She's Using Domestic Violence as Leverage to Control Seven Tenants

[tylersbrown01]

I'm wondering if I can ask for legal advise on a matter affecting my living situation as well as that of 7 others in a house. Kinda torn right now and I think it would be a great benefit to know the legal implications before I talk to the landlord tomorrow afternoon.

There was recently a dispute between two tenants in our house, a guy and a girl. They didn't end up getting along, and they got into an argument which ended in the guy kicking her door and damaging it (but not opening it). She wants him out of the house but the rest of us want him to stay. She is threatening legal action. He wants to become a Navy Seal - which means he CAN NOT be charged with any type of serious legal action. The landlord tried to tell her to just leave herself because that would make the most sense - but she wants to stay. We are uncomfortable living with her now and also want to leave with the guy. She doesn't want the other six of us to leave, because she would have to find new people, and told us if we leave she will file legal action against the guy. So in a way we feel like we are being blackmailed to stay with her. We really want to stay in the house and just want her gone.The landlord wants her gone too because he would rather loose one tenant than seven.

Also, she is leaving to study abroad in 2 weeks for a span of three months, and I don't think she really feels she is in danger - she just doesn't get along with us. If she really was in danger - my thinking is she could just move out. This situation is even more strange because none of us have signed the lease yet - which is why I don't get why she doesn't just leave. My question for you is could she win this legal action? If so, how long would it take her? Would she even win anything? This happened at a party that she hosted & she has a keg purchased in her name & served drinks to minors so I don't think anyone would really win if she wanted to do this. I just want to figure out a way to be sure that she won't do this by telling her what this would involve - any hopefully she will realize that noone wins and just leave? But I need help! How can we get her to leave without worrying about my friends future career?

Sorry this is long, but I would really appreciate any advise - I am at a loss here about what to do.

 

[Proserpina]

I'm wondering if I can ask for legal advise on a matter affecting my living situation as well as that of 7 others in a house. Kinda torn right now and I think it would be a great benefit to know the legal implications before I talk to the landlord tomorrow afternoon.

There was recently a dispute between two tenants in our house, a guy and a girl. They didn't end up getting along, and they got into an argument which ended in the guy kicking her door and damaging it (but not opening it). She wants him out of the house but the rest of us want him to stay. She is threatening legal action. He wants to become a Navy Seal - which means he CAN NOT be charged with any type of serious legal action. The landlord tried to tell her to just leave herself because that would make the most sense - but she wants to stay. We are uncomfortable living with her now and also want to leave with the guy. She doesn't want the other six of us to leave, because she would have to find new people, and told us if we leave she will file legal action against the guy. So in a way we feel like we are being blackmailed to stay with her. We really want to stay in the house and just want her gone.The landlord wants her gone too because he would rather loose one tenant than seven.

Also, she is leaving to study abroad in 2 weeks for a span of three months, and I don't think she really feels she is in danger - she just doesn't get along with us. If she really was in danger - my thinking is she could just move out. This situation is even more strange because none of us have signed the lease yet - which is why I don't get why she doesn't just leave. My question for you is could she win this legal action? If so, how long would it take her? Would she even win anything? This happened at a party that she hosted & she has a keg purchased in her name & served drinks to minors so I don't think anyone would really win if she wanted to do this. I just want to figure out a way to be sure that she won't do this by telling her what this would involve - any hopefully she will realize that noone wins and just leave? But I need help! How can we get her to leave without worrying about my friends future career?

Sorry this is long, but I would really appreciate any advise - I am at a loss here about what to do.

If she genuinely feels threatened, then she feels threatened. Assuming that "threat = she'd move out, right?" is not logical.

You can't get her to leave. You do not have that power. Only a court - even with an unwritten lease - can decide the matter and it would be your landlord who would initiate such a suit. If he won't, you're all stuck with each other until someone breaks the impasse.

If you want my practical advice, the longer your friend stays there the worse it can get - if he's wanting a military life, he needs to get out of the situation before it even starts. If that means leaving now, so be it. I understand you feel it's unfair, but this is his future at stake and the repercussions could last far, far longer than finding somewhere else to live.

This is why we don't kick doors down.

 

[single317dad]

OP, what state are you in?

Depending on your jurisdiction, what the male roommate did may in fact be domestic violence. It may just be intimidation or destruction of property. If she was afraid to leave her room, the charge might be criminal confinement. It may be as simple as agreeing with the landlord to fix the door, or it could result in jail time. In my own state, for example, domestic battery requires physical contact and requires that the combatants are/were married, living together as a couple, or have a child in common. Other states vary.

Also dependent upon jurisdiction, what the female roommate is doing may be considered blackmail. That crime carries, for example, a one-year federal sentence, or 2-4 years in California.

Your roommate should take whatever measures necessary to control his anger issues. There's a reason the navy doesn't want hotheads in their special unit.

 

[tylersbrown01]

OP, what state are you in?

