question of paternity

My 22 year old son and my 1 yr old grandson are staying with me in TN. My son had gotten involved with a married woman and they lived together for about a year and a half. During that time they had a child together. Since the child was born they have split up and the mother left the child with my son. She has not given any support either financially or otherwise to help with care of the baby. She has only seen the child once in the last 4 months since they have been apart. My son has been trying to get her to take a paternity test so he can establish that he is the father. At this point he has nothing legal and cant even take his child to a DR. My son wants to have legal custody since the mother doesnt seem to care at all about her child. He has been trying to contact her to try and work this out but she has had friends threaten to do him bodily harm if he doesnt leave her alone. What is the first step he should take. Will he be able to have any legal rights to this child since the mother is still legally married to someone else. thanks

Contact your local child advocate office, they should be able to give you advice as well as possibly help. This service is usually free of charge. Your son may also be able to get custody on grounds of abandonment. Child advocate will know. And they will also go after her for child support as well as medical care and expenses and child care if he is working. Depending on your state laws they should also issue a court order for DNA test to establish paternity. In most states if she is married when the child was born, the husband is automatically considered the father and has all rights, unless you or she request DNA test. The judge would then decide, if the child is yours, who pays for it, you or her. Hopefully her if you are caring for the child.

Good luck. We need more men like your son, who are willing to be a parent.

amen sister (regarding the last comment made)
the last response is correct at least for most states that if the child was born while the women was still married then the child automatically "belongs" to the husband. you can take her (the husband) to court to force a paternity test. if the child is proven to be your son's then your next step would be custody. from the sounds of it your son should not have a problem getting it but the system can be screwy at times. the third step would be child support. probably easy to be ordered sometimes difficult to collect. maybe your son would like to teach a class to other men. there a too few men out there willing to face their responsibilities. good for him.