threatening words

My Hussband & I are 2 mo. into a divorce with a 4 yr. old daughter. I left due to verbal & physical abuse.he is coming over every night now 7 my daughter is inviting him in. this is o.k.as long as he doesn't cause trouble. My concern is; he is making remarks like:"if you don't want me around, my daughter & I will leave." I haveprimary physical custody and joint legal custody (we have both signd papers0. i feel like he is threatening me. he is being nice as long as i allow him to comee in the home with us, but whenever i say anything to the contrary, he reminds me of the above. i'm scared to stand up to hm because he is at least being nice right now. What should i do?

You're scared to stand up to him because that might set him off? If you don't feel comfortable and in control when he's in YOUR home, don't let him in! It's not ok to let him in as long "as he doesn't cause trouble." If you can't stand up to him when he's being 'nice', what will you do when he's already in the house and gets angry?

Go get a restraining order preventing him from entering your home and preventing him from taking your daughter during non-visitation times without *written* permission. Instruct your daughter not to let him in and to come get you when he shows up. (Maybe make it a game and practice with a friend playing dad?) Put childproof locks on the doors so she can't let him in even if he convinces her to try.

He is definitely threatening you and trying to control you. Have your lawyer write him a letter saying that if he takes your daughter from the home, you will charge him with kidnapping/custodial interference. Then do it! The requirement of written permission will let police know that his claim that you SAID he could take her is insufficient.

Good luck. Be strong for your daughter - she needs to see you stand up to him.

Tracey

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This is not legal advice and you are not my client. Double check everything with your own attorney and your state's laws.