International Parental Child Abduction and the Hague Convention

[james filmer]

My eight and one-half year old daughter was abducted to Germany from CA -USA. The mother, my wife of one and one-half years(I filed for divorce immediately after the abduction) lied to the jurisdictional family court to obtain temporary custody. She was prohibited by standard family law restraining orders from leaving the state. The US court order her back to my custody under the Hague Convention. The jurisdictional family court in Germany ordered her returned. The German appeals court delayed its decision for ridiculous reasons and returned the decision that ignored CA, US and its own lower family court laws saying the mother did nothing wrong. I await word from the German Embassy through a Congressman after I declared to the US and German governments and the following parties, Estoppel by Laches. All aspects of the case are thoroughly documented. The White House, the UN, the Gov.office(CA),the State Dept,and many others have full details but I can no longer afford an attorney, and don't know how to find the right specialist.I have overwhelming evidence of estoppel by laches against the parties to the Hague and Germany. What do I do now? I sacrificed my intl. business, my life, everything I had for my daughter. (And I need that divorce final)

 

[Been There Mom]

While I know that there is nothing more hurtful and frightening than being a left behind parent, please take heart. You may have tried some of these avenues, but since you didn't mention them, I will suggest them.

First, The International Center for Missing and Exploited Children has great resources. For starters, they have lists of non-profit agencies that may be able to help in securing pro-bono legal assistance. If nothing else, they can connect you with people and organizations that can give you moral and emotional support. This support can be the most valuable gift you can receive. You must remember that in order to help your daughter, you have to be as strong as you possibly can be. They can also help you with prepratory counseling for the eventual reunification with your daughter. It is sad to say, but once your child is home, the trauma will linger and have potentially serious long term ramifications.

Another step is to use the State Department Bureau of Citizens Affairs. Even if you have a lawyer, it is worthwhile to contact them and see what services, assistance or ideas they have to offer. Each country, or region of the world has an officer assigned, so these people are very famaliar with the particulars of each country. Of course, they will advise you to follow Hague Convention guidelines and to secure a lawyer in Germany, but take the list of lawyers anyway. The people they have on their lists are famaliar with these issues and may be able to help point you to pro bono assistance locally.

A couple of agencies that I have been famaliar with in the past are:

Child Quest International, Inc
San Jose CA 408 453 9601

Interstate Association for Stolen Children
Rancho Cordova CA 916 631 7631

These are both non-profits, and have excellent resources. The phone numbers may be old, but it would be worth it to follow through with them.

Additionally, there are a couple of International Organizations that are definitely worth contacting. The Missing Children International Network in Brussels is one. Reuint: National Council for Abducted Children in London is another. This organization does have a web site and they may be the best sourct of help in using Interpol. The usefulness of Interpol cannot be discounted, especially if there is a chance that your wife will attempt to travel in Europe with the child. They are capable of flagging a passport or identity card, and notifying you when the child has left Germany. You would need to have the paper work in order, but, once the child is outside of Germany, you can then 'claim' the child and return her to the US.

Finally - there is an organization that can help with the financial burden, but they do have strict guidelines. They are Future Vision in Las Vegas, NV - 702 253 7528.

Again, some of these organizations may have changed their contact information, but it may be worth a shot. Good luck to you, and I will continue to watch the posts to see how you are doing.

 

[Ukiah]

Is your 8 yr old daughter in common with your wife of 1 1/2 yrs? If not why did she take a child that is not hers to Germany? If I were you, I would not wait anylonger, I would find a way to get to Germany and find my child and bring her home. But that's just me, I'm impatient and can't stand the lazy efforts of others.

Good Luck,

Ukiah

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All that you have read in no way is Legal Advice, it is a matter of opinion to help you in your quest

 

[Been There Mom]

James -

Please do not do anything rash, as was suggested by the previous post. Yes, it can be VERY difficult to follow proper channels, but the reasons are just 'mildly' important. Such as, if there is an existing court order in Germany, wrongly filed or not, you will be charged with international abduction yourself. If you are lucky enough to get the child out of Germany, and of Europe, you can be extradited BACK to Germany and face criminal charges. Just think of what will happen if you are caught in their country! You think you have legal bills now?

There are organizations, some even posted on the Web, that will offer to 'counter-abduct' your child and bring her home. Of course, the cost is immense. And their methods are usually VERY illegal and DANGEROUS. This option would only be viable if the child's life was in imminent danger in the current situation. Otherwise, as a loving parent, how do you justify putting her life in danger yourself? Additionally, some of these groups have had members caught in the process and are currently serving prison terms in other countries, including Iceland, Sweden, Italy and Germany. And those are just the ones with which I am famaliar.

Having faced a very similar situation, I understand the pain, frustration, helplessness and rage of being the left behind parent. Everytime I was feeling rash or impulsive, I reminded myself of a few simple facts. First, if it was wrong, illegal, immoral, hurtful to the child for the other parent to take the child it is equally wrong for me to do the same.
Second, I need to be able to look my child in the eye when he is 15, 16, 17 years old, old enough to truly understand what is going on, and honestly state that I did nothing, absolutely nothing illegal or immoral; that I did everything in his best interests. The lesson here is that ultimate good can only be served (in my situation) by abiding by both the spirit and the moral intent of the law.

Of course, different rules would apply if my child were in imminent danger, in a war torn country, or being abused or neglected. Other situations require very careful consideration because it must be remembered that even the best, safest, most necessary counter-abduction is an incredible trauma to a child. Yes, the initial abduction was traumatic, but a second abduction would just compound the trauma.

Finally, James, you need to seriously look into counseling for the time when your daughter is returned to you. There will be many issues to deal with and having already established contact with professionals that can help guide you now will both serve your child then and you in the interim. A professional counselor can even help you handle the very delicate first moments of reunification, moments when you will be most emotional but need to be most in control of yourself so that you can help your daughter best.

Again, I wish you the best. If you have not already done so, please contact some of the organizations I have listed above. You are not alone in facing this issue and there are other's experiences that will be able to help you. It will be a fine day indeed when all of us who have been through this have no need to give the benefit or our experiences.