A
alaska
Guest
A lot of advice needed...
History... My husband and I are wanting to call it quits after 8+ yrs. We purchased a house together and agreed to sell it if our marriage didn't work out. Now he's saying he wants to keep the house and I can have to children. He feels, he's made the most money, (to invest in the house) worked the hardest around it to make it the way we want and that he's entitled to it because I had an affair 2 yrs ago and he didn't leave me, then. (It was an one-nighter.) Anyway, this house is both of our investment our childrens home. I refuse to see the day another woman come into my home and try to fill the role that I played in my home, with my children. Please don't get me wrong, I don't care about my husband getting remarried to whomever and living wherever and however. I just don't want them in our house!! And I don't want the house for the same reason. I think that's where the first conflicts begin between the children and new stepparent.
Here's my dilemma... I don't want him to have the house, I want the sell it (but not to him). I really don't care about the furniture, etc. (although I'd like mine and my children bedroom sets and clothes). And I want custody of my children with child support and his visitation rights. But he sais if I don't let him have the house, then he's going to fight me for the kids, house, furniture, etc until I run out of money or get so tired of fighting that I just let him have everything... he has the resources and will to do just that. Don't get me wrong, I'm not afraid to fight, I'm just afraid of lossing my kids. I know I don't make a great deal of money like he does and will have a very hard time in the beginning making ends meet. But I feel it's time to go. I need to get me and my kids out of this very bad situation.
If I move out of my home right now, will I forfeit my chances of lossing half of what I invested and getting him out from some sort of abandonment? What should I do first, second and third?
Sincerely
A Lot Desperate
History... My husband and I are wanting to call it quits after 8+ yrs. We purchased a house together and agreed to sell it if our marriage didn't work out. Now he's saying he wants to keep the house and I can have to children. He feels, he's made the most money, (to invest in the house) worked the hardest around it to make it the way we want and that he's entitled to it because I had an affair 2 yrs ago and he didn't leave me, then. (It was an one-nighter.) Anyway, this house is both of our investment our childrens home. I refuse to see the day another woman come into my home and try to fill the role that I played in my home, with my children. Please don't get me wrong, I don't care about my husband getting remarried to whomever and living wherever and however. I just don't want them in our house!! And I don't want the house for the same reason. I think that's where the first conflicts begin between the children and new stepparent.
Here's my dilemma... I don't want him to have the house, I want the sell it (but not to him). I really don't care about the furniture, etc. (although I'd like mine and my children bedroom sets and clothes). And I want custody of my children with child support and his visitation rights. But he sais if I don't let him have the house, then he's going to fight me for the kids, house, furniture, etc until I run out of money or get so tired of fighting that I just let him have everything... he has the resources and will to do just that. Don't get me wrong, I'm not afraid to fight, I'm just afraid of lossing my kids. I know I don't make a great deal of money like he does and will have a very hard time in the beginning making ends meet. But I feel it's time to go. I need to get me and my kids out of this very bad situation.
If I move out of my home right now, will I forfeit my chances of lossing half of what I invested and getting him out from some sort of abandonment? What should I do first, second and third?
Sincerely
A Lot Desperate