My step-son wants to live with me and his father, but is he old enough to choose?

I finally got to see my SS this sunday, it has been a year since I last seen him because his mother and grandmother moved and did'nt tell my husband where. It took my husband and I a year to find him but, now that we found him my husband wants to establish a good relationship with his son.

When we arrived My husband told my ss to change his clothes so he can take him out to lunch, he ran inside to change only to come back out to say that his mother told him no, He started to cry, she came out and told us that he was'nt allowed to go with us because she didn't want me near her son! My husband approached his son and told him not to cry, that no matter what his mother says he will always love him, then she changed her mind and decided to let him go. whild waiting for him his uncle uncle erik told us some horror stories regarding my ss mother and grandmother, that they were always hitting and yelling at him with the belt because he's always asking for his dad. He said that when he's around he tries to protect him by sticking up to my ss mother and telling her to stop hitting him.
My husband is really concerned and can see that his son is afraid of his mother, my ss is 7 years old, is he old enough to live with his father and I? when he was with us he was very loving and calm he even told me that he missed me and gave me a big hug.
He knows that his father and I love him very much and as his step mother I just want the best for him, just because he's not my son does'nt mean that I cant love him as if he was. can you tell me the laws regarding custody in New Jersey. Thank you.


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partyofsix26

Did you file police reports about the disappearence of the child and his mother?. Did you go to court to inform them that the mother had taken the child from his resident home and disappeared ?...

The actions you describe would give him grounds to gain full custody. Consult an attorney.

Most important of all... DOCUMENT everything and get as much proof and evidence as you can. Get eyewitness statements to the beating and also any statements that the mother is trying to turn the son against his father. These are ALL grounds for a change of custody.