Sexually Abused As Child-Want To Sue-A little help?

[theirishavenger]

What is the name of your state? Colorado


Ok, here's the deal. From 1981-1988 I was sexually abused by my stepfather. Went to the cops in '88 (small town) who according to my mother did not believe my story and so threw the report in the trash basically. I was still a minor when I went to the police. Not knowing where to turn, we left it hanging there. My sister and brother were also victimized in the same manner.
Now I want to sue as I've learned that the criminal statute of limitations may've run out. My brother, sister, and mother most likely will not agree to participate in any legal proceedings as they wish to leave it lie. I do not wish to leave it lie, knowing that this person is most likely victimizing other kids. In fact, in his previous marriage there are two boys who he may have victimized- I'm almost sure of it. Here are my questions:

1.) What kind of lawyer do I need to look for?

2.) How much should I expect to spend, to see a legal action to the end? The perpetrator has almost no assets. He's not rich.

3.) What are the odds of winning given I probably won't get the rest of the family to help testify and corroborate each others' stories?

4.) Colorado currently has legislation underway regarding a change to sexual harassment laws. How will this affect me?


Thank you all very much for your help.

Chris

 

[Ohiogal]

First of all if the SOL has run you have no chance and would only waste money.
If he has no money what is your purpose? The only ones who can pursue criminal charges are the state. And again if the SOL has run they won't.
So pretty much ZIP.

 

[theirishavenger]

My purpose, first and foremost, is to keep him from victimizing other kids. Secondarily, I want monetary compensation for damages incurred by me, namely for the therapy I went to and emotional trauma.

You are right, the criminal SOL has almost certainly run out. But another poster on these forums told me some time ago that I could sue in a civil action. Is this not correct? Do statutes of limitations have a bearing on civil lawsuits? If I sue and win, how do they recover monetary damages assessed against the defendant?

Thank you again,

Chris

 

[rmet4nzkx]

My purpose, first and foremost, is to keep him from victimizing other kids. Secondarily, I want monetary compensation for damages incurred by me, namely for the therapy I went to and emotional trauma.

You are right, the criminal SOL has almost certainly run out. But another poster on these forums told me some time ago that I could sue in a civil action. Is this not correct? Do statutes of limitations have a bearing on civil lawsuits? If I sue and win, how do they recover monetary damages assessed against the defendant?

Thank you again,

Chris

Yes the SOL has run out for civil as well since you reported the acts to the police so you cannot claim that you recently discovered it as may sometime be the case. It is very possible there was no proof of your claim and thus nothing the police or DA could do. Just because you believe your other siblings were abused, doesn't make it so and that may be why your family doesn't support you in this action, nor took any action on your behalf. At that point in time there were many people making false claims of abuse, so it is not unusual for nothing to be done without strong evidence. At that point in time even some therapists encouraged, recovered memories, which were later proven to be false. Now if your claims are related to memories recovered in therapy, then you might have a cause of action or an administrative action against the therapist.

 

[rmet4nzkx]

Chris,
Upon review of your threads I am going to speak very strongly.
https://forum.freeadvice.com/showthread.php?t=158569 https://forum.freeadvice.com/showthread.php?t=205240
In these and another you first say that there is proof then that there is no proof, that you would like to kill your stepfather with a shotgun, you call yourself the avenger, you act out and take retribution, you get caught, then you try to actually buy a gun. If you had a valid case, something would have been done or you could have pursued it when you became an adult, no doubt, your counselors would have testified and that may be the problem. I believe you have some serious problems and need to seek counseling immediately re your homocidal ideations. THese are issues you need to take responsibility for, they are not the fault of your stepfather.

 

[theirishavenger]

Wow. I don't think I've ever seen anyone jump to as many conclusions as you have in the space of one post. Very impressive.

