child right in custody

At what age does a child get to chose who they get to stay with?? My 13 year old son whants to stay with me but doesn't know how to go about it or if he can chose.

[I AM ALWAYS LIABLE]

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by robert II:
[b]At what age does a child get to chose who they get to stay with?? My 13 year old son whants to stay with me but doesn't know how to go about it or if he can chose. [/b]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

My response:

There is no "magic" age for this. The court often questions a young teenager to determine their motivations, and depending on age, their motivations change. Judge's hear everything from, "My Mom (or Dad) is more fun to be with" to "I would like to live with my Mom (or Dad) because it would make getting to school easier." You see, it all depends on the reasons, and their age, and judges are very keen to childhood "motivations." For example, it may have been that you could have made visits with your son very enjoyable and fun (as well as they should be) and a judge will be able to discern whether the child thinks he or she wants to live with the non-custodial parent because the child wants "more fun." But Mom could have made your child "tow the line" (get your homework done, or go to bed at 9:00 p.m.) which is absolutely essential and necessary to the well-being and upbringing of a child. To a child, that's not fun, and judges know this.

You'll have to go to court for any change in circumstance; e.g., changes in custody.

My take on this: At the ripe old age of thirteen, it's not going to happen. Perhaps at 15 or 16, but I don't really hold any hope for a child who thinks he can change a judge's mind at that age.

That's my opinion. Any others?

IAAL

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[MySonsMom]

Oh how I would love to state my opinion on this matter. I agree with IAAL..a child will choose which place is more "fun". If I only had my child every other weekend or whatever, I would sure hope my home was more "fun" then the others. I also feel that once you allow a child to choose, it starts a cycle..child getting mad because then Dad turns into a "strict parent" and all of a sudden it isn't all fun and games anymore. Then he wants to move back with Mom. It starts a cycle that is hard to handle...and no fun for anyone involoved. Unless there are true reasons for the child to move to the other parents home...real reasons like abuse, neglect, problems with "that home" then that is when it should be approached..but if there is no serious reason to change homes then no need. That's my opinion.