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need help determining what is "FAIR"

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i want to be fair-in trying to establish settlement agreement/and arguing with husband about separate/marital property, i need advice......we have a 13yr. son....1 home purchased 3 mts. b4 marriage, married now 17yrs...was not maintained as a separate property, and no way for me to prove i contributed to premarital deposit now 17 yrs. later...we have a life insurance policy w/cash value 25,000, a dingy boat/trailer and 2 cars, in separate names....however, i gave him $5000 to purchase his jeep as downpayment...do i have to uproot my son- get out, sell house and argue my 1/2 equity in property; do i ask for house and child support till 18, and then spousl support ?and let him keep all else? or do we get out and just split it up and his child and i try to live on $200 month child support and whatever i am able to get from 1/2 house equity?? any suggestions on what i should approach him with as a FAIR settlement, with me having our son to raise?? Husbnd dserted us 2 yrs ago, has paid mortage and let us "stay" in our home.....now wants Separation agree/////only agreeing to let us stay in HIS separate property till son 18 and we get out, i sign off with 0!!says, his paying mortage payment is child support. Which, it is, however, his separate mortgate payment, is little compensation for 17 yrs marriage and still many years left to raise our son! help please....VIRGINIA
 


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paula2

Guest
I am not sure about your state, but I believe before I sign anything, I would get an attorney. After 17 yrs, I believe you are entitled to 1/2 the house, because he bought only 3 months prior to the marriage and any judge would assume he did so to provide a home for his finace, and future family. Had he owned for a few years before, there could be a question about it. Until a formal seperation agreement is drawn up and his name is on the mortage(is your name on the mortage?) then he is obligated to pay the mortage and utilities in the house if they are in his name as well. And until a child support order has been issued by the court, he does not have to pay it. If you are not legally seperated then he is obligated to provide for your child, in ways such as food, shelter, utilities, etc., if he is not, then this will not look good on him in the courts eyes. He is still obligated to do this until a final judgement is awarded.

As far as what you are entitled to, after 17 yrs., you would also be entitled to part of his retirment or pension as well. The court will probably award you 1/2 the savings, one of the cars, and may require that your husband either pay you for your half of the boat/trailer or sell it and give you 1/2. These are questions you really need to seek the advice of an attorney on before signing anything. An attorney will be able to tell you exactly what you are entitled to and there may be things your husband doesn't want you to know that you may be entitled to. Please, seek the advice of an attorney first.

Good Luck and God Bless.
 

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