Conservator

[catipper]

What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state? CT

My mother went into a home, as she has been declared incompetent. This took place quickly and my sister - without advice of attorney - applied for conservator of my mother and her estate. Only after she acquires the temporary papers from Probate did she call me and let me know. She told me she needed papers signed and that I did not contest it, she told the probate court that she could not find the Will, but she did have the Will and did not want them to see it as my mother had crossed out her name and wrote in our sister who has a mental handicap as well as physical problems. My mother had asked that the handicap sister get everything and it be set up in a trust fund for her. My mother wrote this on the will and singed and dated it not really knowing that this is not the right way. I went to an Elder law attorney and he advised us to have the over 50 sister reapply for SSD or SSI and she then would be entitled to at least part of the estate which now is in complete spend down, that it would be the only way to save any of the money from the home the mother is in, and that since probate court is now involved, even if my control sister was to decide she did not want to be Conservator, the court would just assign someone else. We felt this was fair, as the over 50 sister lived with and took care of my mother over the past few years and did endure a lot of abuse due to my mothers mental condition, we know that this sister can not work and support herself. The rest of us have jobs and good places to live. We did contact an attorney who does specialize in SSD and SSI and will meet with him next week. Now the sister who is in control of the estate and mother said she has found an attorney who can bend the rules and give her complete control of the money even tho it is under probate, she even said he was a crooked lawyer who can get her what she wants and the crossed out Will naming the sister for a trust fund, is not good so the whole thing would go to the control sister. She is totally against putting the younger sister on any disability and has even tried to get the sister to take a job of any kind knowing that it would certainly disqualify her for any benefits and that she would never be able to hold the job very long anyway.


The first elder law attorney was very honest and direct, but the control sister was very upset over his idea of putting the younger sister on disability, the elder lawyer said that the control sister has to answer to the court now. The control sister said she will not allow the disabled sister to get anything if she has a choice and since she is the conservator she feels she does have rights to the money first. My hope is that my mother lives for at least 5 more years that would certainly take care of the money grab problem. In the meantime we are trying to get the younger sister help but it does take at least 6 months for any disability to come in (if she does win her case). This is getting worst by the day and we are wondering if any such attorney can get the control of the court taken off and let the money be spent freely by the control sister? It is not that I want to control it, I just want it protected.

If you have any knowledge I would appreciate some insight on how the court views the authority of a Conservator.

Thank You

[rmet4nzkx]

Clearly your mother's intent was to set up a "special needs trust" for your disabled sister and the family situation waiting until the parent is incompent or dead before taking care of the special needs/disabled child is unfortunate and common. If your sister is not already on SSI or SSDI getting qualified is another, while many families take care of their own, not qualifying for SSI or SSDI early in life is a problem and some disabilities may not be diagnosed earlier in life. This will take time especially if the disability is not obvious or the person functioned well earlier in life. What is the nature of your sister's disability, this is needed so as to help direct you to specific support available.

You definately will need the services of an elder/disability attorney to handle the estate and it may be in your disabled sister's interest to have her own advocate, another reason for knowing the specific nature of the disability.

I can give you some links to groups who may be able to assist in applying for social security you will need this as applicaitons for older applicants who have been sheltered can be dificult and best to avoid the appeals process.

Here is a link to information about special needs trusts in your state [url]http://www.sharinglaw.net/disability/[/url]
Here is a link to [url]http://www.ilusa.com/links/ilcenters.htm[/url] they have many disability resources available and can help with SSD application and referals

[catipper]

CT

Thank you for your answer. We did contact an Elder attorney who advised us to contact a SSD attorney. The Elder attorney told us that if my sister was on SSD or SSI she would be able to secure some of the estate before all is spent. The SSD attorney does feel we have a case for her disability but we have to go over all the details yet with him next week.

My next question will be back to the Elder attorney if my sister does get SSD, what the proceedure would be. Keep in mind that she is the ONLY one who would be able to get anything from the estate and that it would go into a trust fund, that is just fine by me but my older sister said she will fight it, she fears that the younger sister might get it. That is why I would need to go back to the elder attorney to see if the older sister (who is the conservator of the estate now) keep the younger one from getting anything.

We hope to at least get her on SSD even if the older sister is somehow able to keep her from getting any estate settlement. This is what happens when an older person does not take care of the child in a legal form, another child can step in and try to take it all with no consideration to what the parent wanted, it can be very sad to see it all go on while the parent's assets fall into the control of the one who wants to steal it. A lesson that everyone should consider.

[rmet4nzkx]

Without the specific nature of your sister's disability it will be difficult to advise and she may well need her own attorney to look out after your mother's interest and something done while your mother is still alive,

[BlondiePB]

Though I believe I do know the answer to the following, I'll ask anyway. Without a VALID will, won't OP's mother, upon passing, have died intestate and then estate be distributed evenly among survivors?

catipper,
Are you going to contest the conservatorship? Conservators, like guardians, must provide a complete accounting to the court. They MUST account for EVERY penny coming in and going out. Accounting reports must balance to the penny. Disabled sister would benefit by having an advocate.

[catipper]

Originally Posted by rmet4nzkx

Without the specific nature of your sister's disability it will be difficult to advise and she may well need her own attorney to look out after your mother's interest and something done while your mother is still alive,

We first had seen an Estate attorney to find out what a conservatorship would be. We recently have seen an SS attorney and he feels the case is very good and has taken it on. It is a long road but still a good one. My mother does have an attorney as when my control sister had her committed on a temporary conservatorship the probate court assigned an attorney to my mother. Now keep in mind this all took place within 8 days and my sister never notified anyone else this was going on until she optained the temp conservatorship. Once we were notified by the court that there was a request for this we did not contest it as we felt we all knew this was best and that we all knew of mothers wishes. Only later on did we find out that the control sister was absolutely against the younger disabled sister to get any of the estate frozen if she were on SS and that she said she had found a lawyer who would help her gain completely control of the money. Now that we have gotten an attorney on the SS case we have had to be quiet about it so that we do not flame up the control sister into doing something that would be very dangerous. It will take a long time to process the SS case as it is, and at least in the meantime my mother is being taken good care of in the medical center. The feed back from the forum is that control sister has limits on the spending of the money and there might be a way we can watch it without her knowing, we do not want to get into a big legal issue with her as she feels that the money is due her and we do not want to push her into feeling that the money might be split between mothers care and one siblings needs, as this would clearly not leave much for her. Talking with others on the forum has been very helpful. Thank You.