Need Help Please Anyone!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My ex and I divorced in 1993 and I have physical custody of the children. We have joint legal and reasonable visitation.

In 1991 my ex was charged with Criminal Sexual Conduct 3rd degree of my fifteen year old cousin. He has played some pretty dirty tricks on me. I know he wants custody of the children as he doesn't want to pay child support.

My question is, if he has this CSC on his record and I were to take him back to court for Supervised visits, what are my chances of winning?

My children have been in counseling several times because they were taught some inappropriate sexual behavior and we don't seem to know who exactly taught them this. They aren't saying my ex did however, I don't know. One thing I do know, is that my children go over there every other weekend and 5 and a half weeks in the summer and they have said that my ex's wifes little sister (11yr) has tried to get them to play these inappropriate games and tells them she will get them in trouble if they don't. I sent my ex a letter by certified mail-return receipt explaining this, and asked that he ensure this behavior doesn't continue while they are with him. He took the children down to the police department and had a deputy question the children. Children come home saying: Mom we lied to the police. I think my chin hit the floor. I asked why, they said because dad said if we kept it up we would go to foster homes. Maybe dad is trying to hide something? I don't know what to think. I try to look at this from several different perspectives and truly I don't want to think dad would ever do something like that however, I DON'T KNOW.

I AM HERE TO PROTECT MY CHILDREN AND I WILL DO WHAT I FEEL I NEED TO TO SEE THEY ARE NOT BEING HARMED.

Please any advice would greatly help.

Thank you.

My prayers go out to you and your children tonight. I understand what you are going through. I'm some what in the same situation, just a little backwards than yours. My ex wants my daughter because he doesn't like my new husband because now my ex can't boss me around with me having a husband that stands up for me and gets in my ex's face. My husband has a theft felony on his record from before me and now my ex is trying to take my daughter because of it. What you need to do first and foremost is have the children evaluated by a child psychiatrist. pick a gender that the children feel most comfortable with. Sometimes children can talk to a stranger they start to feel comfortable with better than they can their parents. With the stranger, they don't worry as much about reprecutions to what they say. I am no lawyer, but I have been dealing with this stuff for the past 3 to 4 months. Then take him back to court. File under "motion to modify" saying that you want to modify the visitation rights he has. The psychiatrist's evaluation will play a big role in your defense. The biggest thing is, making the children aware that they won't get in trouble for telling the truth. I know that's hard for them to believe when they still have to go to his house. My ex is currently trying to buy my daughter. He's got her brainwashed almost into thinking that my husband is the worst human on the planet. If you haven't gotten an attorney, that would also be a very good idea. It's not a bad idea to be the first one to file something on the other. That's a lesson I learned the hard way. Sorry to ramble. I hope some of my advise helped. God bless and keep you safe.

Please be very careful here, mentioning any kind of sexual misconduct is walking on thin ice when it comes to child custody matters. You could be in big trouble if you word this the wrong way and the Judge takes it wrong.

I guess I don't see how that could be held against me. I wasn't the individual who was convicted of a CSC charge. I believe that could be damaging to him in a custody situation as a morality issue. I have never been in trouble for anything. Anything he has done in the vicious circle eventually affects the children. Morals speak highly in child rearing. That is my opinion. How do see it being an issue that would offend the judge? Please advise.

[usmcfamily]

Hi, sorry to butt in but think maybe I can help clarify......you mentioned in your original post that your ex was CHARGED with CSC.....was he convicted??? This is important because if the conviction went through then in COULD be useful to you inregards to the safety of the children with him, HOWEVER--- if he was only charged and never convicted and you try to bring that in the judge COULD take it as you being vindictive and grasping at straws. Unfortunately for the honest people out there, the family courts are riddled with false claims of sexual abuse by one parent or another trying to gain the upper hand and this has caused a VERY cautious attitude among judges in regards to such allegations. That would be how it could work against you- if you bring it out in court and the judge takes it the wrong way (i.e. never convicted therefore unsubstantiated claims) it could look bad for you. Just a thought.
our prayers are with you and your family.

My ex was convicted in 1991 of CSC 3rd degree with my 15 yr old cousin. He served 5 months in a prison up North. I was still with him through his prison term. It wasn't an unsubstantiated claim. thank you for your reply.