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  1. #1
    Desperatetime is offline Junior Member
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    Question regarding CDV and dropping charges

    What is the name of your state SC

    I am a 56 year old female living in SC. A male roommate attacked me recently, I called the police, and we both ended up being arrested for Criminal Domestic Violence. I did some research and this appears to be his 4th CDV offense, with the 3rd previous offense being a felony. He claims that he has written a letter taking full responsibility and absolving me of blame. The letter is being picked up today. But is it that simple? Will that do me any good? My understanding is that once charges are filed for CDV, it is difficult for that charge to be dropped, even though I am not guilty in any way. What can I do, if anything, with his admission of guilt? Thanks in advance for any advice or guidance, I really appreciate it.Ē
  2. #2
    FlyingRon is offline Senior Member
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    You need a lawyer. Just because he says something doesn't necessarily get you off the hook. He can't "take the blame" on a mutual assault case (i.e., it's not legal for you two to be duking it out, "he started it" doesn't mean anything). Absent knowing exactly what the prosecutor is alleging, we can't tell you if you will be found innocent or what your defense might be.
  3. #3
    Eekamouse is offline Senior Member
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    If you were the victim, why did the cops arrest you?
  4. #4
    Desperatetime is offline Junior Member
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    Question regarding CDV and dropping charges

    Quote Originally Posted by FlyingRon View Post
    You need a lawyer. Just because he says something doesn't necessarily get you off the hook. He can't "take the blame" on a mutual assault case (i.e., it's not legal for you two to be duking it out, "he started it" doesn't mean anything). Absent knowing exactly what the prosecutor is alleging, we can't tell you if you will be found innocent or what your defense might be.
    Thank you for your response. To clarify, we were not duking it out. It happened so fast, he had too much to drink, snapped, grabbed me, threw me on the floor with his hands on my neck in a position to break it, not choke. While saying, "What are you going to do now bitch"? I got up and he did the same thing 2 more times. At that point, I called the police, did not take the time to look at myself for injuries. I had a cut on my forehead, my nose bruised, a cut on the side of my nose, and puncture marks, whelps and bruises on my shoulders and arms. He was very well versed in what to say to the officers. One officer in particular, who signed the arrest warrant and came into the room where this occurred, stated he did not see anything out of place, when files were upside down, a table and part of my printer broken, and my necklace jerked off my neck laying in the floor broken. When I got to the police station, my attacker was in the same area, this same officer was escorting me. My attacker started yelling F____ You. I asked the officer if he heard him, which I knew he had, he did not answer, so I asked him again, and I mean as calmly as possible, the officer responded by saying "Yes for the fourth time". We went into another area and the officer stated he had seen 105 lb., women do a lot of damage to men bigger than them. I am a very small person. He also stated "If it had been left up to me I would have ______________ your a__". He used a slang word that I have never heard. Nothing was said to my attacker for yelling obscenities.

    My injuries were pointed out to me at the police station by another officer.

    I have no criminal history, I called the police for protection. I was terrified with my attackers sudden rage. I don't know what set him off so suddenly. My thought is he had something on his mind, had too much to drink and it came out in a violent manner.

    Having said this, I have been wrongly accused and charged with CDV. I take this very seriously and hoped his admission of guilt would have some bearing on my charge. Any suggestions at all would be appreciated.
    Thank you..
  5. #5
    FlyingRon is offline Senior Member
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    You need a lawyer. If there wasn't probable cause for the charge, then your lawyer can probably get it dismissed early on. Otherwise he'll have to mount a defense. Again, it's wishful thinking to think that the prosecutor is just going to dismiss charges (especially in a DV case) because one of those charged changes their story.
  6. #6
    Desperatetime is offline Junior Member
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    Question regarding CDV and dropping charges

    Quote Originally Posted by Eekamouse View Post
    If you were the victim, why did the cops arrest you?
    I asked the same thing. It is apparently very common in SC for both parties to be arrested. When the officers arrive and there are two different stories, they can charge both of you and take both of you to jail. He had eye surgery recently. I took him for all of his appointments including surgery. I also took him to the eye doctor two times on one Sunday due to problems he was having with his eye. I believe he made a statement about his eye (which was unrelated) and the report said he had manifestations on his stomach, I did not touch his stomach, I could not move, he had me pinned down. He works in construction and has cuts and nicks on him all the time. I have no idea what they are referring to. I stayed on the phone with the dispatcher until the police arrived. It took about 15 -20 minutes, during this time he was in the same room the incident occurred, aware I was calling the police. With his priors he had time to prepare for his side of the story. It never entered my mind that would happen. I stayed on the front porch.

