we had a fight where she bit me really hard -so I called the police. She was arrested and I followed up by putting a restraining order on her.

All of her stuff is in my house. I'm sick of looking at it. I would like her to come pick it up (and get out of my life forever).

Today, I texted her and told her that she can contact me only for this reason -to pick up her stuff. She didn't reply.

What should I do? What can I do?

I'm not vindictive. I don't want her hurt... I just want her gone and her stuff gone as well.

Agreed. Pack it up and make it available to someone who can pick it up for her, or move it somewhere she can get it. Stop contacting her, your permission counts for nothing. She cannot contact you AT ALL.

 

[Astrocloud]

You placed a restraining order against her - and you're surprised she hasn't responded to your text message? Dude, a restraining order legally prohibits her from doing so. For all she knows, you are simply trying to trip her up and get her arrested for violating the order.

Pack up her stuff and put it in storage. Send a letter to her or to a family member of hers to let them know what you've done and where they can find her property.

I like your idea there is just a few little problems, with the exception of her clothes -I'm going to need to pay someone to help me move the bed out of here. It doesn't fit down narrow Victorian stairwells very easily. Last time we moved all of her stuff, I hired professional movers. It would be similar this time.

Also, I found out from her friend that she is in some sort of halfway house right now -which is why she isn't picking up her stuff.

In addition, it's highly probable that she acts extra flaky and leaves me with the storage locker rental while she does whatever. She is a working poor class and I don't want to be stuck with any more of her bills.

I'm thinking about taking all of my stuff and moving out.

 

[single317dad]

I'm thinking about taking all of my stuff and moving out.

If you leave all her stuff there, the landlord will likely charge you a fee for removing it.

Is she on the lease as well, or just you? Eviction may be an option here, but you'd still have to move and store her stuff; it would just give you a possible avenue to recover those expenses.

 

[Ohiogal]

I like your idea there is just a few little problems, with the exception of her clothes -I'm going to need to pay someone to help me move the bed out of here. It doesn't fit down narrow Victorian stairwells very easily. Last time we moved all of her stuff, I hired professional movers. It would be similar this time.

Also, I found out from her friend that she is in some sort of halfway house right now -which is why she isn't picking up her stuff.

In addition, it's highly probable that she acts extra flaky and leaves me with the storage locker rental while she does whatever. She is a working poor class and I don't want to be stuck with any more of her bills.

I'm thinking about taking all of my stuff and moving out.

Then prepare to be sued for the value of all of her stuff. And she may very well win. She is working poor class and yet she was good enough to sleep with and share your bed until you got tired of her. So what does that make you?

 

[Astrocloud]

Double post

 

[Astrocloud]

Then prepare to be sued for the value of all of her stuff. And she may very well win. She is working poor class and yet she was good enough to sleep with and share your bed until you got tired of her. So what does that make you?

You have no idea what went on.

 

[single317dad]

You have no idea what went on.

The facts remain: you invited her into your home, and now you've had her removed involuntarily. The logic behind it isn't nearly as important as the legal reality that you're probably stuck absorbing some expense now.

 

[xylene]

Upper class people hire a lawyer to deal with their legal problems.

(That's serious advice)

 

[Astrocloud]

The facts remain: you invited her into your home,

Actually, no. Stop making assumptions and then placing them on me as if what goes on in your mind is what actually happened. We met in an illegal boarding house, where the slumlord rented her a room in what was previously an all male floor. We moved out together.

and now you've had her removed involuntarily.

The police did it for my own safety. You have no idea what it's like to see this happen to someone that you care about. I am seriously grieving here and all I'm getting are these troll replies.

I was the one that took her to the hospital when she was vomiting blood from her alcohol related illness -gastritis. I watched a doctor patronizingly tell her not to drink alchohol anymore.

I'm the one that would get calls from concerned bartenders when she would pass out in their bar. I'm the one that would skip out of work to "rescue" her from going to the hospital or worse.

I'm the one that picked her up off the floor and put her into her bed.

I'm the one that got dumped after giving her an ultimatum about not drinking any more alcohol. Within a week she met someone else on the internet.

And finally, I'm the one that got attacked after repeatedly asking her to keep the volume down on her phone call to her new "boyfriend".

And believe me, (some of) the police in this state would love it if they could've pinned the blame on me. I'm a male, and pseudo-chivalry dictates that men are always the problem in a relationship dispute. Do you think I rashly put a restraining order on someone that I loved for 3 years because I just got sick of her? I've tried everything. I was being abused.

The logic behind it isn't nearly as important as the legal reality that you're probably stuck absorbing some expense now.

Yes, this is the point. I'm trying to minimize my expenses. I probably should move out because a) I don't need the extra room and b) I need to save money. If you are aware of a storage location in Boston that charges less than $40 dollars a month -I'm all ears.

 

[Astrocloud]

Upper class people hire a lawyer to deal with their legal problems.

(That's serious advice)

You are not being serious. YOU ARE A TROLL.

I never said that I was "upper class". I said that she was working poor. This is, in fact a sad description of most of America. If you make $10 an hour then you are working poor, too.


For your serious advice I wouldn't give two nickles. Welcome to my ignore list.

 

[Antigone*]

You are not being serious. YOU ARE A TROLL.

I never said that I was "upper class". I said that she was working poor. This is, in fact a sad description of most of America. If you make $10 an hour then you are working poor, too.


For your serious advice I wouldn't give two nickles. Welcome to my ignore list.

Dude, you got all the advice you needed with the first answer to your question. You acted properly by calling the police. You acted improperly by communicating with her.

The fact remains that you did invite her to live with you, and now you have to deal with the aftermath of your choices. Spend the money to pack her things and move them out to a storage facilty. Pay one month's rent. Send all the information regarding her belongings to her via CCR and then you're done.

 

[single317dad]

Actually, no. Stop making assumptions and then placing them on me as if what goes on in your mind is what actually happened. We met in an illegal boarding house, where the slumlord rented her a room in what was previously an all male floor. We moved out together.



The police did it for my own safety. You have no idea what it's like to see this happen to someone that you care about. I am seriously grieving here and all I'm getting are these troll replies.

I was the one that took her to the hospital when she was vomiting blood from her alcohol related illness -gastritis. I watched a doctor patronizingly tell her not to drink alchohol anymore.

I'm the one that would get calls from concerned bartenders when she would pass out in their bar. I'm the one that would skip out of work to "rescue" her from going to the hospital or worse.

I'm the one that picked her up off the floor and put her into her bed.

I'm the one that got dumped after giving her an ultimatum about not drinking any more alcohol. Within a week she met someone else on the internet.

And finally, I'm the one that got attacked after repeatedly asking her to keep the volume down on her phone call to her new "boyfriend".

And believe me, (some of) the police in this state would love it if they could've pinned the blame on me. I'm a male, and pseudo-chivalry dictates that men are always the problem in a relationship dispute. Do you think I rashly put a restraining order on someone that I loved for 3 years because I just got sick of her? I've tried everything. I was being abused.



Yes, this is the point. I'm trying to minimize my expenses. I probably should move out because a) I don't need the extra room and b) I need to save money. If you are aware of a storage location in Boston that charges less than $40 dollars a month -I'm all ears.

BTDT. Get with the legal program or suffer the consequences. If you're here to compare war stories yours will pale in comparison. If you're here for legal advice regarding your situation, look up.

Good day, sir.

 

[Astrocloud]

Send all the information regarding her belongings to her via CCR and then you're done.

What is a CCR?