Stalking

[breezymom]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? NY

NY State Penal Code § 120.45 states that:

"A person is guilty of stalking in the fourth degree when he or she intentionally, and for no legitimate purpose, engages in a course of conduct directed at a specific person, and knows or reasonably should know that such conduct:

2. causes material harm to the mental or emotional health of such person, where such conduct consists of following, telephoning or initiating communication or contact with such person, a member of such person's immediate family or a third party with whom such person is acquainted, and the actor was previously clearly informed to cease that conduct"

Can anyone tell me if the following fits this definition:

My ex, first of all, has stated in family court that he has been talking to people of whom work at my place of employment concerning my "conduct at work." (I'm not quite sure what this means.)

Secondly, much to the person's dismay, a coworker observed a partial telephone conversation of another person in my area discussing my personal family court type of issues with a mutual acquaintance of my ex and myself of whom was seemingly trying to obtain information about me at work.

Thirdly, my ex was reaching for sympathy from a family friend of mine when she had to go into his place of work, and then proceeded to phone this woman after 10 pm, disturbing her sleep, to try and get information about my family.

Lastly, but much more menial, (to explain this one, visitation is through a program that provides an atmosphere where there is NO contact between my ex and myself, and that is the program's goal), he phoned me this afternoon, leaving a message on my voicemail to tell his 5 month old happy Thanksgiving. (In other words, he was hoping I would answer the phone so he could get whatever other information he could).

My lawyer has gotten an email of these occurrences, since it is the holiday and no one is in the office, but I was curious to know what folks think, since I don't feel like I can do some things as simple as go to work and do my job without his interference as well as enjoy the holiday with the family.

 

[JKBee]

This sounds like you need an anti-harassment order, not a stalker situation. I went to court on a stalker and had alot of success, but this was extreme in my case. Most of the times when you report stalking, police do little. I had to go to civil court, and I did win. This was well documented, though, including death threats, etc, which the police did document for me. That helped immensely in my stalking case. There was even a private detective hired to follow me. So unless you have repeated, and I mean repeated, documented facts here, go for a restraining order instead.

 

[Proserpina]

This sounds like you need an anti-harassment order, not a stalker situation. I went to court on a stalker and had alot of success, but this was extreme in my case. Most of the times when you report stalking, police do little. I had to go to civil court, and I did win. This was well documented, though, including death threats, etc, which the police did document for me. That helped immensely in my stalking case. There was even a private detective hired to follow me. So unless you have repeated, and I mean repeated, documented facts here, go for a restraining order instead.

Yup - but please be aware that not every state has such a civil remedy.

This site contains some interesting information:

Stalking Resource Center -- National Center for Victims of Crime - stalking laws/Civil Stalking Laws by State

 

[breezymom]

Thanks, both of you. There has been much, MUCH more than this, but I try to keep it limited because he does tend to search all over the internet about people from past relationships, so I wouldn't be surprised if he hasn't done that already and I don't want him to try and twist this around, as well. Have a happy holiday.

 

[Proserpina]

Thanks, both of you. There has been much, MUCH more than this, but I try to keep it limited because he does tend to search all over the internet about people from past relationships, so I wouldn't be surprised if he hasn't done that already and I don't want him to try and twist this around, as well. Have a happy holiday.

And peace to you, too!