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Wanted away from abusive wife, but...

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finder222

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Ohio

Long story short, I'm married to an emotionally disturbed wife. In the past several months, she hit me, held a gun in her lap after I threatened to leave her, held a knife to my throat during a minor argument, put a pillow over my head and laid there for an hour.

She's never actually hurt me, but her behavior gets worse every time she loses it. She says she only does those things because she doesn't want me to leave her.

I now feel officially trapped. Now for my question:

I know I can receive a TPO, as I have recently started recording her episodes. The knife to the throat episode was recorded with sound only, but it's clear on the recording what was happening. She even knew I was recording her, which is creepy.

Anyway, the problem is she has a minor son who is not mine. My son is only with me on the weekends.

So, if I receive a TPO I will ask for her to be removed from our house, but I don't really want that for her son.

My only option is to get the TPO ad then take a few days of protection so I can move into an apartment. I will only take half the furniture, etc.

My fear is of I leave, what is to stop her from petitioning the court to order me to continue paying half of our mortagage? Will the TPO (with actual evidence) likely compel the court to not order me to continue paying the mortgage?

I understand I am still on the hook with our bank, but I really don't care anymore. I have to get away from her. I just can't afford a new apartment and half our mortgage. I make a bit more income than my wife, we have no children in-common and we've only been married a year.

Or, maybe I should seek her eviction with the TPO and not worry about her son. He is with us full time but I feel my son deserves a home too.

This was long, so my real question is can I feel safe renting an apartment without the court ordering I still pay part of our mortgage, considering I am leaving for provable cause?

I need to leave ASAP which is why I am seeking internet advice.
 


not2cleverRed

Obvious Observer
If you fear for your life, get the TPO. There is no reason to expect her behavior to improve under the current circumstances.

If you don't actually fear for your life, just are no longer into the drama, then try marital counseling.

Have you been filing police reports? No? Then it's going to be hard to prove anything. I don't care that you have a sound recording - that can be pretty easily contested by your wife. You were calm enough to record but not report - it's not an imminent threat.

Furthermore, if you wife's behavior is worthy of a TPO being granted, then maybe, just maybe, she shouldn't have custody of him.
 

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