father thinks he has total control over 8yr old son

divorced in california , mom has Joint Legal and Joint Physical Custody, but child lives with dad for the school year and with mom for the summers and some holiday time.Iam here in Sacramento only until this November , my question is, at my childs school, Iam not on the emergency card that would allow me to pick up my son whenever father and step mom cannot,the father only attached a note to the back of the card stating that Iam to pick up my son only on every other friday, so if by giving the school my address and phone number on a seperate emergency card and a copy of our divorce decree stating that we both have Joint Physical custody ,can the school allow me to pick up my son even without fathers permission? thank you for reading my post, brenda

[MySonsMom]

I'm confused, when you have joint physical custody, that means that each parent has the same amount of time with the child. You are saying that you have him in the summer, and a few times during the year? That's not joint physical custody, you may have joint custody but that's not joint PHYSICAL custody. Maybe you can explain more. About the picking up from school, if the Father has the child in his care he can say who can and can't pick the child up..you have no control over that..

------------------
**MySonsMom**
~There is no love like the unconditional love of a Mother~

Its confusing to me to, I thought when I signed these papers that Joint physical ment that we both take turns sharing custody of my son, but i guess because it had written that the father be primary custodial parent, that i guess gave him more rights than me, which at the time i signed to this, i had no help and did not think that tittle ment anything, boy was i ever nieve- i regret signing to this day, because now it has been a fight trying to talk dad into letting me share some of my sons school years. well since then the father has enrolled my son in school and has the title primary custodial parent , even though it also says Joint Physical and Legal custody. I have every other weekend while son is in school, the father made sure to put a note saying that along with the emergeny contact card, so since the dad told the school only i pick him up every other friday, will the school have to release him to me, because we share Joint physical or do they have to follow dads note.? thanks again for reading my post..brenda

[MySonsMom]

If you are to pick the child up from school on Fridays for your visitation, you are entitled to do so and the school should allow it. As far as any other day of the week, you are not entitled to pick him up without the Fathers' permisssion. And if you do try to, it may and probably will cause problems. If you X was granted Custodial parent, then yes he is the parent the child lives with, and you are entitled to your every other weekend visitation. No more, no less unless something is worked out between you two parents.

------------------
*There is no love, like the unconditional love of a Mother*

-I am not an Attorney, any advice given is strictly advice-