Depending on your jurisdiction, what the male roommate did may in fact be domestic violence. It may just be intimidation or destruction of property. If she was afraid to leave her room, the charge might be criminal confinement. It may be as simple as agreeing with the landlord to fix the door, or it could result in jail time. In my own state, for example, domestic battery requires physical contact and requires that the combatants are/were married, living together as a couple, or have a child in common. Other states vary.

Also dependent upon jurisdiction, what the female roommate is doing may be considered blackmail. That crime carries, for example, a one-year federal sentence, or 2-4 years in California.

Your roommate should take whatever measures necessary to control his anger issues. There's a reason the navy doesn't want hotheads in their special unit.

We are in the State of Washington. I do believe on the first day she felt threatened. There are multiple witnesses on both sides. She originally agreed to give him another chance, then the next day she changed her mind, saying she wants him out. The landlord has heard this and understands the damage. He doesn't think it is that big of a deal, but he said he is not a lawyer. The damage wasn't a problem for the landlord. The guy is already paying for it and getting it sorted.

I have a text from her saying that if we all continue to live with her and kick him out, she won't file any legal action. That's what made the rest of us uncomfortable. The last point I want to mention is that she was not getting along with him at this party before any real dispute occurred. They both were celebrating their birthdays and she was uncomfortable with a large party. She is 30 and the rest of us are 21/22. We feel this is more an issue of not getting along, however she is using the threat of "some legal action" as a way to try to get us all out.

I want to just say to her that nobody's going to get kicked out. We all are going to stay, and that if someone wants to leave, they can do so on their own power. The landlord wants this option as well because it is the easiest to resolve from his standpoint. We just are afraid that she might do something to our friend. She is going to travel abroad for the next three months and is leaving in two weeks. So I really don't think she has time to do this. What could she accomplish in 2 weeks? Would it really make sense for her to file protection against him, then leave the country? How would the court in Washington State view all this?

 

[cbg]

I find it curious that you are completely overlooking what your "friend" did to start all this, and are putting the whole blame for the situation on the woman who was attacked, with none on the one who attacked her.

And before you answer, yes, I realize it was "only" her door and he didn't touch her physically. That does not change the fact that she was the victim of an attack, and you seem to be holding her attacker blameless.

 

[Proserpina]

I find it curious that you are completely overlooking what your "friend" did to start all this, and are putting the whole blame for the situation on the woman who was attacked, with none on the one who attacked her.

And before you answer, yes, I realize it was "only" her door and he didn't touch her physically. That does not change the fact that she was the victim of an attack, and you seem to be holding her attacker blameless.

Yeap. The title of this thread says everything.

Truly.

 

[tylersbrown01]

Yeap. The title of this thread says everything.

Truly.

Okay, so I will try to clarify some additional information. We are in no way holding the guy blameless. He realizes what he did was wrong, and has apologized to her. Where the differences between us come is that we feel that he is a guy who made an honest mistake, where she feels that he could threaten her more. And we kinda feel like she is using domestic violence to get her way with the house. We all feel manipulated as roommates because as long as she threatens to file legal action we have to do what she says - which is that she doesn't want us moving out. We feel uncomfortable with this. A lot of us just don't feel comfortable with her anymore, but that doesn't change the fact that what he did was wrong.

I'm just trying to figure out what she could do in a two week period

 

[cbg]

Quite honestly? I'm on her side. An apology is in no way a guarantee that he won't do it again. I wouldn't feel comfortable having him there, either, especially with all my other housemates trying to blackmail me into protecting his Navy prospects instead of them protecting me.

 

[single317dad]

especially with all my other housemates trying to blackmail me

I don't see the housemates as the ones committing the blackmail. It seems to me that they all just want to move out to get away from this girl, and she doesn't want that because she'd be stuck with the rent on her own. She's the one coercing the entire group to stay and get rid of the violent transgressor.

Given only OP's version of the events, that is.

OP, Washington law defines domestic violence as virtually any criminal act committed by one housemate against another. Your friend could end up in a heap of trouble. For his own sake, I suggest he moves out and tries not to burn the next bridge he comes across.

Personally, if it were me, I would move out (assuming whatever lease agreement I had allowed me to do so) and let the other parties deal with their own issues. Whether Jane calls the police on Jack out of spite is not my problem.

 

[Ohiogal]

Okay, so I will try to clarify some additional information. We are in no way holding the guy blameless. He realizes what he did was wrong, and has apologized to her. Where the differences between us come is that we feel that he is a guy who made an honest mistake, where she feels that he could threaten her more. And we kinda feel like she is using domestic violence to get her way with the house. We all feel manipulated as roommates because as long as she threatens to file legal action we have to do what she says - which is that she doesn't want us moving out. We feel uncomfortable with this. A lot of us just don't feel comfortable with her anymore, but that doesn't change the fact that what he did was wrong.

I'm just trying to figure out what she could do in a two week period

An honest mistake is not behaving violently. The guy who made the "honest mistake" should be facing criminal charges. With your opinion, Ray Rice is just a guy who caressed his wife's cheek and it is her fault she passed out from it.