thank you dawn marie for your reply. I thought noone was listening! The last thing I want is a divorce and I have told him this. All I want is for him to get a job, get some health insurance, get a life insurance policy, and stop living beyond his means. This must seem terribly overwhelming for him because he just won't do it. I have been asking the same things for nearly 4 years. I thought after the bankruptcy things would change, after getting out from under the bone-crushing debt that he would see he didn't have to find a job that paid big bucks, just some ordinary middle income job. He just refuses to do it. It's like he thinks I'm expecting way too much and being totally unreasonable. How am I the bad guy in this? Seeing an attorney is the last thing I want to do, but living this way is really making me lose respect for the man I thought would always take care of his family. Thanks again for your reply!