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NOT MARRIED AND WANT TO LEAVE TO NEW STATE WITH CHILD

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HONEYEYES00

Guest
I AM NOT MARRIED TO MY SON'S FATHER.MY SON IS 22 MONTHS OLD AND I WANT TO LEAVE THE STATE OF NEW JERSEY AND MOVE TO FLORIDA.WHERE MY IMMEDIATE FAMILY RESIDES. HE HAS ASKED ME TO LEAVE IN THE PAST AND I'VE GONE AND RETURNED AFTER HE ASKED ME BACK. THIS HAS HAPPENED ABOUT 5-10 TIMES IN 3 YEARS. I DON'T WANT TO CONTINUE THIS WAY SO I WANT TO LEAVE PERMANENTLY, BUT I AM AFRAID HE WILL NOT ALLOW ME TO LEAVE WITH MY SON.WHAT ARE THE CHANCES THAT I WON'T BE ALLOWED TO LEAVE?AND THAT HE WILL MAKE ME STAY IN THE STATE EVEN THOUGH I HAVE NOONE HERE? NOTE:WE LIVE TOGETHER AND I'M AN AT HOME MOM. PLEASE ADVISE!!!!
 


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Tigres

Guest
Honey, take the caps lock off, it's annoying! :)

Yes, he could stop you from going. You also need to give him advanced notice that you will be moving from the state. On the other hand, if he asks you to leave, tell him to give it to you in writing (he can't deny he knew then) that you are going and taking the child with you. Problem is, you can't file for custody until you have established residence in your new state (Florida requires 6 months I believe.).

So, do you have a Florida license? How long have you lived in the state of New Jersey? I am inclined to ask, perhaps I am wrong, but is there some sort of abuse going on?

Tig



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<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face=" Arial, Verdana, Helvetica">quote:</font><HR>
I am not a lawyer. Any information relayed is merely my own experience or research.

"PRINCESS, HAVING HAD SUFFICIENT EXPERIENCE WITH PRINCES, SEEKS FROG."
<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
 
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honeyeyes00

Guest
Hi. Thanks for the response. There is absolutely no abuse. He is a pretty good dad and a good provider, but we came into the relationship very quickly we known each other for 3 years and my son is almost 2 so you do the math. It just isn't working out in the past he has asked me to leave and I've asked him to work it out and we have done so for a little while, but then the problems arise again. We have a civil relationship and hardly argue, and if we do it is never in front of my son. It was just too much too fast. I have not lived in florida for 3 years before that i lived there for most of my life I am 24. please advise.
 
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Tigres

Guest
Unfortunately, for your plans to be legally viable and acceptable, you have to notify him 30 days prior to removing the child from the state. This gives him time to file something in court to prevent you from doing so. That is going to confuse matters as even if he allowed you to take the baby, you would still have to wait 6 months in Florida before that date would have jurisdiction.

So, you could move, with his permission and then just as your getting settled in and started your brand new job (that you love and it pays well and you don't dare risk losing it!) he files for full custody in New Jersey. Of course, you can still fight that, but you would have to get an attorney in New Jersey and I would definitely recommend showing up to boot!


Anyway, if you are not sure you want to end it completely, you could always tell him you just wanted to clear your head and do some soul searching. (It would still be a good idea just in case to show proof that he knew you were moving and gave his permission.) Then, if you decide that you do want to go through with ending the relationship completely, you would have a head start on the residency requirements.

On the other hand, if you intend to move back to Florida, take a trip back with some of your things, get your license changed to a Florida license and by all means start setting up means to have a domicile there. Once you have done that, as long as you follow through with it, it starts the 6 month countdown for you.

Realistically, I would suggest doing that and then sorting out if he would give you temporary custody.

There's so much that is difficult because you are living together and you intend to move to another state. It would be much easier if you hadn't lived in NJ for so long!

Wish you luck

Tig


------------------
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face=" Arial, Verdana, Helvetica">quote:</font><HR>
I am not a lawyer. Any information relayed is merely my own experience or research.

"PRINCESS, HAVING HAD SUFFICIENT EXPERIENCE WITH PRINCES, SEEKS FROG."
<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
 
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navywife_tx

Guest
I agree with Tigres, when my ex and i split up i was told by my lawyer that i could not take our daughter out of state without his permission b/c neither of us had sole custody of her. The lawyer told me that i was allowed to move only within 100 miles from him. She did however tell me that there was nothing wrong with taking her on a "vacation" over the state line. I would listen to the advice given by Tigres.
 
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sarah3488

Guest
You do not need his permission. Providing there is no pending court action then you just have to give them 30 days written notice.
 
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HONEYEYES00

Guest
Thank You for your replies. I told you I have lived here in New Jersey, but that is false. We have lived here in this house in New Jersey for a year and 4 months. Prior to that we lived in New York for a little less than a year and before that we lived seperately. Does that make a difference at all? The fact that we have lived in 2 states instead of living here in New Jersey for 3?Thank You for your advice...
 

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