First off, I've used my nick, The Irish Avenger, a lot longer than since I've joined these forums. I use to use it quite a lot when I played online games, flight sims, roleplaying, whatever. I use it on forums I frequent for work, for email, etc, etc. etc. You assume too much when you assume I came up with it just for these forums, and you assume wrongly. It's just a superhero persona I came up with. Nothing more.

Two, while I understand and appreciate your concern for my "homicidal ideations" (by the way, thanks for the challenge with that word, ideations. I actually had to look that one up), I think you have completely misinterpreted the tone of most of my posts. I would never actually kill someone. It's stupid. Why would I risk going to prison? A 20 year sentence is sure as hell not worth it. Besides, if I wanted to get butt raped and molested again, I could just go back and contact my stepfather. At least that way I could sleep in my own bed at night. Am I angry? You bet. Do I fantasize a lot about all the ways I'd love to see him suffer a slow death? Hell yeah! Is going to prison worth putting the useless shell of a sick human being in the ground? Nope. I have way too much to lose now. Have no doubt, I'm not as unbalanced as you seem to infer.

I assume you read my posts on writing a book about my experiences and about buying a gun. Rest assured, the gun is out of the picture anyway, since they're way too expensive.
What really bothers me is that you have read all my past posts and formed an opinion of my character and my intent, and you have TOTALLY missed the mark. What also bothers me is that almost every response I get in these forums, when I dare post, is as if no one even read what I posted. If some of you are lawyers, your reading comprehension skills are no better than an eighth-grader's.

I guess we'll just let him go on until he dies, molesting whichever unlucky kids come into his path. Doesn't seem like many people here give a damn.

Thank you all for the "help".

 

[Happy Trails]

That's not true, a lot of us do give a damn.

I wish this had never happened to you, but it did. If there was something you could do about it now, we would tell you.

It's best for you to know that the SOL has expired, so you don't go throwing your money away.

If he is continuing to abuse others, hopefully someone will turn him in and he will get what he deserves.

I wish you the best, as no child should ever have to go through what you did.

 

[CdwJava]

Juvenile sex crimes are almost impossible to prove even when they are brought to the police almost immediately. When they involve allegations by a minor child without corroboration by medical professionals or witnesses, the case is almost always doomed. Without the aid of your family, even a civil suit which has a much lower burden of proof than a criminal matter will fail. The defense will explain that the family does not support you because it didn't happen ... you will argue that they don't support you because they don't want to rock the boat ... in either case, their silence will largely torpedo your case and it will come down to your word against his.

I DO understand the effects of molestation, and I understand the desire to get justice - even revenge, but you have to understand that the system is not going to side with the person with greater passion, it will go with the side with the greatest proof. It would seem that you have no proof. You might have something if the police still have the 18-year-old investigation, but this is highly doubtful.

And all of this is simply an exercise in futility if the SOL has passed.

I would encourage you to seek a consultation with an attorney that specializes in child molestation cases and see what he has to say. I suspect he will advise you the SOL has passed, and that even if it has not you have no case unless you can force your siblings and mother to testify against him through subpoena.

Good luck.

- Carl

 

[theirishavenger]

Happy Trails and CdwJava:


THANK you!!!!!!!!!!! THAT was the help I was looking for. You might want to go back and read my past posts-I've heard it said I'm a homicidal maniac with a penchant for bookwriting and gunplay. Eh, not so much. But I DID have that weird dream last night about the aliens, my genitals, and a garlic press. I think I'll go over and sign up for the Martha Stewart Hate Forums. We'll burn colanders and chant, "Down With Oregano!"

 

[Hypocritical]

I think I'll go over and sign up for the Martha Stewart Hate Forums. We'll burn colanders and chant, "Down With Oregano!"

Awesome! Sounds like a much better way to release anger.
http://i78.photobucket.com/albums/j92/Hypocritical_photos/applause8in.gif

 

[angelmama]

OP please check out this link. http://www.ccasa.org/resources.cfm There are sexual assault centers all around your state, and many if not all offer free counseling, ASAAC support groups and services for adults abused as children.