    Thank you for asking.
  7. #7
    Desperatetime is offline Junior Member
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    Question regarding CDV and dropping charges

    Quote Originally Posted by FlyingRon View Post
    You need a lawyer. If there wasn't probable cause for the charge, then your lawyer can probably get it dismissed early on. Otherwise he'll have to mount a defense. Again, it's wishful thinking to think that the prosecutor is just going to dismiss charges (especially in a DV case) because one of those charged changes their story.
    That was my thought as well, it would not be likely the prosecutor would dismiss the charge. The first hearing is scheduled for Magistrate Court. Of course I will plead not guilty. Can the Magistrate dismiss the charge? Given his priors, it seems that would add to discrediting his original statement and also be and indication of his character. What is your thought? Is this wishful thinking on my part?

    Thank you so very much.
  8. #8
    single317dad is offline Senior Member
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    I find it interesting that you remain here asking for legal advice, instead of going forth with the advice given (to get a lawyer to defend yourself against this criminal charge). It makes me wonder if you're actually the party in question, as that person would likely already have a lawyer.

    ETA: Based on your other thread, I also think you're at least bordering on adultery here. SC is one of the few states that still takes that seriously. Your husband may be waiting to get his case together for a fault-based divorce.
    Last edited by single317dad; 12-16-2013 at 11:56 AM.
  9. #9
    Desperatetime is offline Junior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by single317dad View Post
    I find it interesting that you remain here asking for legal advice, instead of going forth with the advice given (to get a lawyer to defend yourself against this criminal charge). It makes me wonder if you're actually the party in question, as that person would likely already have a lawyer.

    ETA: Based on your other thread, I also think you're at least bordering on adultery here. SC is one of the few states that still takes that seriously. Your husband may be waiting to get his case together for a fault-based divorce.
    I have spoke to several lawyers, given the fact I am going through a divorce, money is an issue. I have to apply for a Public Defender. You can never have too much information or opinions from knowledgeable people.

    Regarding our marriage, adultery is not an issue, considering we have been to court, agreed on grounds for divorce, there is no alimony or child support involved. We are both at fault. We both have the understanding we do as we please socially. After 29 years it is time to move on and try to enjoy life. . Therefore, I am trying to move forward. Yes SC is exactly as you stated. Thank you for pointing that out, that is not the situation in our case. My question is what happens if we have not agreed to settle by year end? Could you provide any information on that topic?
    Thank you so much.
  10. #10
    Desperatetime is offline Junior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Desperatetime View Post
    I have spoke to several lawyers, given the fact I am going through a divorce, money is an issue. I have to apply for a Public Defender. You can never have too much information or opinions from knowledgeable people.

    Regarding our marriage, adultery is not an issue, considering we have been to court, agreed on grounds for divorce, there is no alimony or child support involved. We are both at fault. We both have the understanding we do as we please socially. After 29 years it is time to move on and try to enjoy life. . Therefore, I am trying to move forward. Yes SC is exactly as you stated. Thank you for pointing that out, that is not the situation in our case. My question is what happens if we have not agreed to settle by year end? Could you provide any information on that topic?
    Thank you so much.
    Also, if I was guilty, I would not be trying to research this topic. I am trying to gather all information possible.
  11. #11
    Ladyback1 is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Desperatetime View Post
    Also, if I was guilty, I would not be trying to research this topic. I am trying to gather all information possible.
    FYI--guilty people do research all the time in order to find a defense strategy....So, researching is not necessarily something you can hang your innocence on.
  12. #12
    anearthw is offline Member
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    A domestic violence victim cannot simply send off a letter and take all the blame. That's the oldest 'trick' in the book that DV victims attempt to use - dime a dozen. Now, there are instances where he could recant everything, say he lied, whatever - but there are consequences to this as well, there is nothing as simple as just saying a sorry letter.

    You need a lawyer, as previously advised. His previous history of DV and his assault on you does not negate the charges that you are facing. Criminals can also be viewed as victims of acts too. You don't mess around here, you get a lawyer you who knows your case (PD or your own, whichever).

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