Threatened and possibly being stalked.

[Justasking1234]

Last night my ex posted something on instagram about me. I nicely, kindly, texted him please can you not do that. He went off and threatened me. He called me every name in the book and then said that I shouldn't test him bc I don't know what him or his "people" are capable of when it comes to me and my fiance and that he'll have us touched.... And then he added, he doesn't care if my father is a cop, it's a war on cops now anyways." and don't F with him. Now this is not the reaction I expected bc we'd been on decent terms I just asked him not to talk badly about me online. I honestly expected him to just say it wasn't about me or something....anyways. I wasn't really worried about his threat. This morning I come into work and a guy comes in shady as hell and says he's there for pest services. I call the office manager and she has no recollection of calling anyone. Now this guy kept his back to me the whole time and kept checking his phone as he waited for the manager to call the landlord. Finally they let him in. He put 1 ant trap down and left. This guy looked exactly like someone my ex would be dealing with. It's to the point I'm having my fiance pick me up from work bc I'm scared to go outside. This could just be a coincidence but I am not about to take chances. I don't want to go to the police because things really could backfire on me. I mean I won't go to jail but things I don't need getting out could. Also I know that if I go to the police and he's arrested (in NJ threatening is illegal) he will send someone for us. How should I handle this situation. Should I just not talk to my ex anymore and just be careful for a couple weeks since he wasn't the one to originally contact me and I don't think he will again. Or should I take this more seriously?

 

[eerelations]

Did the landlord actually send a pest control service over to your office? If he did, then this has nothing to do with your ex and you shouldn't factor it into your issue.

As for the rest, yes you should most definitely not communicate with your ex in any way shape or form. If he attempts to communicate with you, save everything he texts/voicemails, and if it's threatening, call the police. I understand you said you didn't want to involve the police, but that's your only option for stopping his threatening behaviour (if it escalates to that).

 

[Justasking1234]

Did the landlord actually send a pest control service over to your office? If he did, then this has nothing to do with your ex and you shouldn't factor it into your issue.

As for the rest, yes you should most definitely not communicate with your ex in any way shape or form. If he attempts to communicate with you, save everything he texts/voicemails, and if it's threatening, call the police. I understand you said you didn't want to involve the police, but that's your only option for stopping his threatening behaviour (if it escalates to that).

He was on the phone with the landlord for all of 5 seconds and while I was sitting in the room it was very unclear if the landlord really knew. When I asked my boss all she said was "Well he talked to the landlord"....I'm like, that's not helpful. We don't know what the landlord said to the guy.

And yes, I'm going to let it go for now. But if he tries to contact me again (which i sincerly doubt he will, he wants nothing to do with me as you can see". I will be going to the police.

Thank you for your response.

 

[stealth2]

He was on the phone with the landlord for all of 5 seconds and while I was sitting in the room it was very unclear if the landlord really knew. When I asked my boss all she said was "Well he talked to the landlord"....I'm like, that's not helpful. We don't know what the landlord said to the guy.

And yes, I'm going to let it go for now. But if he tries to contact me again (which i sincerly doubt he will, he wants nothing to do with me as you can see". I will be going to the police.

Thank you for your response.

In your first post, you said the office manager called the landlord - did you actually ask the OM what the landlord said? It's now unclear to me who called who, who you asked, etc.

And why are you reading your ex's social media?

 

[Proserpina]

Last night my ex posted something on instagram about me. I nicely, kindly, texted him please can you not do that.

I'm sure you did.

He went off and threatened me. He called me every name in the book and then said that I shouldn't test him bc I don't know what him or his "people" are capable of when it comes to me and my fiance and that he'll have us touched.... And then he added, he doesn't care if my father is a cop, it's a war on cops now anyways." and don't F with him. Now this is not the reaction I expected bc we'd been on decent terms I just asked him not to talk badly about me online. I honestly expected him to just say it wasn't about me or something....anyways. I wasn't really worried about his threat. This morning I come into work and a guy comes in shady as hell and says he's there for pest services. I call the office manager and she has no recollection of calling anyone. Now this guy kept his back to me the whole time and kept checking his phone as he waited for the manager to call the landlord. Finally they let him in. He put 1 ant trap down and left. This guy looked exactly like someone my ex would be dealing with.

Explain the bolded. What characteristics should I be looking for? Do you have a list?

It's to the point I'm having my fiance pick me up from work bc I'm scared to go outside. This could just be a coincidence but I am not about to take chances. I don't want to go to the police because things really could backfire on me. I mean I won't go to jail but things I don't need getting out could. Also I know that if I go to the police and he's arrested (in NJ threatening is illegal) he will send someone for us. How should I handle this situation. Should I just not talk to my ex anymore and just be careful for a couple weeks since he wasn't the one to originally contact me and I don't think he will again. Or should I take this more seriously?

You don't want to take chances...

.... but you're perfectly fine judging someone based on the way they look?

Something is rotten in Denmark.

 

[single317dad]

my ex [...] I [..] texted him

Stop doing that. Leave him alone. He'll probably leave you alone as well. If he posts derogatory comments about you, either sue him or forget about it; don't play into the drama.

 

[stealth2]

Unless you have a child in common, there is no reason for either of you to be texting or reading one another's social media. Even with a child in common, there is no need to be doing the latter.